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My Daughter is Scared of Eid al-Adha Slaughtering

Questioner

Anonymous

Reply Date

Aug 10, 2019

Question

Salam Aleikom sister Hannah. I live in a Muslim country where animals on Eid al-Adha are slaughtered on the streets, everywhere. This actually scares my child who is 6 years old. She dislikes this holiday a lot. How to make her love it?

Counselor

Answer


My Daughter is Scared of Eid al-Adha Slaughtering

 In this counseling answer:

•Engage her in the fun activities at home related to Eid. Furthermore, going beyond the slaughter and explaining how we give the meat to the poor and needy can also turn a negative experience into a positive one.

•Work on building a positive association with Eid. You can make decorations for the house. Allow her to take some control and make paintings and flags to decorate the house.

•Allow her to take some control and make paintings and flags to decorate the house. Let her lead the fun experience of Eid within the household to make it an occasion that she will look forward to each year.


Wa ’Alaikum Salaam wa Rahmatullah wa Barakatuh,

Firstly, I wish you an Eid Mubarak in advance. Alhamdulillah, you live in a Muslim country where your child is exposed to Islam on a regular basis. However, this also means that she is exposed to things that, at the age of 6, she finds unpleasant such as the slaughtering of animals for Eid.

Understandably, at this young age, this has gone on to create a negative association with Eid. She sees animals being killed on this special day.Ultimately, this makes her dislike the day altogether which is unfortunate as it is one of the 2 special days in our calendar to rejoice, celebrate and be happy.

There are some things that you can do to try and make the experience more enjoyable for her. Although understand that you will need patience as it might take time to change her mind as at the moment she is associating Eid with killing animals.

Firstly, engage her in the fun activities at home related to Eid. There are many online resources, printable activity packs that she can do at home to have fun doing Eid related activities. Work on building a positive association with Eid. You can make decorations for the house. Allow her to take some control and make paintings and flags to decorate the house. Let her lead the fun experience of Eid within the household to make it an occasion that she will look forward to each year.


Check out this counseling answer:


However, it is also an obligation to slaughter for Eid, so we cannot hide this from our children. Sheltering her from this and not exposing her to it entirely can be unhelpful also. So, it is necessary for her to be exposed to this, but it can be done in such a way that makes it less scary and more positive.

Firstly, educate her why we slaughter for this Eid. Naturally, if she doesn’t know why, then to see animals being randomly killed on the streets will be traumatic.Having an understanding of why can lessen the impact of this.

Furthermore, going beyond the slaughter and explaining how we give the meat to the poor and needy can also turn a negative experience into a positive one. She becomes aware that good can come out of this seemingly cruel act. To strengthen this aspect further, you might cook this meat with her and go with her to give it to the poor so that she can see the value of killing these animals also for the good of feeding those who do not have food to eat.

Let her be fully involved in this process so that she can experience the joy of feeding a poor people with the meat that she has just seen the slaughter. Let her feel the reward of having cooked the food and made the lives of those who do not have more comfortable. This will help to further strengthen her positive associations with this special occasion.

May Allah (swt) was the concerns of your daughter and grant you and your family a blessed Eid.

Amen,

***

Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.

Read more:

`Eid Al-Adha: A Model for Sharing and Caring

How Prophet Muhammad Celebrated Eid Al-Adha




About Hannah Morris

Hannah Morris is a mum of 4 and she currently works as Counsellor and Instructor of BSc. Psychology at the Islamic Online University (IOU). She obtained her MA degree in Psychology and has over 10 years of experience working in health and social care settings in the UK, USA, and Ireland. Check out her personal Facebook page, ActiveMindCare, that promotes psychological well-being in the Ummah. (www.facebook.com/activemindcare)

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