I have no Muslim friends. How to marry a Muslim girl in India? Would Muslim families accept a converted Muslim for marriage in India?
In this counseling answer:
• I believe the first step would be to make the intention to find a Muslim spouse, for the sake of Allah, to protect your faith and to create your future generations on the foundation of Islam, InshaAllah.
• The second step would be to let your intention about marrying a Muslim woman known to people – including your family.
• The first step to socializing and making Muslim friends can be by going to the mosque regularly.
• Contact Imams from various mosques and let them know about yourself and your intention of marrying a Muslim woman.
• Keep a strong connection with Allah, especially in this blessed month so that He helps you.
• I would also like to remind you to pray regularly for the guidance of your family so that they can also prosper and be successful in this world as well as in the Hereafter, InshaAllah.
• Allah tries and tests the believers. As a believer, you may find yourself in a difficult situation. However, do not let it sway you from faith.
Assalamu Alaikum Brother,
Thank you for your question. In your post, you have mentioned that you converted to Islam 5 years ago, MashaAllah! However, your family wants you to marry a Hindu girl. Obviously, you want to marry a Muslim.
However, you have mentioned that you do not have any Muslim friends. You have also raised a concern if a Muslim family would accept a converted Muslim for marriage with their daughter.
First, I would like to appreciate the strength of your faith. MashaAllah that you want to marry a Muslim girl. I understand that it must have been a tough journey for you. Having converted and living in a family that does not respect your values and boundaries.
The decision of marriage is a very sensitive one since in the subcontinent marriage is more of a family affair rather than an individual one. Therefore, it can lead to stress and battles. However, MashaAllah you are a mature person who understands the delicacy of marrying a Muslim woman.
In the Quran, Allah says,
“Do not marry idolatresses (al mushrikāt) till they believe; and certainly a believing maid is better than an idolatress even though she would please you; and do not marry idolaters (al Mushrikīn) till they believe (hata yūminū), and certainly a believing slave is better than an idolater, even though he would please you. These invite to the Fire, and Allah invites to the Garden and to forgiveness by His grace, and makes clear His revelations to mankind so that they may remember.” (Qur’an 2:221)
Establish Your Intention To Marry A Muslim Woman
Coming to your concern regarding how to find a Muslim wife, I believe the first step would be to make the intention to find a Muslim spouse, for the sake of Allah, to protect your faith and to create your future generations on the foundation of Islam, InshaAllah.
Once you have made the intention, InshaAllah, Allah will open up the path for you and make it easy for you to find a Muslim wife.
Let Your Intention Known To People
The second step would be to let your intention about marrying a Muslim woman known to people. This includes your family as well as other people in your community. Having told your family, it will make the path clear for you, as they will get the message and will stop bothering you to marry the Hindu girl.
According to a Hadith,
The Prophet Muhammad (SAW) said, “A woman is married for four (reasons): her wealth, noble ancestry, beauty and religion. Choose the religious woman lest your hand is stuck to dust (because of destitution).” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
Start Socializing With The Muslim Community
I understand that this is not always easy, but the first step to socializing and making Muslim friends can be by going to the mosque regularly. It will give you a chance to meet and greet people who pray at the mosque regularly, and in sometime, you will be able to open up with them.
Secondly, you can also start going to Muslim gatherings, lectures, khutba’s etc. In some mosques, there are also gatherings of learning after prayers. Attending those will not only boost your faith, but will also give you a chance to interact with Muslims. With time, you will be easy enough to let them know that you are a convert who is seeking to increase his faith, as well as looking for a Muslim spouse.
The Muslims you will find in such communities will definitely be supportive of you and will help you become a better practicing Muslim. They will also help you find a spouse.
Check out this counseling video
Another way could be to contact Imams from various mosques and let them know about yourself and your intention of marrying a Muslim woman. The imams usually have a big social circle of Muslim community and they can help you with the endeavor.
Ask Allah SWT for Guidance and Mercy
Brother, as you know, this is the Holy Month of Ramadan. Allah decrees his choicest blessings and mercy during this month on the believers. Be mindful of your worshipping; pray five times a day, keep fasts, give charity to the poor, read and learn the Quran. By the grace of God, InshaAllah, Allah will bless you endlessly in this world and in the Hereafter. He will listen to all your du’aa’s and prayers.
I would also like to remind you to pray regularly for the guidance of your family so that they can also prosper and be successful in this world as well as in the Hereafter, InshaAllah.
Allah SWT Tests His Believers
Brother, I would also like to remind you that Allah tries and tests the believers. As a believer, you may find yourself in a difficult situation. However, do not let it sway you from faith. In the Quran, Allah SWT says,
“And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient” [2:155]
In another place He says,
“O mankind, indeed the promise of Allah is truth, so let not the worldly life delude you and be not deceived about Allah by the Deceiver.” [35:5]
Lastly, I would just like to add that while it may be a challenge for you to find a Muslim spouse, being a convert. Hoever, nothing is difficult for Allah. Just place your trust in Him and seek help from fellow Muslim men. Insha Allah, Allah will help you.
Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.