Answer
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
In this fatwa:
In Islam, it is haram for a woman to ask a married man to divorce his wife in order to marry her. The Prophet (peace be upon him) clearly forbade this in an authentic Hadith, emphasizing that no one should seek to replace her Muslim sister by causing harm. While second marriages are permitted, demanding a divorce as a condition is sinful.
Responding to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and an Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:
Making divorce a precondition for your marriage is entirely sinful.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) warned against it as he said, “It is not permissible for a woman to ask for her (Muslim) sister’s divorce so she can take her place; she will only have what has been decreed for her.” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
“Sister” here means another Muslim woman.
Why is it wrong for a woman to ask for Muslim sister’s divorce so she can take her place?
This is because:
- It interferes with an existing marriage and can harm a family.
- It contradicts the spirit of sisterhood and fairness.
- It seeks to gain pleasure through another woman’s loss.
If, however, there are genuine marital problems, such as abuse, neglect, or infidelity, one may advise or express concern respectfully.
The decision remains entirely with the husband, and it is essential to remember that no ultimatums are given. This respect for the husband’s decision is a key aspect of Islamic marriage.
To conclude, remember, you may either accept being a second wife (where lawful and just) or decline the proposal. However, you may not demand the first wife’s divorce as the price of marriage. This is not just a personal opinion, but a ruling upheld by classical and contemporary scholars across the major schools of thought in Islam.
👉 Read more on second marriages:
- Am I Required to Reveal a Prior Divorce to a Suitor?
- Second Wife against Parents’ Will: Disobedient?
- No Longer Sharing Marital Bed: Can I Take a Second Wife?
- Stipulating Not to Take Second Wife in Marriage Contract: Valid?
- Having a Second Wife in Western Countries
Almighty Allah knows best.