Sheikh Kifah Mustapha: Fatwas on Women Issues

Dear Brothers/Sisters,

 

Thank you very much for joining us in this Live Fatwa session. We would like also to thank our guest, Sheikh Kifah Mustapha, for answering the questions directed to him. You will find the answers of your questions below.

Saturday, Apr. 28, 2018 | 13:00 - 15:00 GMT

Session is over.

Assalamu alaikum shaikh. I'm describing a situation . I hope you will answer according to it. A woman wants to continue her job/work after her marriage . so she stipulated conditions about it & husband agreed. Then they are married & their child born. When children will be school-going age , is it must that mothers have to homeschooling their child in stead of sending schools? Can she choose to send her sons & daughters to school cause she wants to continue work & maximum children goes to school as it is norm & it is conventional education system. Please note that if child learn anything wrong from outside world ,mother will correct them. And she can maintain balance between family & career with husband's help in responsibilities of home & children cause they(husband & wife) mutually share it.



Wa `alaykum as-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

 

I am a believer that social interaction in regular school is very important for the wellbeing and growth of any child. Homeschooling might work for a certain period of time but in my view it is not the best choice for kids on the long term.

 

Talk to your husband and see if both can come on such understanding,

 

Allah Almighty knows best. 


Assalamu alaikum shaikh,during obligatory/voluntary fasting can women go outside house for job,study,shopping, going to relative's house,other purposes & talk with non mahram when situation arises as they would do when they were not fasting ? Is there any rulings that, even if they are allowed to go outside, they can stay limited hours outside home?



Wa `alaykum as-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

 

Yes, all what you have said as long as it is Halal it can be done when fasting or not. None of these will affect the validity of your fasting.

 

It is just preferable that people invest more time in acts of worship instead.

 

Allah Almighty knows best. 


I am pregnant Alhamdolillah with my first child . I will be in my 8th month of pregnancy this Ramadan InshaaAllah . I want to know what's the Islamic ruling for me to fast in pregnancy . I tried searching online but found different opinions a)to fast later b) to feed one poor per day of Ramadan c) both above options . I am niyat to feed my baby InshaaAllah for 2 years . I'm afraid I will miss Ramadan for consecutive 3 years . Please guide me



I believe that pregnant and nursing women do not need to fast or make up days. They can just pay the fidya only and it is sufficient.

 

Allah Almighty knows best. 


I have been married to my husband for 35 years. We are both religious people and had many good years. We lived in the US for the first 7 years then Kuwait for 15 years (but always planned to return to the US). My husband never forgave me for returning to the US and now treats me differently. He was ok for a while but when out children became teens and started getting into trouble he blamed me! He treats me like I'm not important, like what I have to say shouldn't be said, I have no say in any thing regarding our life together or our children. I worked for many years and supported more than half to the family but always gave it ALL to him. Now the children are grown and paying him to live in our house, I have a small disability income but he provides nothing. He goes to the mosque nightly and shopping almost nightly but it is a fight to get him to take me somewhere once a week now that I'm wearing hijab. NOW I FEEL ALL I GET FROM HIM IS A HARD TIME!! Would it be ungrateful to Allah (because I have never had to struggle) if I decided to divorce him because I feel he is mentally abusing me and his power as the man? He says it is not my business what he does and where he goes! I also believe that if I remove my hijab he would be more pleased with me!



When people end up in places they do not like it will be a life of frustration for them and people around them too. Negativity will always be a cloud over them and unless someone offers to ease such stress on them it will just grow bigger and worse.

 

The prophet (peace be upon him) mentioned the term (Ba’s) which means a sufficient reason as the reason for a woman seeking divorce and that she will not be blamed.

 

I suggest that you try counseling first if he refuses and things do not change, then you would have done your homework to keep the family together and after that if you seek divorce it will your decision.

 

Allah Almighty knows best. 


I am a student in Canada who needs to wake up for school at around 6:45 AM, but as we near the summer months, Isha starts far later into the night, as late as 11:45 PM. The problem is I need to go to sleep far earlier in order to get the needed amount of sleep for my age (at least 8 hours a night). I have read that combining Magrib and Isha is permissible if praying it on time would create difficulty. However, I do not know if my situation would count as "difficult" or is difficult enough to make it permissible. I cannot wake up before Fajr to pray Isha, so that isn't an option. Is it mandatory for me to sacrifice some hour/hours of sleep (which may not be healthy) in order to pray Isha on time? Thank you



If you do it few times then I can see your point but to make it a habit, no.

 

Unless you check with a doctor and he declares it as a medical condition that will cause you harm for such irregularity in sleeping patterns, then yes.
Allah Almighty knows best. 


