Question about marriage.

Q:

I love a girl so much and she also love me. We are practising Islam very well and faithfully. But, by mistake we involved a relationship. We can’t come back from the relationship never. No way. We tried to finish the relationship but didn’t.
This situation we decide that we get marriage because we are adult. But parents are not agreed with us now because of now we are building our careers. They will give marry us after some years.
So, if we will marry by ourselves without informed our parents for avoid sin and our relationship is to be halal. Then, is the marriage done or correct or legal? Is Islam approve our marriage and accept us a legal couple?

A:

If you cannot guard yourself against fornication, you should get married. Before doing that, you ought to repent of your sins and turn to Allah seeking forgiveness. Once you have sincerely repented, you can marry her proper way, using both legal and Islamic methods

Try to convince your parents by making them aware of the seriousness of the matter. Perhaps you may be able to persuade them by using an Imam or wise person in the community.

If they still do not agree, then you may get married, but you should do so legally and not as a secret affair.

There is no room in Islam for secret marriage.

As for the requirements of marriage, I would copy here one of my earlier answers:

“The minimum conditions for the validity of nikah are the following: The consent of the guardian of the woman, presence of witnesses, offering and acceptance, and finally mahr (dower). Once the above conditions have been fulfilled, the marriage will be deemed as valid; but if these conditions are not fulfilled, then it will be considered as being null and void.

As far as the consent of guardian is concerned, it can only be dispensed with if the guardian is simply refusing to give consent for considerations other than Islamic, in which case the judge can authorize the marriage after having followed the due process. If, on the other hand, such is not the case and no attempt was made to ascertain the consent of the guardian, then such a marriage would be considered invalid and, therefore, unacceptable in Islam. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “There is no (valid) marriage without a guardian and two reliable witnesses.”

By stipulating the above-mentioned conditions for the validity of marriage, Islam insists that a marriage should remain distinct from other loose and immoral lifestyles such as fornication and illicit affairs. Hence, the Prophet insisted on making marriages public.

Based on what has been stated above, the concept of a marriage “just for both of you or for Allah” is not tolerated in Islam.

Society has a share in marriage in the sense that people should know that both of you are married so that they do not suspect you of maintaining an illicit relationship. According to the teachings of Islam, we are under obligation to do whatever we can to safeguard our religion, honor, and dignity; and as such we should stay away not only from that which is considered as strictly haram or forbidden but also from all that is doubtful and dubious. The Prophet (peace and blessings be him) said, “Whosoever shuns what is doubtful he has protected his religion and honor; but whosoever commits what is doubtful, he may inadvertently fall into haram!”

Allah Almighty knows best.

 

Thursday, Jan. 01, 1970 | 00:00 - 00:00 GMT

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