As-salaam alaikum sister,

I am so sorry to hear about what has transpired in your life and the way you are feeling. I can imagine that you feel lost right now. I am so sorry about your precious sister, may Allah grant her Jannah and you and your family ease.

A Series of Major Traumatic Events

As your sister passed away recently, you must still be grieving in the early stages. This is the hardest part, please try to surround yourself with nurturing people and go to Allah with your tears, Allah is most merciful towards us.

To make matters worse, you indicated that your husband has applied for a divorce. He’s been having an affair with someone a lot younger. I’m not clear on how long you been married to your husband or how old he is. I don’t know how old this woman is that he is with, because you’re only 25, what is she 15? Your pain and hurt regarding this is understandable dear sister, what is not is your husbands cruelty and infantile perceptions.

You are a Blessing and a Pearl

Sister you have very much to live for. You have a lot of value and I am sure you are quite beautiful and pious. Men can be so misguided, cruel and selfish. Often times they do not know when they have a good woman. It is only till they lose her that they understand. I have a feeling your husband is going to be in for a very harsh and rude awakening in the near future.

Healing Steps

Sister I kindly suggest that you start a journal and write down your feelings daily. I would also ask you to write down the positive points about yourself, something nice about your looks, your accomplishments, the nice things you do for people and so forth. Often times it’s hard to see the good in ourselves when we have been beaten down so much. You have experienced so much loss especially your sister’s death, your husband’s leaving, and now the diagnosis of a genetic disease which may be life-threatening for your child should you get pregnant.

In times of hardship, we often forget to focus on what is good. The negative that is going on can overtake us, and that’s what seems to be happening right now. I am concerned however because you are going through at least four huge major life stressors. Inshallah I pray to Allah that you can move past these negative points and see the beauty that is you that He created, and the positive things that you will have in the future.  I understand that at this moment you may not even be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Please remember it is not the hope of the light that is an illusion, but the tunnel itself.

Seeking Counseling

Sister please do seek counseling in your area. Insha’Allah try to be around sisters who are uplifting and supportive of you during this difficult time. Make duaa to Allah to grant you ease and bless your steps towards healing.  If you feel like harming yourself please call the Suicide Prevention hotline in your area. You are precious, never doubt that for a moment. Please let us know how you are doing, you are in our prayers.