Dear Brothers/Sisters,

Thank you very much for joining us in this Fatwa session. We would also like to thank our guest, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, for answering the questions directed to him. You will find the answers to your questions below.

Question 1:

At 25 years old, I find myself living with my kind and supportive parents who cater to my needs and understand my feelings deeply. Despite their efforts, I struggle with understanding myself and have become increasingly lazy, spending my days at home without contributing to household chores or working, even though I have completed my studies. Three months ago, I married my fiancé, but I am uncertain if I made the right decision, and I am currently facing numerous challenges.

During our engagement, my fiancé cheated on me multiple times, and I discovered text messages between him and his cousin, revealing a troubling relationship. She confided in me that he had forced her, and there was even a pregnancy scare, which he resolved with emergency contraception. Despite this betrayal, he begged for forgiveness, blamed her, and promised to change. His family, who were initially against our marriage due to community differences, eventually agreed after much persuasion from him. (His parents hates me now)
I had a few conditions for our marriage:
He shouldn’t visit his cousin’s place (his mother’s sister).
He should give me a monthly allowance of 10,000 INR out of his 35,000 INR salary, but he only did this till second month. He told his parents about him giving me allowance. Now, his parents argue that I shouldn’t ask for money and that my father should continue to support me.. and he claims financial difficulties and wants to reduce to 5,000 INR instead. Should I have to agree? Or I should stop taking it?

My father covered all the wedding expenses because my husband/inlaws didn’t save anything. And his stubborn parents agreed to give only 10000INR as mahr and he too was fine with it, he knew in my community and his own people give gold or something more but least interested.
We haven’t had a proper first night because his parents wanted to wait until the Rukhsati ceremony. However, whenever he visits my house on weekends, which is only ten minutes away, he desires intercourse everytime and his parents are not aware of it because he says he doesn’t come to my room, but when i call him for my needs, he makes excuses saying his parents won’t leave him out or his mother not keeping well. I do get angry and argue with him but yet he chooses not to come when i am in need of intimacy. He also denies staying with me for a night, i beg him everytime but he says his parents won’t speak to him so he leaves, but my parents don’t have any issues like his. They dislike his visits and often punish him with silence or scolding when he returns home.

His parents demand that he visit his cousin whenever they do, and his mother cries if he refuses. and he feels guilty for not going. He plans to go abroad but doesn’t want to take me, asking me to stay and win his parents heart. His mother is always sick and she doesn’t do anything in house, everything is messed up… my husband cooks and cleans and does household. He has three siblings of age 25 brother who works, 19 sister whos going to college and 12 brother who is in school. He wants to do everything for them.
I’m scared if he goes alone he might see someone else.. also do i have the right to ask him not to go alone. How do i make him understand because he doesn’t care or understand what i say.

I struggle to move past his previous cheating, which causes arguments. He spends a lot on his younger siblings but doesn’t save for our future. His mother constantly pressures him to spend money.

He avoids discussing the Rukhsati ceremony because he’s unsure about it.
He visits his aunt’s house for work (stays 2days) Sometime she comes there as her parents are unaware of all this. It makes me feel insecure. He was also p**n addictive and I don’t know about now. He is also very religious and he thinks like Allah will forgive you no matter what sins you commit.. so he is not afraid to commit sin i feel by his behaviour.
His parents try to control my life through him, advising him not to listen to me.
They plan to move closer to his aunt, and he is indifferent to how this affects me.
He promised to take me on trips and buy me gifts, but none of that has happened since our wedding. I feel clueless and left out, missing him when he’s not around.
When he does visit, he only wants to be physical. He says he loves me but I’m not understanding. He keep saying he doesn’t want to hurt his parents because they went through a lot. He doesn’t understand what I’m feeling. His mother always emotionally blackmails him… I rarely visit non Muslim psychologist, doctor advised to take 10000INR monthly and to not allow him to go abroad alone, and to tackle him with love, but I’m not understanding how to do it. Because he stays with his parents and siblings. His mother talks to him every day about her sister and his father’s family. Sometimes she mentions the girl he cheated on, saying she’s marrying his cousin, which bothers both of us, though I’m not sure why it bothers him. He is very interested in family gossip, and his mother always shares it with him. Sometimes, I feel like I should avoid these conversations by not talking to him much and staying silent. But when I try, he doesn’t make any effort to talk to me, and I end up constantly checking my phone or waiting for him at the door. I feel like I have no self-respect in this situation. Am I wrong? Am i bad person thinking too much? My parents doesn’t know all this, my brother is drug addict and all these things happened to me my parents are very innocent and sincerely i feel bad for them. They always supported me in everything… I’m not understanding things.

