Answer
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
In this fatwa:
Islam considers causing pain or harm to a spouse during intimacy a major sin because all forms of abuse violate the Quranic command to “live with them in kindness” and contradict the Prophet’s teachings on mercy. Inflicting harm, coercion, or cruelty is strictly forbidden and damages the trust and dignity central to marriage.
Responding to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and an Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:
Islam strictly forbids any form of harm in marriage. Physical, emotional, or sexual abuse—including coercion or forced intercourse—is considered haram and a major sin.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) emphasized the importance of kindness, stating, “The best of you are those who are best to their wives” (At-Tirmidhi), and warned, “Do not strike the female servants of Allah” (Abu Dawud). The Quran advises, “Live with them in kindness.” (An-Nisa 4:19)
Marriage, as Allah states in the Qur’an, should be rooted in mercy, love, and trust, not control or domination. There is no room for inflicting harm on either spouse.
Therefore, sexual violence represents a profound breach of trust, and leadership does not justify cruelty. Such actions, if not stopped, warrant separation, divorce, and legal consequences. True repentance involves ending the abuse, seeking Allah’s forgiveness, asking the spouse for pardon, making amends, and promising never to repeat harmful behavior.
Islam commands us to protect the victims of abuse. It prioritizes safety and encourages seeking help from trusted family, friends, community leaders, professionals, or legal authorities if needed. Every spouse’s dignity is sacred to Allah. The Prophet (peace be upon him) taught that the most faithful believers are those with excellent character—harming a spouse undermines faith, while caring for and protecting them reflects the Sunnah.
Explore related Islamic rulings on marital rights and ethical conduct.
- Does the Quran Permit Domestic Violence Between Spouses?
- Is Oral Sex Haram in Islam?
- Can Muslim Married Couple Watch Porn?
- Can Husband Force Wife for Physical Relationship in Islam?
- My Husband Doesn’t Satisfy Me Sexually; What Should I Do?
Almighty Allah knows best.