Answer
Answer:
As-Salamu ‘Alaikum Sister,
Thank you for sending us your question. I ask Allah (swt) to bless your marriage and to strengthen the bond between you and your husband.
Sister, after reading your question, it is a little difficult to understand that you and your current husband were engaged for two years and never had any kind of contact with each other. What made you agree to marry your husband in the first place?
It is not haraam to get to know one another during the engagement period as long as the both of you are not in complete seclusion with one another, but it doesn’t seem like either one of you reached out to the other during this time.
It is obvious from your question that you are frustrated from your husband’s lack of communication with you, and certainly any spouse in your position would be. Certainly, the ideal situation for any married couple is that they both have a close bond, and if that isn’t the case, then something needs to change.
My advice to you would be for you to reach out to your husband and contact him. Don’t wait for him to contact you because your frustration will continue to build and will cause you avoidable pain and anxiety. Share with him your feelings about being married to him and what your expectations and hopes are from this marriage.
You mentioned that you don’t know anything about his personality, and the only way you can get to know him is through interaction, at least first through speaking on the phone, chatting online, and constantly being in contact with each other.
It seems like your husband lives in a different country than you do, which makes things difficult for the both of you to bond. Nevertheless, continue to reach out to him and tell him also that you would like for him to contact you and to stay in touch. Is there a plan that the both of you be reunited (in which the both of you eventually live together)?
In the meantime, try to make a difficult situation easier by keeping contact with each other. It is completely healthy and normal for a wife to ask about her husband and a husband to ask about his wife.
I ask Allah (swt) to grant you a happy marriage and success.
Salam,
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