I feel insecure about my appearance compared to the girl he cheated with, who is prettier a j more stylish. How do I navigate these challenges?

Answer 1:

I empathize with your situation.

If what you allege of your husband is true, he is indeed destroying his life. Marriage is built upon mutual trust and commitment to share and care. Your husband’s behavior shows that he has failed to earn your trust. He is involved in an adulterous relationship with his cousin, and he shows no sign of leaving it. He has broken the promises he has given you before marriage. If all of these are true, I do not see how you can trust him to build a happy marriage. You should only continue if you follow through with the commitments as the therapist has suggested:

1. To break off all relationships with his cousin and stop seeing her, including going to his aunt’s place when she is there.
2. He should be willing to fulfill his commitments before marriage unless you want to forego or forgive.
3. To spend time with you so that you can feel your need for intimacy is fulfilled.
4. Furthermore, he should be willing to balance his duties towards his mother and father with his responsibilities towards you as his wife.

If he is not willing to change and take responsibility for setting things right, then it is best that you decide to part ways for your peace of mind. There is no use in staying in a marriage where you find no peace of mind or tranquility.

I must also stress that you should take charge of your own life.

You cannot let your husband rule or control your mind. You can find peace only when you recognize that you cannot change your husband; you can only change yourself.

So, ask yourself: Do I want to lose my peace of mind because of the evil actions of my husband?

You admit you are lazy, and you have no interest in work. You need to change this habit. When you start engaging in productive work, you can gain focus and peace of mind. As Imam Shafi said, an idle mind will be occupied by Satan.

Satan takes charge of the minds of those who are heedless and are complacent about establishing the remembrance of Allah. Satan vowed to Allah,

Iblis said, “My Lord, because you have left me to stray, I will entice them on the earth and lead them astray—all, except those among your servants who are chosen.” God affirmed, “This is a straight path to Me) for those who are chosen). “You shall have no authority over My servants, except those who err, who choose to follow you.” (Qur’an:15: 39: 42).

I urge you to take charge of yourself.

You should pray to Allah to guide your husband to see the horror of his actions and the toll they are taking on his life and your life.

It would also be best for you to speak to a therapist who specializes in counseling. I’m sure the editor can help you communicate with one of them, as some professionals appear occasionally on this site.

Editor’s note:

You can submit your query via this link:

Question 2:

Is it permissible to do istighfar many times and recite darood shareef many times everyday for forgiveness from the sins (like: major and minor shirk,kufr,bidah, backbiting) if those sins were done both knowingly and unknowingly?

Answer 2:

Making Istighfar and reading Darood Shareef are indeed the most excellent deeds in Islam.  The Prophet (peace be upon him) advised, “O people, seek forgiveness of Allah and turn to Him in repentance (as often as you can). I do make Istighfar a hundred times a day.” (Reported by Muslim)

So, if you have been guilty of sins in the past, there is no need to despair of Allah’s mercy; you can seek forgiveness and change your life.

For details on seeking forgiveness for various types of sins, I would like to cite here one of my previous answers:

“It is never too late for a true Muslim to repent to Allah, and to shed tears for the wrongdoing he has committed, keeping in mind that if one manages to escape the punishment of mortals, he will not for sure escape the punishment of Allah in the Hereafter. So, it is better to start a new leaf and let bygones be bygones. As long as you are sincere in your repentance, Allah Almighty will accept your Repentance and forgive you your sins.

If you committed evil but have repented sincerely, and changed your life around for the better, then Allah has certainly promised to grant you mercy and forgiveness. It is one of the basic principles of belief in Islam that Allah is All-Relenting, All-Forgiving, and All-Merciful.

Here are a few verses which convey this crucial concept:

Do they not know that it is Allah Who accepts the repentance of His servants and receives (approves) their charity and that Allah is the Relenting, the Compassionate? (At-Tawbah 9: 104)

Say: ‘O My servants who wronged against their souls, do not despair of Allah’s mercy! For Allah forgives all sins; for He is indeed Forgiving, Compassionate. (Az-Zumar 39: 53)

So do not put off repentance; take the necessary steps immediately, for no one can tell when the death will overtake us. The door of repentance is open so long as we are not in the throes of death, for the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Allah accepts the repentance of His servant so long as death has not reached his collar bone.” But since we have no way of knowing when death will overtake us, we must never be complacent or slack in hastening to taking steps towards repentance.

While speaking of repentance, we must rush to add, that it cannot be considered as valid unless one takes the following steps:

• One must feel deep remorse for the sins one has committed.
• One must refrain from it totally while also abstaining from all those leads or circumstances that led him to such a sin in the first place.
• He must be firmly resolved never to sin again, and immediately becoming occupied in whatever good deeds that he can in order to wipe out his past sins.
• All of the above involve sins involving the rights of Allah; if, however, your sins involve the rights of human beings, then you must also do whatever it takes to return or compensate or redress the grievances of the person you have wronged. Paying him his dues or compensating him in whatever ways possibly becomes an essential condition of valid repentance.

