Children

Q:

Assalamu alaykum. 

My husband had me do abortion with emotional abuse. Threatening me with different things.

He doesn’t want more than 2 children and I do want . He said to me it is my right to use birth control .

What does islam say about this and what can I do

A:

Wa `alaykum As-Salamu waRahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

Abortion is haram and is considered a major sin in Islam. The degree and intensity of the crime increases as pregnancy advances. Once the ensoulment has taken place, it is no different than killing another human being; so, it is like a coldblooded murder. If you have done it, you ought to repent and expiate for the crime

If, however, it was before the ensoulment, then also it is a sin unless warranted by circumstances.

For details on this, let me cite one of my earlier answers:

Abortion or termination of pregnancy is generally considered abominable, and therefore as Haraam since it involves interfering with life-process once it has started. There are, however, differences of opinion about the permissibility of abortion in special circumstances depending on the stage or stages of pregnancy.

1) There is a unanimous consensus among scholars that abortion is considered as absolutely forbidden after twelve weeks of conception (i.e. one hundred and twelve days); this is the point when ensoulment (breathing of soul into the embryo) takes place. To abort pregnancy from this point onwards is akin to committing infanticide, which has been condemned in the Qur’an. Scholars, however, have made a single exception to this rule: If continuation of pregnancy and carrying it through full term proves to be risking mother’s life, abortion shall be considered as permissible.

2) Abortion after the expiry of the first forty days of conception is considered as Haraam except in the following exceptional cases: 1) If carrying the pregnancy to the full term exposes the mother to unbearable health problems during or after delivery; 2) if, as determined by the reliable medical practitioners, the child shall be borne with such physical and mental deformity as would deprive him/her a normal life. This decision must be based on the opinion of at least two reliable medical experts in the field.

3) While many scholars consider abortion before expiry of the first forty days of conception as Haraam, a number of them, however, consider it as either permissible or at least not as Haraam.

In conclusion, as Imam Ghazzali has observed, one is discouraged from tampering with the life-process once it has started; the intensity of sin, however, varies according to how advanced the pregnancy is. Thus while it may be considered as less sinful in the very early days, it is considered as absolutely haraam after the ensoulment.”

Now coming to your husband’s demand, you may resort to family planning that is safe by consulting your gynecologist. If you and husband want to resort to it through mutual consent, that is fine in sharia. However, aborting a pregnancy is never a valid option to please your husband. As a conscientious Muslim, he should never insist on that. He also ought to turn to Allah in sincere repentance for the grave sin he has committed and has forced you. I pray to Allah to inspire us to turn to Him in repentance. Here is a Du’a to read:

Allahumma ighfir lee dhanbee kullahu diqqahu wajillahu wa sirrahu wa alaniyyathahu wa awwalahu wa aakhirahu wa maa alithu minhu wamaa lam a’lam

(O Allah, forgive me all of my sins: the major and the minor; the the private and the public; the first and the last, and that which I am aware of and that which I am not aware of).

Almighty Allah Knows best.

Thursday, Jan. 01, 1970 | 00:00 - 00:00 GMT

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