As-Salaamu ‘alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu,
SubhanaLah. I feel your pain! First and foremost ask Allah for help!
In America, you can report child abuse, can you do that in Turkey? Or, do you not want to do that. I don’t like to do it in America because the system is abusive, so, sometimes it is from the frying pain into the fire instead of help.
Also, you live in Muslim country, are there no groups/social service organizations (non-profit orgs) run by Muslims that have it as their service to intervene in cases like this where a child and an elderly person are being abused (without getting the authorities involved)?
Even though you are not a therapist, you can start reading about how psychology works. But, in this case, that is not what you need exactly. You need to get your aunt and her granddaughter out from under the oppression!Then you can help them recovery by helping them understand the psychology of both life and Allah’s plan (i.e., why He created pain and suffering, to test us and help us learn and grow, and as a struggle that, when we overcome it, we can earn Jannah)
As far as your Aunt’s needs go, that is a hard one because she is an adult and has to make her own choices, where she can (I know that she does not have her own money so may be stuck, she may just have to deal with her lot). However, the child needs to be protected, inShaAllah. Can you try educating the mother first about the right way to parent, that children learn when in an environment that is loving and encouraging? Hate and abuse never made for permanent healthy growth, as you pointed out, she is already showing signs of anxiety, etc.
Ask Allah, and keep asking Allah to send help!
If the suffering cannot be relieved, or at least not anytime soon, in the Quran, Allah Says that, when we feel traumatized, very scared, or extremely sad, or the like, we should deal with it by saying “inna li lahi wa inna ilaihi ra jee un” (From Allah we come and to Allah we will return). Thikering this helps the believer see life in its true context, as part of the whole of it, which includes the next life too. That one short sentence references the beginning and the end of life, thereby referencing the essence of life, that life is for the next, not this one.
I know that this may not feel like help but the way you painted the situation, it seems as if there are not solutions except internal ones – for your aunt. Again, I must urge you to take action to protect the child. I know this may cause problems in your family but you have to decide what is more important, this poor child’s life or you dealing with problems in your family!
May Allah Make it easy for you.
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