Repentance, as stated above once accomplished, will undoubtedly wipe out one’s sins, and guarantee him a clean record. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “One who has repented of a sin (sincerely) is like one who has never sinned at all.” sinned at all.”

In conclusion, after sinning, one should not feel despair. Rather one should forward sincere repentance to Allah and rest assured that Allah Almighty will forgive his sin, as long as his repentance meets the abovementioned conditions of sincerity. Moreover, you must learn how to forget, for the more you look back to your old days of sinful habit, the wider the door is open for Satan to draw you back. Scholars used to resemble this case to that of gazelle being chased by hound. Despite that gazelle is naturally faster in speed, but its frequent looking back weakens its morale and makes it an easy prey for hounds.”

Question 3:

Hi I recently found out I am 4 weeks. My partner and I have been dating for 3 years. I never met his family because we are suppose to be engaged before I meet his family. He was going to propose to me this summer. Until I found out I was pregnant. I am Christian and my partner is Muslim. My partner has asked me to abort and said if I dont abort he will leave me. I don’t want to abort as I feel that this child is a blessing. I really don’t know what to do.

Answer 3:

You say you are a Christian. Since I am not an expert in the Christian faith, I cannot advise you based on your faith tradition. I can only advise you based on the Islamic perspective on abortion, which is as stated below:

“Abortion or termination of pregnancy is generally considered abominable, and therefore as Haram (forbidden) since it involves interfering with the process once it has started. There are, however, differences of opinion about the permissibility of abortion in special circumstances depending on the stage or stages of pregnancy.

1) There is a unanimous consensus among scholars that abortion is considered forbidden after twelve weeks of conception (i.e. one hundred and twenty days); this is the point when ensoulment (breathing of soul into the embryo) takes place. To abort pregnancy from this point onwards is akin to committing infanticide, which has been condemned in the Qur’an. Scholars, however, have made a single exception to this rule: If the continuation of pregnancy and carrying it through full term proves to be risking the mother’s life, abortion shall be considered permissible.

2) Abortion after the expiry of the first forty days of conception is considered as Haram (forbidden) except in the following exceptional cases: 1) If carrying the pregnancy to the full term exposes the mother to unbearable health problems during or after delivery; 2) if, as determined by the reliable medical practitioners, the child shall be borne with such physical and mental deformity as would deprive him/her a normal life. This decision must be based on the opinion of at least two reliable medical experts in the field.

3) While many scholars consider abortion before the expiry of the first forty days of conception as Haram, a number of them, however, consider it as either permissible or at least not as Haram.

In conclusion, as Imam Ghazzali has observed, one is discouraged from tampering with the life process once it has started; the intensity of sin, however, varies according to how advanced the pregnancy is. Thus while it may be considered as less sinful in the very early days, it is considered as absolutely Haram after the ensoulment.”

You should refer this to your fiancé and make a decision based on your moral conscience. After all, each person is responsible for their actions before the Creator before whom we must stand for the Final Reckoning.

Most importantly, you both need to turn to God in repentance for your extra-marital relationship and choose to live in a married relationship. You can only expect God’s mercy when you obey Him and surrender to His will. I pray to Allah to guide you.

Question 4:

I am a Muslim girl in love with a boy. He is kind considerate and respectful. He has lots of Islamic values, but he does not believe in God. We do not plan to have children. He wouldn’t ever try to stop me from practicing religion he encourages me to stay connected to who I am and my beliefs. He values family, and he loves me truly. I want to marry him; how can I do this?

Answer 4:

I am so sorry to know that you are a Muslim girl who wants to marry a boy who does not believe in God.

Marriage is a union of two souls based on shared values and responsibilities.  The source of values for Muslims is the faith in the Oneness of Allah, around which their lives revolve. Without faith in God and commitment to Him, life becomes an empty shell devoid of meaning and purpose.

Married life is not like life in a movie; life exposes us to challenges, tests, and trials. It is virtually impossible to navigate through the rough waters of life without robust faith, surrender, and trust in God.

Since the boy you want to marry does not believe in God, your life will be like a ship without an anchor tossed left and right under the pull of the mighty waves, thus facing imminent drowning.

Therefore, no conscientious Muslim or Muslimah can entertain such an idea. I urge you to pray to God to guide you in choosing a marriage partner with shared spiritual and moral values. The Prophet (peace be upon him) orders us to choose spouses based on sound faith and character.

