I can't easily sleep. At home, I'm not close to anyone. If I tell them about my issue, they will say I just think too much that's why it is happening. I don't have any sister, thus I share things with my cousins but only when I meet them. I'm deep inside disappointed, and I really don't know its reason.
I cry in loneliness when my mind is under a lot of pressure. I recite surahs also. I feel afraid of everything; I keep thinking about what will happen, about the existence of this world, etc.
I was scared of death because of the 4 deaths occurred in my family one after the other. One was a young cousin of mine; her sudden death disturbed me a lot. I got better but the fear of death is still here, and whenever I get sick, I think I will die.
Bad thoughts keep revolving in my mind; if I see something bad on the TV, I get disturbed and scared. I graduated college a year ago and now started again to keep myself busy, but there are bad thoughts going in my mind.
I do pray 3 or 4 times a day. Sometimes, I feel that my faith is weak, and at that very moment, I feel scared so much. I want my faith to be strong, and also I don't want to lose hope. Please help me out. I want to have a happy life, but that happiness is lost somewhere inside me.
Answer
In this counseling answer:
• I’d highly recommend you seek counseling from a qualified and competent therapist.
• If you have a headache, don’t you take medication to make it disappear? Then it is the same for mental health.
As-Salamu `Alaikum dear,
Thank you for your question. Given the losses you’ve experienced, it is not surprising that you are depressed and in a lot of pain. Based on your question, it also seems like you’re not close to any of your family members, nor do you have many friends. This is a lonely place to be. Loneliness is difficult for most of us; we are intended to be social by the grace of Allah.
You have taken a lot of responsibility for the world and what will happen to all of us when this is not for you to worry about. Leave that to Allah.
What concerns me the most in your email is that your mind is racing with “rubbish thoughts.” This could be an organic issue that is fully biological and not within your control. Thus, I’d highly recommend you seek counseling from a qualified and competent therapist. Describe in depth how your mind is racing, what kinds of thoughts you are having and when the thoughts are most prevalent.
A good therapist can make a diagnosis, and you may even be prescribed medication by a psychiatrist. This is nothing to be ashamed of; in fact, I wish more people who need assistance would seek help.
Most societies have stigmas related to mental health services. However, think of it this way: if you have a headache, don’t you take medication to make it disappear? Then it is the same for mental health. If you need assistance, don’t be ashamed, but rather seek it so that you can live this cherished and valuable life to the fullest.
Check out this counseling video:
In addition, talk to the therapist about the deaths you’ve experienced, your relationships, and how to make them stronger and more fulfilling for you.
Life is short my dear, and there is much good to be done. Go forth and do it, but only after you’ve first taken care of yourself!
May Allah make it easy for you,
***
Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.
