You are mistaken in faulting Islam for your alleged behavior of your husband. If he is guilty of such actions, then he is certainly to be blamed. And you are wholly mistaken in blaming Islam for it. Islam is all about fairness and compassion.

Islam has raised the status of woman way before all other great religions. Islam taught from the very beginning that men and women are created from a single soul at a time when they were debating whether women have souls or not. It was in such a milieu that Islam arose raising the status of women as equal partners of men; Allah states:

“I shall not lose sight of the labour of any of you who labours [in My way], be it man or woman: each of you is an issue of the other.” (Aal `Imran 3:195). And it spells out the equality in the following verse:

“ VERILY, for all men and women who have sur­rendered themselves unto God, and all believing men and believing women, and all truly devout men and truly devout women, and all men and women who are true to their word, and all men and women who are patient in adversity, and all men and women who humble themselves [before God], and all men and women who give in charity, and all self-denying men and self-denying women,  and all men and women who are mindful of their chastity,  and all men and women who remember God unceasingly: for [all of] them has God readied forgiveness of sins and a mighty reward. (Al-Ahzab 33:35).

 

I would challenge anyone to pull out a verse similar from any of the world’s scriptures. The verse articulates in no uncertain terms the equality of men and women.

At the same time, Islam also takes into account the different roles of men and women. Women’s role as mothers raises them even to a higher status in Islam: that is why the Prophet said, “Paradise lies at the feet of mothers.”

As for treatment of wives, Allah orders men to treat them most honorably with the utmost kindness. That is why the Prophet declared: “The best of you is the one who is the kindest to his wife or spouse.” In other words, a man’s character in the sight of Allah is judged not by his ritual life rather by his character, which in turn is determined by how he treats his wife.

As his wife, you have every right to have free time with your husband. If he is a conscientious Muslim he should look at the Prophet as his exemplar: we learn from the Prophet’s wives that he would spend time with them regularly no matter how busy he was with his duties as a ruler, teacher, preacher, and spiritual leader. He cannot claim to be busier than the Prophet (peace be upon him).

In light of these, your husband’s behavior cannot be justified in Islam, and it behooves him to change.