He also warns us that we are doomed if we neglect these criteria.

Question 5:

Can me and my boyfriend pray together in the mosque?

Answer 5:

The very notion of a girlfriend and boyfriend is an anathema in Islam. A man and woman are strangers unto one another as far as isolation and free mixing are concerned until they are married.

Therefore, you are like any two boys or girls in a mosque.  If the ethical guidelines governing male and female interactions are observed, there is no objection if you pray behind each other.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “When a man and a woman spend in isolation with each other, Satan is likely to join them as a third companion.”  Allah says, “Do not venture near adultery for it is an indecency, an evil way.” (Qur’an: 17:32)

Allah’s laws aim to guard us against the evil inclinations inherent in our souls, for Allah alone knows what is good for us and what is evil. Hence, His laws are for our benefit and protection.

Therefore, I urge you to stop hanging around together until you are married.

Question 6:

I have been married for 4+ years. I had a rough childhood and been dealing with mental (extreme anger, depression and bipolarism) issues and lived alone for 16 years. I sought therapy years before getting married which somewhat helped me get by but my mental health issues recurred after I got married. I was in extreme state of anger and said Divorce to my wife at different occasions (2-3) and regretted soon after coming back to my senses. I have been taking anti-depressants for almost 2 years and starting therapy in a week. My wife also acknowledges my bipolarism and have discussed with psychologist. My question is where does my marriage stands? I also have a written note from my psychiatrist stating these issues.

Answer 6:

If the specialist who has been treating you thinks that your medical challenges can impair your judgment, then such pronouncements of divorce can be deemed invalid. If, however, they do not affect your judgment, then you are accountable for your actions.

I would urge you to seek counseling from a professional who can advise you on how to manage your anger. Anger is the vehicle that Satan uses to destroy us. So, one must be on guard against it.

For further details on the legal validity of divorce in anger, you may access the following answer:

Talaq in Anger: Valid? | About Islam

Question 7:

I’ve been living in a small village in northern Norway with my family for 9 years. I suffer from depression due to the lack of sunlight. Although my family promised we would move, my father now refuses because of the cheap housing and wants us to give him our earnings. He has even threatened to curse anyone who leaves. I’ve completed my studies, but it’s hard to find work here. My family agrees with my father, but for my well-being, I’m considering moving out on my own.

So, my question is, is my future going to be bad or difficult because of the father curse? Is it haram to think about myself? Is it haram to live alone as a girl?

Answer 7:

If you are unmarried, you cannot leave your home without your guardian’s permission. Your father is your guardian. This ruling is wise to protect women, as their safety can be compromised because of the rampant corruption and loose lifestyles around them. 

So, it would help if you got your father’s consent to move out.

The only exception is when you have no choice but to move for the sake of your health. Such a decision should be based only on the opinion of your physician or the professional who treats you.

If that is the case, you may move as long as you can rest assured of your safety and personal protection.

Question 8:

Question #1: If someone has had waswas for more than a few months now also their connection with Allah (S.W.T) it’s not as strong as it used to be and the waswas or maybe it could be their nafs is draining them to the point that they don’t have khusho in prayer or enjoy acts of Ibadah anymore and now they are on their menstruation cycle and they are happy about it and they smiled is this kufr? Even though they want to pray obviously after they finished their menstruation cycle but they just feel so anxious about prayer at times and or are worried if they act on their thoughts and they don’t know if this is kufr?
How does someone know if they acted on their thoughts what if they smile on their kufr thoughts and they don’t know their intentions in that moment.

Intrusive waswas

Answer 8:

You don’t need to worry about such doubts -as long as you do not dwell on them and repel them by making Istighfar and seeking refuge in Allah.

Imam Muslim reports on the authority of Abu Hurayrah that the Companions of the Prophet (peace be upon him) once complained to him: “Often such thoughts occur in our minds of which we do not even dare to speak about?’. The Prophet said, “that is pure faith!”

Explaining this hadith, Imam An-Nawawi says, “We are not accountable for the flashes of thoughts or self talks that assail our minds as long as we do not dwell on them. This is the consensus of scholars; and that is what is intended by the above hadith. Such thoughts may even include sins such as ghibah (thinking or speaking evil of others) and words of infidelity”.  The fact that one does not allow himself to pursue such thoughts and feels bad about them and find it sinful even to divulge them is an indication of true faith. In other words, no human being can be free of such doubts and whisperings from Satan, but no sooner such thoughts occur to a believer, he must repel them and seek refuge in Allah.

