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Can We Celebrate Our Wedding Anniversary?

16 July, 2017
Q Salaam. I was married just a year ago and as my anniversary is coming in a few weeks, I really want to have a great time with my husband to mark this special night. He has indicated that he also has plans to do something nice as a gift for me, too. But my sister told me today that this is haraam. How? How can celebrating our love be something God doesn't want? She said it's because I am "imitating the kuffaar" but I really don't understand.

Answer

Asalamu Alaikum,

Thank you for contacting About Islam with your question. Dr. Yasir Qadhi addresses this question in the video below:

Transcript:

Dr. Yasir Qadhi:

“We have been way too strict with our religion and a lot of times and we have made life so impossible and so unrealistic by preaching that anniversaries are biddah and haraam (forbidden).

This is honestly very, very strict and foolish, and I have to be very blunt here.

There’s nothing wrong with this. It’s a cultural thing. Anybody who says this is haraam… well then we’re speaking in English, wearing pants and shirts, living in Canada… everything becomes haraam, right?

Imitating the kuffar is haraam when you imitate something that is uniquely kufr.

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So wearing the cross is imitating the kuffar. Wearing the clothing of a pastor—which is the white collar—this is haraam, all right? Celebrating Christmas is imitating the kuffar. This is haraam.

As for speaking their language, as for wearing pants and a shirt, as for their general customs and culture…

Guys I’m going to have a halal hamburger for lunch. That’s what the brothers have promised me… but am I imitating the kuffar when I like a hamburger? Not ham hamburger! A beef hamburger, right? So it’s a hundred percent certified halal.

Am I imitating the kuffar if I like a hamburger for lunch? You tell me.

We have gone so strict in this regard that all these certain things have become biddah and haraam.

There is nothing wrong with celebrating a personal anniversary!

How can the Sharia say that a husband taking his wife out on a romantic dinner on their 15th anniversary [or] their fifth anniversary… candlelight dinner, beautiful restaurant, nice halaal zabiha food or seafood…

And then, you know, telling her, “I’ll do it all over again, honey!”—even if he doesn’t mean it, it doesn’t matter but he’s allowed to lie in this regard, okay—how can this be haraam when you’re bringing so much love to your family?

This is what a wife wants. She wants this love, she wants this attention; she wants to be told that the passion is still there.

And the husband… these are the days that he can show this… guys, it’s only one day of the year, man! Just do it, do you know what I’m saying?

So for us to come and say, “Oh it just haraam to celebrate wedding anniversaries”, Subhanallah (praise God!)!

On what basis are you making this haraam? Which ayah (chapter from Quran)? Which hadith?

Let me ask you: is it haraam to bring flowers home to your wife on any day of the year? No? Now, did the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) every bring flowers for his wives? Why? It wasn’t their culture!

Are you gonna say it’s haraam because the Prophet didn’t do it? Because the sahaba didn’t do it? They didn’t have roses in Madina! It wasn’t their culture to bring these types of things.

In our culture […] go buy some beautiful bouquet of flowers and surprise your wife and see how happy your wife becomes. She’s gonna be so excited, SubhanAllah!

Isn’t this what the Sharia wants? That husbands and wives have a good relationship? When the family is solid, society is solid.

Sisters, you gotta reciprocate, by the way. It’s a two-way street!


I hope this helps answer your question.

You can also check out more from Dr. Yasir Qadhi at the link here 

Please keep in touch.

Walaikum Asalam.


Please continue feeding your curiosity, and find more info in the following links:

Moments of Married Love… The Untold Story

 

For a Happy Marriage Life Follow These 9 Tips

 

Marriage for Young Muslims: Making a Place of Love

 

 

About Dr. Yasir Qadhi
Yasir Qadhi was born in Houston, Texas and completed his primary and secondary education in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia. He graduated with a B.Sc. in Chemical Engineering from the University of Houston, after which he was accepted as a student at the Islamic University of Madinah. After completing a diploma in Arabic, he graduated with a B.A. from the College of Hadith and Islamic Sciences. Thereafter, he completed a M.A. in Islamic Theology from the College of Dawah, after which he returned to America and completed his doctorate, in Religious Studies, from Yale University.Currently he is the Dean of al-Maghrib Institute, the Resident Scholar of the Memphis Islamic Center, and a professor at Rhodes College, in Memphis, TN.