Answer
Answer:
Wa ‘Alaikum Salaam,
Ma sha’ Allah, if you have made a proposal and she has accepted, then this is great news. May Allah (swt) bless your union, and may you find comfort in your love for each other.
Regarding telling her such a thing, it would be quite an inappropriate thing to talk about with someone before you are even married, so I wouldn’t recommend. But this is ultimately a choice for you to consider yourself.
There are many other things to keep in mind, too. Firstly, a man is not married for this reason. What is more important is his righteousness and piety, whether he will be a good husband and father to any future children should Allah (swt) bless you with them. A righteous husband should be a far more favourable quality to a wife than the size of his manhood.
Furthermore, when it comes to the actual intimate relations, a sense of closeness and love, again, would in most cases weigh more importantly than your size. Keep in mind as well that it is not likely she has seen enough to know what the difference between big and small even is, so she may not even see it in this way. So you don’t have any need to worry, anyway.
If it comes to be an issue, then there are ways and means to work around this. Focusing on this right now, however, will only increase your focus on the issue further and decrease your confidence. Therefore, it is important to think of other more important things aside from this.
In your case, it seems this is having a big impact on your confidence; therefore, it is advisable that you work on increasing your confidence away from the focus on the size of your manhood. Set yourself goals that you can realistically achieve, whether this be with a work based task or a hobby. This sense of accomplishment that you will attain upon achieving these goals will work to improve your self-esteem and self-confidence.
Work on increasing your knowledge of Islam and finding confidence in this. Increase your relations with Allah (swt) and findi comfort and confidence in this. Work on improving the qualities that are most favourable to a potential wife such as righteousness and piety.
Once you become confident in all such other matters, those that are most attractive to a potential spouse, in sha’ Allah, your confidence will increase such that you will no longer feel the need to focus or be concerned about the less important matters.
May Allah (swt) grant you a righteous spouse who will bring happiness and contentment in your life.
Salam,
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