Allah says, “If any suggestion from Satan assails you, then seek God’s protection, for He hears and knows (all things). Those who bring (God) to mind when an evil thought from Satan assails them are reminded (of their allegiance to God), and suddenly they can see clearly again! However, their (evil) ‘brothers’ will always seek to plunge them into error, and they never let up.” (Qur’an: 7: 200-202)

Therefore, I urge you to seek refuge in Allah from the whisperings of Satan. And make sure to arm yourself always with dhikr and du’a. For there is no better weapon to defeat Satan than dhikr and du’a: It is reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Satan runs through the blood veins of the children of Adam; however, when they remember Allah, he retreats immediately.”   

Question 9:

My parents got divorced, and throughout the divorce, my father mistreated me and got me involved in their relationship (told me I was a bad Muslim, mocked my deen, called me a thief, blamed me for the divorce, etc). In two arguments we had, he disowned me. He also refused to let me visit him.

Currently, he is suing my mother and going after the savings she is using to provide for me and my brothers since he dosen’t send proper child support.

His family is also involved with sahirs, and they have done black magic on people in my family before.

His family would also take pictures of me without my hijab, and he did nothing to prevent it and allowed them to keep the pictures and send them to my non mahram.
As of now, due to these circumstances, I do not visit him, but I send him emails even though he ignores them to keep the family ties.

I am now inshaallah planning on looking to get married.
My question is, can I have my brother, or my mothers father as my wali?
I do not want to make this decision based on my hurt and anger, but based on the rules Allah has set. Jazakallahukeir. (Sorry for the long explanation)

Answer 9:

Suppose your father has disowned you and refuses to take responsibility for making amends for his abuse and mistreatment of your mother and his children. In that case, you don’t need to wait for his permission to get married, especially if he does not respond to your email messages.

In the absence of your father, your brother can serve as your guardian and represent you in your marriage.

Question 10:

My husband had secret visits to Thai massage centers for the last six years. I came across it while listening to him when he was calling Thai massage for half an hour of body-to-body massage. He went there on that day, but I am not sure if he committed Zina or not. I confronted my husband, but he denied any previous visits or sexual relationships with them. I searched his map history which showed his visits. On further searching, he was involved in watching pornography and local escort availabilities. He now admits everything except committing zina. He is embarrassed and repents, promising not to do it again in the future. He blames me for all that since I was busy in upbringing my child all alone. He never helped me with household chores. In this society where all such activities are legalized, he says that I am responsible for all that because I showed no interest in intimacy. I want to get a divorce because he is not being open in conversation and not telling me the truth. He deleted all pictures, map histories, browsing histories, etc. What should I do in this situation, I am not clear whether he is trustworthy in the future or not. Please help me

Answer 10:

I empathize with your situation. Your husband has a severe issue related to sexual perversion and promiscuity. He is rationalizing his behavior by blaming you. However, suppose you neglected his need for intimacy. In that case, you may also be partially responsible for his actions, in which case, you need to admit your mistake and commit yourself to doing everything within your means to ensure that you have done your part. In this case, you need to give him another chance.

He must repent and take immediate steps to come clean by cutting off all contact with those agencies or personnel and giving you free access to verify that he has done so. You can continue your spousal relations once he has taken the steps to seek repentance.

He also needs to seek professional counseling to break free of such addictions.

If you have no reason to trust him, you should decide to part ways. As a conscientious Muslimah, you cannot tolerate a person who leads a promiscuous lifestyle addicted to sexual perversion.

Such addictions are abominations that would cause the death of the spiritual heart.

For details on how to break free of addictions, let me copy here one of my previous answers, which you should share with him:

“If you have been addicted to porn and sexual indiscretions, you ought to know that they are extremely pernicious behavior that can destroy your spiritual soul and thus lead to self-destruction. Therefore, for the sake of your salvation, you must urgently summon your willpower and take all the necessary steps that you can muster to wean yourself of it immediately.

In order to empower yourself to achieve this, you should seek beneficial counseling and therapy preferably from those professionals in the field who are conscientious Muslims; if such Muslim professionals are not available from those who are ethically and morally conscious. You need to wean yourself of these pernicious habits; the consequences of persisting in them are simply unthinkable; they would undoubtedly corrode your spiritual soul and cause your spiritual death.

Sins by their very nature are addictive, for it is in the very nature of carnal soul to seek pleasure in sins. As Busiri has rightly said, “Carnal soul is like a baby; if you neglect him, he will grow up clinging on to the breast milk forever, but if you wean him off, he will be weaned off.” I suggest a few tips which you can use to empower yourself:

1) Visualize and meditate on the ugliness of this heinous sin and conjure up images of hell fire as painted in the Qur’an and the Sunnah as many times as possible until such time that whenever you are tempted to visit such sites or view such scenes will be constantly playing in the screen of your mind; thus even as you have associated this addiction with pleasure you will come to associate it with pure pain and suffering.

