Wa `alaykum as-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

 

There are valid reasons for recourse to divorce in Islam:

 

1. Physical, mental, or emotional abuse or torture. When one of the spouses becomes abusive and inflicts physical, mental, or emotional torture, and is not willing to change by taking practical measures through therapy or counseling, then it is a valid reason for seeking divorce, for the Islamic principle states, “There shall be no inflicting or receiving of harm.”Zhulm(injustice) is not tolerated in Islam, regardless of who the perpetrator is.
2. Failure to fulfill the objectives and purposes for which marriage was initiated. This can be utter incompatibility between the partners, which may be expressed by their irreconcilable differences in temperaments, likes, and dislikes.
3. Marital infidelity. This can be a major cause for dissolution of marriage, for marriage is built on trust and confidence. Its main purpose is to preserve the chastity and modesty of those involved. Once this foundation is eroded and undermined and there is no chance to restore the same, then divorce is the way to go.
4. Failure of the husband to provide. When the man, who is considered the provider and maintainer of the family, fails to shoulder his responsibilities and the wife decides that she cannot continue tolerating his shirking of responsibility, this is grounds for divorce.

In your case, If you have children, my sincere advice is that you do your best to maintain this relation for the sake of those children. You should, then, try to accept him with his faults and pay him with the best in terms of manners and good treatment. Your reward of patience will be of no limits. But if you are sure this relationship has already caused you to hate him, you will not be able to continue and that it will deeply affect your faith, you may then opt for divorce.

This is explained in the Qur’an, “Divorce is twice. Then, either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment. And it is not lawful for you to take anything of what you have given them unless both fear that they will not be able to keep [within] the limits of Allah. But if you fear that they will not keep [within] the limits of Allah, then there is no blame upon either of them concerning that by which she ransoms herself. These are the limits of Allah, so do not transgress them. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allah – it is those who are the wrongdoers.” (Al-Baqarah 2:230)

 

Before taking this step, I suggest you consult people of wisdom who are around you and your husband.

Allah Almighty knows best.