Trying to Implement Islam in My Life
It seemed clear that Islam had all of the answers. It cleared up the confusion of the lie of the trinity and asserted Jesus’ true role as a Prophet, and not as the son of God. Islam reveres all of the prophets and recognizes them for the great people they were. In Islam and the values it promotes, I saw the answer to my problems and questions, and the future of mankind. My main issue was to try implementing Islam in my life.
As I said before, I was married to a woman who came from the same background as I did. She didn’t have an easy time dealing with my interest in this subject, whether it be Islam or Middle Eastern politics. I knew that the way I needed to change my life was to start living in a proper manner, but I knew this was going to cause us serious issues. It eventually came to the point where I would be unable to practice my new found religion and stay married to this woman, so we split up. Before I left England, I went with a young Lebanese man I had met in London and said my Shahadah in a mosque there.
When I left my ex-wife, I was forced to leave England. I would have loved to stay there because the opportunity to learn about my newfound religion there would have been great, but al-hamdu lillah, I was to learn later why God chose this turn of events for me. I quickly got a job working for the US government in Alaska.
Of course, there is not much in the way of a Muslim community in Alaska, and it is centered in Anchorage and Fairbanks. I was working hundreds of miles from either of these cities, so I took the opportunity to continue reading and searching for information concerning Islam the best I could, from the Internet and other sources.
Seeking a Good Muslim Wife
I used to travel, from time to time, to the Washington DC area for business. I made friends within the Muslim community there. At this point, I had been thinking about getting married. I had been divorced for several years and I knew that one of the main ways for Muslims to fulfill their deen (religion) is through marriage.
I was a bit worried about this, being a convert. I knew that many Muslims came from ethnic backgrounds that would not be too welcoming of a white American convert marrying their daughter. This was compounded further because I had tattoos from my teenage years, and I was very uncertain that I would find a Muslim woman and her family that would accept me.
A new friend of mine said that he knew of a sister who was looking to get married, so he asked her if it was OK to give me her number. I tried to call her when I first got home, but she wasn’t there and I left a message. The next day I called her back, and we talked for hours. We exchanged e-mail addresses and for the next 3 days, we talked for dozens of hours. We hardly slept those first 3 days. I got so little sleep that I found myself falling asleep at work. We talked about all of the important things that we would need to know to make a successful marriage work.
It was clear from the beginning that we had a lot in common, and that it all centered around our devotion to our faith and to God. I had this feeling that she was meant for me. She was such a good God-fearing Muslim woman and she had so much she could teach me about the religion. Not only could she teach me about religion, but she could also help me with Arabic because she was a native speaker. We talked on the phone and via e-mail for several months.
Talking and e-mailing were wonderful, but we both knew that we had to meet each other face-to-face to see if the connection we had would still be there. Always keeping God and our religion in mind, we wanted to make sure we did everything halal and in the proper manner. We decided, with the permission of her family, that I would visit during Ramadan of that year to join the family for dinner and the breaking of the fast.
I was very nervous, and I think I had a right to be. There is one bit of information I have left out here and after I say this, you will understand my nerves. My wife and her family are from Saudi Arabia; both of her parents were born in Makkah. My earlier fear of the cultural issues that any prospective wife and her family might have with me were compounded 100 percent by this fact.
Trusting in God, and having a lump in my throat, I set off to meet this wonderful woman and what I supposed to be her intimidating family. I arrived in Washington DC right before sundown, collected my bags, and waited for a taxi. When it was my turn for a taxi, I jumped in.
The taxi driver was wearing a red and white checkered ghutra, or Arab headdress. I greeted him with “as-salamu `alaykum” and he returned the greeting. The sun had gone down and he was just breaking his fast with a date. He asked if I was fasting, and when I replied in the positive, he offered me one of his own dates to break my fast. It turned out this nice older gentleman was originally from Afghanistan, I saw this as a very positive sign.
After dropping off my luggage at my hotel, I proceeded to the family’s house with a traditional gift of dates and incense in hand. As I got out of the taxi and started walking up to the door, I just said “bismillah” to myself and knew God would choose the best for me.
All sorts of scenarios played through my mind. She would like me, but the family would hate me. The family wouldn’t mind, but she would be indifferent. What if they liked me and I didn’t like them? The 20-foot walk from the curb to the door seemed to me like 20 miles. Finally, I got to the door and rang the bell.
What seemed to be a dozen people answered the door: family elders, people my age, sisters, sons, daughters, and family friends. I was warmly welcomed and asked to come into the house. After I entered, I was asked to take off my shoes and join the family in the meal they had made for me. It turned out, al-hamdu lillah, that I need not have been worried. The family and I took to each other instantly. In talking during the dinner and after, it was clear that the nice young woman and I had a connection that transcended the miles and the phone line.
I came back to the Washington DC area that January, when we got married in front of friends and family. We took a nice honeymoon, and then I had to return to my work in Alaska, which was not to finish until the end of April. When it finished, I moved to the Washington DC area and took up a job with a division of my company. I have been here almost 2 years now.
It is amazing how God led me from disbelief in a home filled with hate and then guided me to Him. At first glance, it might seem that in my childhood house I couldn’t have been farther from Allah, but I would argue that this wasn’t the case. Allah was always there looking out for me; He directed me through some dangerous and bad times to become the man and the Muslim that I am today.
People say that miracles do not happen today, but I would contend that my story proves them wrong.