2) Convince yourself—by taking all measures such as listing all the negative things about such habits, and listing the verses and traditions about the gravity of sins—of the urgency of removing this malignant cancer from your life; remember it is far more serious than cancer attacking your body since your soul survives you even after your physical body has disintegrated in the earth.

3) Imagine how terrible a loss you would be facing were you to die while being addicted to this most heinous sin.

4) Seek strength from Allah by crying to Him for succor, but you can never seek the help of Allah unless you seek to establish a connection with Him through regular Prayers; so never be slack in Your Prayers.

5) Schedule your time in such a way that you are never left with any time to think of such matters; Imam Shafi said: “If you don’t occupy your mind with good works, your carnal soul will make you busy in bad deeds!”

6) Surround yourself with spiritual and Islamic influences and virtually immerse yourself in them.

7) Always hang around with good Muslims who are busy doing good works; join a halaqah where spiritual training is imparted together with study of Islam

8) Make your mind and tongue busy with dhikr Allah; say the following words and others frequently:

Subhaana Allaah; al-hamdu li Allah; laa ilaaha illa Allaah, Allaahu akbar;

wa laa hawla walaa quwwata illaa bi Allaah; astaghfir Allaaha al-azeem min kulli dhanbin wa atoobu ilaahi

(Glory be to Allah; praise be to Allah; there is no god but Allah, Allah is Great; there is no power or strength except by the will of Allah; I ask forgiveness of Allah from all my sins and repent to Him.)

9) Once you have been weaned of these pernicious habits, you should seriously consider marriage; marriage is the protection against temptations.

I pray that the Beneficent Lord of Mercy save us all from the evil inclinations of our souls and make us hate disbelief, transgressions, and sins; and may He endear faith and virtuous deeds to  our hearts—Amen.”  

Question 11:

There is a circulation of a version of the Prophet’s sermon according to al tabari or IBN ishaq where he compared women to domestic animals given the prophet’s (pbuhs) character I find this hard to comprehend or believe that he said such a thing.

Answer 11:

It is wrong to attribute such a false idea to the Prophet (peace be upon him), who was far ahead of his time in raising the status of women. At a time when the great religious traditions even questioned women possessing souls, the Quran proclaimed that both women and women were created of the same soul and that men and women had equal spiritual status. “Their Lord answered them, “I shall not allow the deeds of any of you—whether you are male or female—to be lost; you are from one another.” (Qur’an: 3: 195)

The Quran reiterates the identical spiritual essence of men and women:

Humankind, be mindful of your Lord, Who created you from a single soul, and from this

created its mate, multiplying them into multitudes of men and women.” (Qur’an: 4: 1)

In its stance on accountability for deeds, the Qur’an underlines individual responsibility and equality in Islam. It states that each person, whether male or female, is accountable for their deeds. Furthermore, Allah emphatically, just as men have rights, women have rights too: “And their rights are similar to the rights over them, as in what is known to be fair.” (Qur’an: 2: 228)

 And Allah orders men to treat women most honorably. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “It is the honorable men who shall honor women, and it is the most dishonorable men who shall dishonor women.”

Regarding the statement you mentioned, it is a mistranslation. The Prophet referred to women as ‘awan with you ‘; thus, he wanted to remind men that women in marriage are under your protection, and you ought to treat them honorably and kindly. By stating this, he explained the Quranic verse that places the responsibility of maintaining and supporting women.

Therefore, denigrating women was the farthest from the mind of the Prophet (peace be upon him) who was known as the true liberator of women.

Question 12:

I have a question regarding plushies and dolls.
I own several, which I use mainly as pillows and for embrace when I sleep at night.
Adding some context: I am a 20 year-old autistic woman and cuddling with these plushies helps me a lot when I’m feeling tense or overhelmend. My question being, is it all right ? As I’ve read that having dolls and plushies is okay, but (only ?) for little girls, and some say that angels do not enter your house otherwise because it would be considered a “picture with a shape”.
So can I keep some as an adult ? And can I display them on a shelf for instance (with zero intention to adore or worship them, of course), merely as a way to decorate or when I need to organize my things ?

My other question, would it be all right to make such plushies myself ? I recently got back into crocheting and I’d like to make some, to keep them for myself, decorate my house, and eventually sell them.

Would it be all right to make and keep them ? And sell them ? Even if it is not just kids using them eventually ?

I already mostly gave up on drawing, which I loved, because I’ve read so many people saying one thing and its opposite, some saying that it’s okay as long as it’s not meant for shirk and some saying it’s wrong regardless of the intention.

