In this counseling answer:
•I’m wondering if you suffer from depression, if you have a history of trauma or abuse in your life, or if there are other reasons why you are thinking in this way.
•If you feel any suicidal ideation, please do call the suicide hotline in your country or go to the nearest emergency room.
•One cannot ask Allah or pray to Allah for death. Only Allah knows when our time of death is. It is pre-written by Allah.
•I highly recommend that you seek out counseling on a regular basis to resolve what may be depression, based on your wish for death.
•Please, honor Allah and your life by living up to your full potential.
As Salamu Alaykum brother,
Thank you for writing to us. Brother, as I understand, you have failed your simulation exams many times in the past. You stated that you have the last simulation and a key to enter A levels, and without it you’ll have to wait another year.
Brother, you indicated the problem is that you have not studied very well. You now feel bad that you haven’t studied. The problem is not that you’re not smart enough to pass. I’m sure you’re very intelligent. The problem is that you don’t apply yourself and, therefore, you suffer the consequences. I guess I’m wondering why you’re not studying.
Your question is even more alarming because you want to know how to get anything you want from God – even self-death.
Brother, I’m wondering if you suffer from depression, if you have a history of trauma or abuse in your life, or if there are other reasons why you are thinking in this way. Have you had previous suicide attempts? Do you have a plan commit suicide? I strongly recommend brother that you seek counseling for your desires and wishes to die.
Asking for Death
While you did not specify suicide, I did need to ask those questions and have you think about things more clearly. If you feel any suicidal ideation, please do call the suicide hotline in your country or go to the nearest emergency room.
I kindly suggest that you speak with somebody that you’re close to about what you feel. I also want you to make a promise, which is a written contract to yourself that you will not harm yourself.
As you know, brother, suicide is a sin. As you are a good Muslim and you love Allah, I hope that you will honor that. One cannot ask Allah or pray to Allah for death. Only Allah knows when our time of death is. It is pre-written by Allah.
Tired of Living
Brother, everybody goes through times when they’re tired of living. We all have bad memories and negative things happen to us. However, most of the time we don’t wish for death. We wish to improve our circumstances.
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Allah says He won’t help a people unless they help themselves. I kindly ask you, have you really helped yourself? Have you put all your efforts into studying? Have you put efforts into resolving the situations that you’re tired of living with?
Brother, you’re only 19 years old. You have a whole wonderful life ahead of you. To just give up now and wish for death is kind of like saying Allah made a mistake when He created you, which he did not do. Allah does not make mistakes. We all go through tests and trials in this life. This is a test and a trial that you are going through. I am confident that you will see the wisdom in the lessons learned from these tests and trials and you will come through them stronger.
Allah Created you with Love
There’s a saying that “life is what we make it”. This is true to a degree. For instance, we can either choose to study for an exam and do well, or we can choose not to. We can choose to remain depressed and sad and tired, or we can seek out counseling to resolve our feelings. We do have choices.
You seem like a very smart young man who is a very pious Muslim. You sound very overwhelmed right now, however, and I am concerned.
Brother, things in your life will get better. As your question was very brief I’m not sure exactly what you have been going through or what you’ve been through. All I know is that you are taking exams and you’re not passing them because you’re not studying.
It’s a simple solution really, regarding the exams. If you fail this one, you just have to study for the next one. You will have a whole year to do so. During this year, you may perhaps want to improve upon your study habits.
I highly recommend that you seek out counseling on a regular basis to resolve what may be depression, based on your wish for death. Please do get counseling, brother, as well as draw closer to Allah. Allah loves you very much. He wants you to succeed. Allah wants you to be happy and to have a good life. He gave you this life. You are a special, unique human being that Allah created with love.
Please, honor Allah and your life by living up to your full potential. There is nothing in this life that you cannot overcome if you try. I am confident that you can.
Please let us know how you are doing,
Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.