Wa `alaykum As-Salamu waRahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
In this fatwa:
1- It is not allowed for anyone to wish for death because of some harm, hardship or difficulty that has come to him.
2- One should have patience and expect a reward from Allah for what he is passing through.
3- The one who is afflicted with any affliction should know that those afflictions expiate some of the sins that he has committed.
The late prominent Saudi Muslim scholar, Sheikh Ibn `Uthaymeen, stated:
When a person wishes for death because of something that has afflicted him, he is doing something that the Prophet (peace be upon him) has prohibited. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said,
“Let not one of you wish for death because of a misfortune which befalls him. If he cannot help doing so, he should say: ‘O Allah, keep me alive as long as You know that life is better for me, and make me die when death is better for me.” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)
Therefore, it is not allowed for anyone to wish for death because of some harm, hardship or difficulty that has come to him. In fact, he should have patience and expect a reward from Allah for what he is passing through. He should also wait for relief to come, as the Prophet (peace be upon him) has said,
“… know that victory comes with patience, relief with distress and ease with hardship.” (Ahmad)
The one who is afflicted with any affliction should know that those afflictions expiate some of the sins that he has committed.
No believer is afflicted with any kind of worry, grief or pain except that Allah expiates sins for him due to that, even the pricking of a thorn.
When the person has patience and expects rewards from Allah, he reaches the stage of being among the patient. This stage is a very elevated stage. Allah has stated about its inhabitants,
“And give glad tidings to the patient. Who, when afflicted with calamity, say, ‘Truly, to Allah we belong and, truly, to Him we shall return”‘ (Al-Baqarah 2:155-156)
The woman in the question feels that there is no solution for her problems except death. I believe that this is a mistaken view. Death does not solve any problems. In fact, the situation of adversity may get even worse.
How many humans die while being afflicted with pain and problems but they had been wronging themselves and did not give their sins and repent to Allah. Then his death is just a quicker coming of his punishment. If he remained alive, perhaps Allah would have guide him to repentance, seeking forgiveness, patience, facing the problem and expecting relief. This all would have been good for him.
Therefore, you must be patient and expect relief from Allah. Allah says in His book,
“So, verily, with the hardship there is relief. Verily, with the hardship, there is relief.” (Al-Sharh 94:5-6)
Almighty Allah knows best.
Source: Islamic Fatawa Regarding Women, Compiled by Muhammad Ibn Abdul-Aziz Al-Musnad and translated by Jamal Al-Din Zarabozo, Darussalam, 1996.