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I Want to Start Wearing Hijab; Please Guide Me Through!

11 January, 2024
Q I am a 20 year old med student I so want to start wearing hijab but I feel I might not look attractive and it’s a lifelong responsibility what if I won’t be able to continue it I am scared, I feel I won’t be as impressive as I am now and it will restrict me in a bad way, but I really want to start wearing it , please guide me through this.

Answer

In this counseling answer:

  • Just remind yourself constantly of why you do this: you want Allah to be pleased with you when He looks at you.
  • Read the stories of other sisters who decided to wear the veil to get inspired.
  • Find your own style that you love.

Salam alaikom wa rahmatullhah, sister,

I am thrilled to read that you decided to wear the hijab, mashallah. May Allah bless you for the efforts you have been making for Him.

It is a huge step, indeed, and a big change in a woman’s life. You need to get used to seeing a different face in the mirror when stepping out in public.

It is not easy, but it is a beautiful step towards Allah to please Him in this way, too. Make sure He appreciates all your efforts, dear, and may Allah reward you.

Dear beautiful sister, many of us are afraid of making big decisions in life, such as donning the hijab.

However, if we stay in our comfort zone all the time and do not do anything we are scared of, we will never grow and achieve success.

Remember Why You Do This


Just remind yourself constantly of why you do this: you want Allah to be pleased with you when He looks at you.

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You seek His mercy and love. You love Him to the extent that you put His desire over yours, his pleasing over pleasing the people.

You know that if you please Allah in your life, He will shower you with His blessings in this life and the Hereafter. You will be happier and more successful, inshallah.

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Allah says: ‘I am just as My slave thinks I am, i.e., I am able to do for him what he thinks I can do for him), and I am with him if He remembers Me. If he remembers Me in himself, I too, remember him in Myself; and if he remembers Me in a group of people, I remember him in a group that is better than they; and if he comes one span nearer to Me, I go one cubit nearer to him; and if he comes one cubit nearer to Me, I go a distance of two outstretched arms nearer to him; and if he comes to Me walking, I go to him running.’ ” (Bukhari)

Believe me, very soon you will get used to the new look.

Make dua to Him to make this decision easy for you, make you steadfast in it, and make you love your hijab to the extent that after that you can’t even imagine life without it. When you feel insecure at any time, turn to Him.

Now it’s Ramadan, when the bigger Satans are chained and the doors of paradise are open. You might want to take this chance and start this new page in your life as a Muslim. May Allah reward you!

You mentioned that you are mainly afraid that you will not look attractive.

Sister, make sure you will be so attractive to pious brothers! Inshallah, who knows?

Maybe this move will be the one due to which Allah will bless you with a nice husband who will make you happy.

Find Your Hijab Style



Although hijab should be modest, there are many beautiful materials, colors, and styles.

You can wear the hijab that makes you feel good about yourself.

Check out YouTube; it offers super-nice hijab tips. (Just make sure you try those that still keep it modest.)

As you find yourself in other types of clothes and create your own unique style, look at the hijab the same way. Find your own style that you love.

Read Hijab Stories



I also recommend you read the stories of other sisters who decided to wear the veil to get inspired.

Read some of the converted sisters’ stories in particular and learn about how they struggled with their parents and environment to be able to get accepted with the hijab.

As I understood from your message, you are a born Muslim in a country that accepts hijab in public. Mashallah, it’s such a blessing!

How many sisters need to leave their country to do the same, subhanAllah? Get the courage by reading others’ stories inshallah; you will find some really powerful ones even on Aboutislam.net.

Some might not agree with me, but if it assists you, I believe you could take this wearing the hijab issue gradually.

This is what I also did: I used to wear it at the beginning only when I went to the sisters’ gathering and the mosque. I did this for months.

Eventually, I went to an interview with it, and when I got accepted, I decided I would continuously wear it from now on.

So if you feel it might be something that helps, wear it maybe once or twice when you go shopping or, obviously, to the mosque. Then eventually start wearing it permanently at other places as well.


You Have Free Will

You also mentioned you feared you might want to take it off. Well, technically speaking, you can always take it off. No one puts a gun to your head to do anything; it’s all your decision.

Your whole life is your own responsibility. So yes, you can always choose to take it off; it will be considered a sin, as you know, like any other sin such as smoking or drinking alcohol.

But it’s your decision, and only Allah knows your intentions. 

I personally know sisters who did this—they were married but then got divorced.

They were left alone with children, their husbands didn’t help them financially, they had no family, and their environment was not even Muslim-friendly, so they decided not to pressure themselves further and started working without hijab.

I am not saying it’s right, because really, when you keep Allah as your priority and do what He wants, He always but always helps you out. Remember the hadith:

“I am just as My slave thinks I am, (i.e. I am able to do for him what he thinks I can do for him) and I am with him if He remembers Me.”

But it can happen… However, do not think of this option, sister.

Do not even put it in your mind. Instead, remember, Allah is our ultimate helper in this life. Trust Him. Focus on the reason you wish to wear it. Inshallah, you will find the comfort and happiness you seek.

Be brave, sister; may Allah reward you!

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Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.

About Timea Aya Csányi
Timea Aya Csányi studied Psychology and Islamic Studies Bsc. at the International Online University. She is a certified NLP® Practitioner, one of our writers and counselors at the "Ask the Counselor" section. She has been the editor of the "Ask the Counselor" section for 10 years. Now she mainly works as a fitness trainer and journalist.