Assalamu alaikum shaikh, it is encouraged in Islam to make dua/supplication . my question is about it. Women like to do study , having job/career, hobby of doing halal art & craft,reading books, doing online course , doing volunteering charity works, social works,teaching people(both men & women) about different skills & knowledge both online & real life,gain knowledge about different worldly subjects & things from various source from both online & real life, exercise,writing,stitching, embroidery, designing,making dress,making cards ,making things & all other creative,constructive,productive works. These things nurture her mind. These are positive for her mental health. These give her confidence & make her life meaningful. Can she supplicate to Allaah,so that He makes it easy for her doing these above mentioned things & makes her surrounding/environment positive for doing these whether she is unmarried or married & whether she is childless or not & in all situations of her life until death? Is it considered valid supplication?



Wa `alaykum as-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

 

Yes, of course it will be a great supplication. Any act that will add quality to the lifestyle of a person, male or female, you can make Dua for it as long as it is halal.

 

Allah Almighty knows best. 


Is exercising allowed In Islam for females for weight loss? If exercise makes us look younger,is it considered an unnatural method to look young?



Muslim women should always exercise to be in good shape and look good. Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) used to race with the prophet (peace be upon him).

If that will also make you feel better about yourself, look good and look good to your husband if married, then start practicing.

 

Allah Almighty knows best. 


Assalamu alaikum shaikh,if wife stipulated conditions prior to the marriage that, she will continue her job/work & husband agreed to that then she married him due to that. In that case , is husband obliged to provide their kids care during wife's work hours by keeping him/her in child care centres /nursery/day care centres / preschool centres/alike or allows reliable nanny/babysitter/housemaid/maid in his house for looking after kids or keeping the child to husband's mother/wife's mother/any reliable relatives in his house /wife's father's house /other suitable places or making any other arrangement for caring of the child? Nowadays there are many ways to give child proper care during mother's work hours, is husband obliged to do above mentioned things as he agreed to the condition of wife to continue her work?



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

If both are in total agreement, yes you can.

 

My concern though is how long the husband will tolerate that!

 

In my experience, such type of work will not stand with men for long and it will be a door for them to be flat about the relationship and start looking away complaining about such lifestyle, so keep that in mind.

 

Also remember, infants do not need just physical care, the need the emotional care that can only be delivered by the mother so I will be concerned if less time is spent with them from your side.

 

Dads or babysitters can never fill the shoes of mother in that perspective and that is why in Islam moms are held high as the path for heaven for their kids.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


If someone fails to wake up for tahajjud nawafil and hence misses the witr too. What is the most suitable time to offer the qazza of witr?



Anytime you wish after you wake up except when time of sunrise or just before Zhuhr in minutes or at time of sunset.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


Assalamu-Alaikum.I'm a religious girl who prays five times a day and reads the Quran.Um. But recently I've started to like someone. It was a friend and then when I realized I liked the person, I avoided all contact with him. And then he messaged me again... and again. And I eventually again started speaking to him.My question is this. I like talking to the person and although I like him, I don't want any relationship with him. And I won't ever go into a relationship either. Is messaging wrong? We don't meet at all to hang out or anything like that. He's just a writer and I like reading his words. Is this wrong? Is it wrong of me to talk to guys? Please tell me, I'm all sorts of confused.



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

You have to be careful. Good intentions do not allow wrong acts. Islam allowed people who are interested in each other to communicate based on a real move of responsibility. So if he is serious about you, ready to start a family, he should ask for your hand and during engagement you can talk freely as much as you want.

 

If it was just having good fun time it will be very soon going into flirting then you get more attached to him then he will demand favors intimate ones for sure than haram is growing bigger and bigger.

 

I suggest you take one hard step and quit and leave him with a choice of either come serious and knock our door or goodbye.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


Salam alaikym I want to ask regarding days of itikhaf in Ramadan. I am working so I cant do full 10 days itikhaf in last ten days of Ramadan but I am interested to do for 3 or 5 days. Kindly guide me if I can do like this and on which day of Ramadan I should start for 3 or 5 day itikhaf to avoid any mistakes. Although I have heard that 3-5 days are ok but wana confirm. Plus before I have done 3 days but eid fall on 3rd so couldn't complete 3 days as Ramadan of that year was 29 days .Therefore guide me on right days to start itikhaf for 3 and 5 days plus if one get period what should one do continue or stop. Thanks a lot



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

There are so many views on how long Itikaf can be. So you can do Itikaf even one day or half day if you wish.

 

I suggest you do it the last days of Ramadan with the night of Qadr included on the 27 for the great rewards in that night.

 

During their menses, women can read the Qur’an and make dhikr (remembrance of Allah) and du`a’ (supplication), though they are forbidden from fasting, performing prayer and touching the mushaf (copy of the Qur’an). In this way, they still have the opportunity to observe Laylat al-Qadr (the Night of Power) by reciting the Qur’an and making dhikr.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


Assalamu alaikum shaikh,we bought wifi device & use it now in our home. And we have to pay for it. We have password which is known by family members of house. My question, is using free internet by wifi device of own home permitted?