I do not want to displease Allah, but at the same time if it is actually okay, I’d rather not miss on an activity that could otherwise bring me joy and comfort…
Thank you in advance for your answer.

Answer 12:

If the specialist treating you is recommending plushies and dolls, then you may use them. As I can learn from the sources, they can help relieve stress and ease depression for some people. While they aren’t a cure-all or a replacement for professional help, they can offer comfort and support in several ways.

To list some of them as I have gleaned from the sources:

1. Physical comfort: The soft texture of plushies and dolls can be soothing to touch and cuddle. This physical contact can release oxytocin, a hormone that reduces stress and promotes relaxation.

2. Emotional connection: Plushies and dolls can become cherished companions, providing security and unconditional love. This emotional connection can be beneficial for people who feel isolated or lonely.

3. Sensory stimulation: Plushies and dolls’ different textures, colors, and sounds can engage the senses and provide a calming distraction from negative thoughts and feelings.

4. Self-expression: Creating or customizing plushies and dolls can be a creative outlet for self-expression and stress relief. Therefore, I do not find anything objectionable from an Islamic point of view for you to use them to treat your emotional challenges.  

Question 13:

Is the captcha typing job halal….here we have to solve the captcha and we earn a small amount of money?

Answer 13:

As I could learn from the sources, “CAPTCHAs are designed to prevent bots and automated programs from abusing online services. They serve as a security measure to protect websites and users.

CAPTCHA typing jobs directly undermine the purpose of CAPTCHAs. Having humans solve CAPTCHAs for bots enables malicious activities such as spam, fake account creation, and denial-of-service attacks”.

Based on these, I urge you to avoid looking into such dubious job opportunities. They may or may not be legitimate or ethical. Since we can never be sure of the outcome of our actions and how they are being used, we should avoid them altogether.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) warned us against committing dubious or doubtful actions, for by doing so, we can better safeguard our faith and honor. If, on the contrary, we were to engage in them, we may end up endangering our faith and honor.

It would help if you opened your mind to look for job opportunities- free of such dubious elements.

Allah can help you find one if you turn to Him earnestly and sincerely. Here is a dua I recommend.

Allaahumma aghninee bi halaalika an haraamika wabi fadlika amman siwaaka

(O Allah, make me self-sufficient with what You have made lawful for me so that I do not turn to that which is unlawful. And make me content with Your favor so that I do not look for favor of the  mortals)

Question 14:

i let someone else have the first row in the masjid since the person was an old man even though I was the first person there. should I have done it or should I have not given the old man the the first row and get the good deeds for myself ?

Answer 14:

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Those with wisdom/knowledge should stand close behind me.” Imam Ahmad said, “Those who are elderly and those knowledgeable in the Quran should stand right behind the imam, and the children should pray behind.”

One of the wisdoms behind this order is that if something happens to the Imam, then one of those standing behind him should replace him. That was what happened in the case of Umar Ibn al-Khattab. When he was leading the Fajr prayer, an assassin attacked him from behind, and Umar fell to the ground. Then Abd Allah b. Abbas stepped forward to complete the Salah.

Therefore, the Prophet’s companions practiced the precedent of ensuring that those known for their wisdom and knowledge should be in the first row.

We read in a report from Qays b. Abbad: I visited Madinah to see the Prophet’s companions (during the reign of Umar Ibn al-Khattab). When the iqamah was called, Umar came accompanied by some of the companions of the Prophet. I was standing in the first Saff; then one of them came and looked at me and told me to move to the second line, and he occupied the place. After the Prayer, he approached me and said, “I did not mean to offend you; I was acting on the advice of the Prophet, who had taught us to stand in the Saff right behind him, and since I did not recognize you, I told you to move.”  

The man who asked him to move was the eminent companion of the Prophet (peace be upon him) whom Qays, the reporter, had been looking forward to meeting.

If Ubayy’s action had been objectionable, other companions would have said so.

In light of the evidence above, if you left your spot from the first Saff to allow someone more elderly, wise, and knowledgeable, that is the Sunnah. Insha Allah, you can earn rewards for this gesture of goodwill.

Question 15:

Can I make a profit in currency exchange? For Example (Buying 1 dollar in 278 PKR and straight away selling it in 285 PKR).

Answer 15:

I am not an expert in Islamic finance. However, the general rule among scholars is that you are allowed to work if you exchange currency according to the standard rates of the market and stay away from any doubtful actions to influence the rates by resorting to dubious practices.

For details, you may refer to Dr. Monzer Kahf. You can contact him here:

Question 16:

my current husband and I got engaged and the two of us lived in an apartment because we were out of the country for two days. However, at some point we lost control and masturbated together (he fingered me and I gave him off). but we never saw each other’s parts nor did we touch our parts together. One website says that marriage is not valid if two such people marry without repenting. This scares the hell out of me because I do not remember if I repented properly or not. I only remember that I have asked Allah that after marriage my new life will begin and I will not commit such sin again. I have also planned to go to Umrah with my husband and ask for forgiveness in Makkah.

