Wa `alaykum as-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
Dear sister, may Allah Almighty protect you from every fear and may He grant you tranquility of the heart and peace of the mind.
First of all, it is necessary to stress that death is the inevitable end of every living creature. As Muslims, we must recognize that all of us are born and will die and that the importance and significance of this lies in our beliefs and in how we live and die.
We know this not only from our own experience, but also from the Words of Allah and His Prophet. The Muslim is supposed to realize that death is simply a passage from this life to the next, life.
Allah Almighty says, “Every soul will taste of death. And ye will be paid on the Day of Resurrection only that which ye have fairly earned. Whoso is removed from the Fire and is made to enter Paradise, he indeed is triumphant. The life of this world is but comfort of illusion.” (Al `Imran 3:185)
Thus, a Muslim is supposed to welcome death as a release from this transitory life. When we see death, we ought to be neither afraid nor saddened by it. We can miss those who precede us, but we should not be disheartened by the death of someone close to us. If they are Muslims, we know that Paradise will eventually be their abode as ours, and we will meet again, in sha’ Allah.
Commenting on whether or not one can see his relatives after death, Sheikh `Abdur-rahman Al-Barak, the prominent Saudi scholar, states,
When a person dies, he moves from this world to another realm, and his soul does not come back to his family and they do not feel anything of him. Similarly the dead person does not know anything about the circumstances of his family because he is absent from them, in a state of bliss or torment.
With regard to dreams, some of them are true and some are from Satan. The living may come to know something of the circumstances of the dead via true dreams or visions, but that depends on the sincerity of the one who sees the dream, whether the dream is a true dream and the ability of the one who interprets these dreams.
Yet despite that, we should not be certain of what the dream says, unless there is some evidence to indicate that. For a living person may see his deceased relative in a dream, advising him to do things or saying some things to him which he may know are true if they match reality.
There have been some cases in which dreams matched reality and others where there is no evidence to suggest that the dreams are true. And some dreams are known to be untrue. Thus, we must pay attention to that when we deal with news, reports and stories that have to do with the circumstances of the dead.
Moreover, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states,
The best solace for believers is the Book of Allah. Try to get a copy of an excellent recorded Qur’an and play the tapes always and listen to them as much as possible.
Surely, the Qur’an, which is the Word of Allah, is going to soothe your heart, appease you and provide you with tranquility and peace. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “When the Qur’an is melodiously recited, Allah’s sakina (tranquility) will descend upon our hearts, and the angels will envelop us in Divine Mercy.” (Abu Dawud)
You may also recite the following supplications:
Laillah illa Allah al azeem al haleem. Laillah illa Allah rabbi el -`arsh al azeem. Laillah illa Allah rabbi es-samawat wa rabbil ‘ard rabbil `arshil kareem. Allahumma rahmataka arju fala takilni ila nafsi tarfata `ain wa ‘aslih li sha’ni kullahu. Laillah illa anta.
(There is no god but Allah, the Great and the Clement. There is no god but Allah, Lord of the Mighty Throne. There is no god but Allah, Lord of the Heavens and Lord of the Earth, Lord of the Noble Throne. O Allah! I invoke Your Mercy, do not abandon me to my own devices, even for an instance, straighten out all my affairs for me, there is no god but You.)
Allah Almighty knows best.