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

As long as you pay your fee and not using someone else’s wifi service that he did not allow, yes you can.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


Asalamu alaykumMy mother and father divorced over 30 years ago, I live with my mother, my father and mother don't get on at all as my father is very abusive, but he is nearly 80 and still stuck in his ways and is all alone but i want to look after him, i am lost at how to and seek advice, I too struggle to get on with him aswell but know it is my duty an i too one day will be old, please advise.



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh
This can be done in many forms. You can either visit him at home or care for him at certain times. Hire someone to care for his medical needs or cleaning house or making food etc.

 

Sometimes you can help financially.

 

But make sure at least to keep visiting him if you cannot be with him always.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

 


I accepted islam a month ago... and i am married for 11 years... What shall i do if i cant convince my husband to accept islam as i do? I love him so much and i dont want to have any argue with him



We would like to congratulate you for choosing Islam and becoming Muslim.

 

Scholars have many views on that. I lean toward the view that was adopted by European Iftaa’ Council. You stay with him especially after 11 years of marriage and kids in the intention to introduce Islam to him. If practicing Islam becomes an issue for him like he does not want you to pray, fast, put Hijab etc or he starts making fun of your faith or mock you because of that, then that matter will give you a hint of speeding the process of separating from him.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


if 3 times u perform washing any part and feel that a little part is remained dry then should i take water and wash the dry portion on face for example ....or perform wudu again as 4 times washing is not allowedWhat shall i do?



For Wudu to be valid it does not matter how many times you will wash. You must bring water to all parts of Wudu required or your Salat will not be valid.

 

Ty to reach water to all areas in the first 3 times, but if needed to add more in places you missed, it should be fine.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


Asaare Muslims ok to where Pierre Cardin sweaters etc as he is gay person and all the clothes have his name on themJzk



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

Clothes or beauty supplies are normal materials and can be enjoyed regardless of who makes them as long as the outfit itself or the substance is Halal.

 

Now if one is gay or plays poker or whatever, it is not our duty to declare regular matters Haram on us.

 

Only in cases that there was a boycott move that will serve a purpose in case of company discriminated against Muslims or so, then it will be fine.

 

But personal acts of sin do not declare normal material Haram on us.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

 


Salam Alaykum Please I will like Shaykh to explain the legal effect of a subsequent marriage without formal dissolution of the first marriage.Is second marriage valid or null and void having regard to the fact the second marriage was contracted after the parties had lived separately for some years?



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

In Islam, it is permissible to take a second wife without divorce from first one. The first wife herself at that moment has the right to say I cannot tolerate to be with another woman and can ask for divorce. So the man has to make a choice, would he take a new wife with a chance of losing the first one?

Only if you are living in countries or States that prohibit second marriages that you need to think of legal consequences of that matter.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


Assalamu alaicoum! Is it permitted to do eyelashes laminating with ceratin and eyebrow microblading? Thank you.



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

There are two general codes in Islam that regulate any beautification changes. It should not change your God given physical appearance nor it should cause harm.

 

Only exempted from that are medical conditions or birth defects.

 

For example, if one was born with very light eye brow or lashes that makes their appearance weird or if one had an accident like burning or such, then yes it can be used to bring it back to normal human appearance.

 

But if the purpose behind it was just mere beautification with no real need for it, I do not see it permissible. Some cleaning of the eyebrow is allowed but not changing shape regardless of methods used.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

 


Assalamu alaicoum! Is it a sin if a non-fasting person is eating in front of a fasting one?



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

No it is not, In some places, people just do it out of respect only.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.


Asak My wife and I had some major issues and I was left with no option but to file for legal divorce and child custody. Our legal divorce is still pending but we have a custody order. After over a year of marriage counseling we have decided to reconcile. To protect the custody order we would like to keep my original divorce with custody case pending. Our understanding is since my intention was to give her only one divorce and iddaat time is over, we may reconcile after a new Nikkah and Mahr. Is there any issue in doing a new nikkah if we still want to keep the original divorce and custody case pending to protect the custody order from expiring while we give reconciliation another try.



Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh

 

If legal divorce is not final yet, and you did not divorce her the Sharia`ah way, then she is still your wife.

 

This also will depend on the type of legal divorce you spoke about. Intentions alone do not define marriage and life liabilities toward each other as spouses.

 

Many Muslims who live in non-Islamic countries need the legal law to protect their rights.

 

Any legal divorce (that will prevent spouses from detailed rights, during marriage or in case of death of any spouse) is applied to us as final divorce under the term of Ba’in Baynoonah Sughra. That means you cannot reconcile back with the spouse except with a new marriage contract and new Mahr.

 

My suggestion since you want to go back to each other is to end the divorce process period since it is not final.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.