In that case, do I have to renew my marriage contract? And if I renew it, do I need my guardian’s permission again?

Answer 16:

You do not need to renew your marriage vows if you ask forgiveness before you have contracted your marriage. Otherwise, it would help if you did so. You don’t need permission from your guardian to restore it.

Question 17:

Is there a specific dua to make our love to come back and do things the halal way?

Thank you

Answer 17:

There are no prescribed duas for you to read except the following dua from the Qur’an:

Rabbanaa hab lanaa min azwaajinaa wa dhuriyyaathina qurratha aynin waijlnaa lil muttaqeena imaman

(Our Lord, grant us joy and comfort in our spouses and offspring and make us role models for the God-fearing).

You may also pray to Allah using any other words in any language you prefer. Allah hears prayers rising from our hearts even before we express them.

Let me, however, suggest a few here:

Allaahumma habbibnee li zawjee wa habbibhu ilayya

(O Allah, endear me to my husband and endear my husband to me)

Allaahumma allif bayana quloobinaa wa aslih dhaatha baynina

(O Allah, reconcile our hearts and bring peace and harmony between us)

Allaahumma mattinaa bi asmaainaa wa absaarinaa wa azwaajinaa wa dhuyrriyyaathinaa abadan maa ahyaythanaa

(O Allah, bless us in our faculties of hearing and vision and our spouses and children as long as you allow us to live).

Question 18:

I am a married guy but developed a long distance, text-only affair with a female colleague for almost 2 months. I then realized the hole I had fallen into and the fact that I love my wife and want to stay faithful to her, I stopped the affair. The colleague still chatted on-and-off and we still flirted over texts a few times over the next 7-8 months but it was no way an affair, rather temporary relapses in between.

My wife ended up reading her messages and realized we were in an affair. She was mad at me for a few weeks and devastated. I lied saying it was one-sided and I wanted to get rid of her, so that my wife still has trust in me that I was loyal. I was embarrassed to say the least and did not confess 100% my involvement into it. I prayed to Allah and did taubah and despite the colleague messaging me after that, I kept my distance with her.

Now this all almost 2 years back and a matter of the past. I am going to Makkah for umrah this month inshAllah. I don’t know if I should confess with 100% truth to my wife about this or keep it to myself. I don’t want to open this pandora box with her again but then again I fear that I have lied to my wife and if she asks me again for whatever reason while I am in umrah I don’t know if I should tell her the truth or not.

Please let me know in light of Quran and Sunnah
– should I confess 100% truth to her myself and ask for her forgiveness, knowing that this may worsen my relationship with my wife and create a drift that will be tough to resolve
– should I still maintain the lie despite being in a state of ihram/Umrah if she asks me during my visit to Makkah
– is this a sin I have committed against my wife and will she keep me accountable on the day of judgment despite my Tawbah with Allah?

Answer 18:

You should be worried more about how you will meet Allah than you worry about your wife finding out about your sexual indiscretions.  Therefore, I urge you to seek repentance and follow through with the necessary steps to come clean of your sexual indiscretions.

For details on repentance, you may access the following answer

The Door of Repentance Is Wide Open | About Islam

Your question about whether you need to divulge all your past indiscretions to your wife is answered no.

For details, you may access the following answer:

What Aspects of Our Past Must Be Revealed Before Marriage? (aboutislam.net)

Finally, you can go for Umrah to seek expiation and make amends for your past sins.

Question 19:

Is it allowed to use music made by musical instruments in my films which are about good topics without the propaganda of drugs, fitna, zina etc. I need to use music to deliver the context of the film in a better way, and music plays a huge role in the modern film industry. Will my income from my films which are beneficial for society (but using music) be halal?

Answer 19:

You may use clean music free of all unethical or immoral messages to enhance the delivery of educational or uplifting and informational content or presentations.

Islam is a religion that caters to all the genuine instincts of humankind; as such, we cannot say that Islam is opposed to all sorts of music.

For details, you may read the following answer:

What Type of Music Is Haram? | About Islam

Question 20:

If women abide by Islam’s teachings in a work environment, is it possible for them to join the military? (This is in the United States.)

Answer 20:

You are allowed to join the military on condition that you abide by Islamic teachings. For details, you may access the answer linked below:

Can Muslims Join the Army in Canada? | About Islam | About Islam

Although the question mentions Canada, it applies to the USA and other Secular countries that advocate pluralism and uphold freedom of religion.