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I Feel Hesitant Marrying This Married Man

23 August, 2023
Q Assalaamu Alaikum, good afternoon sister. I have been in a relationship for 8 months now with this man who is married with 2kids.

I was scared and worried to meet his wife and kids. I am an orphan. He met my eldest sister and younger brother just to identify himself, but he has not proposed to me. We don’t stay in the same city.

The last time he came over to see me we had a conversation. I asked him when we would settle down.

His response was "soon, because I need to sort some stuff out and also get a place for us to stay.” I'm still not convinced with his response.

Should I be bothered or trust his word?

Answer

Salam Alaikum,

In this counseling video, you will learn:

Do not have a pre-marital relationship with this man. Cut contact with him.

If he is serious, he should approach you through a mahram and seek marriage with you.

You may want to give him a deadline for him to decide whether he wants to approach this situation in a halal way.

As you are not even engaged with this man, you may want to see other men in a halal way.

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About Hannah Morris
Hannah Morris is a mum of 4 and she currently works as Counsellor and Instructor of BSc. Psychology at the Islamic Online University (IOU). She obtained her MA degree in Psychology and has over 10 years of experience working in health and social care settings in the UK, USA, and Ireland. Check out her personal Facebook page, ActiveMindCare, that promotes psychological well-being in the Ummah. (www.facebook.com/activemindcare)