as salamu alaykum,

 

Thank you for writing to our live session.  As I understand, you are involved with a girl who is Sikh.  As you know dear brother, first of all being in a relationship is haram as well as her being Sikh means she is not permissible for you as she is not among those from the books which you can marry.  I kindly suggest that first of all you ask for Allah’s forgiveness (if you have committed haram) and ask Allah to guide both of your hearts.  In addition, you need to cease the relationship.  I realize this will be hard as you both have a bond now, but if you love Allah and seek to please Him-there are often sacrifices.  If you love this girl then you will end the relationship to protect her (and you) from haram as well as illustrate how a Muslim man should treat a woman.  These sacrifices, however, are for our own good in the long run.

 

You asked how to tell her parents that she is studying Islam, or that she should study Islam?  I think what you meant is that she is studying?  If not,  please forgive me.  If this is the case brother and she truly feels Islam is the way for her and she seeks knowledge for the sake of Allah (not for you) then I would kindly suggest brother that you let her learn Islam from the sisters at her local Masjid-as well as tell her parents on her own.  She does not need permission from her parents to study Islam, Allah guides who He will.  As far as her parents,  there really is no need for you to inform them.  This is between the girl, Allah and her parents.  She will tell them (if she does indeed become Muslim) on her own and may Allah bless her on this journey insha’Allah.

 

Should she take shahada brother, you may pursue her hand in marriage by approaching her parents.  As they are Sikh they may say no for religious reasons, regardless if she is Muslim (or not).  However, as you are both adults, living away from home and making your own lives in this world-you both have a right to chose whom you will marry.  In your case, the girl must be Islamically correct for you as you know.  I kindly suggest brother that you explain to her why you must end the relationship at this point, explain it is because you love and fear Allah as well as you respect her and do not want to lead her into haram but rather you would like if she continues studying Islam if she so chooses.  You may also want to refer her to some Islamic resources and Masjids in her new area as well.  It will be hard no doubt brother, but insha’Allah everything will work out to both your benefits insha’Allah.   If she is indeed studying Islam, she will understand why you must end a haram relationship and she will insha’Allah appreciate and respect you for standing up for what is right for both of you.  Maybe not right away, but as the light of Islam fills her heart with knowledge, she will truly understand and respect you for your strength to let her go for now.   Make duaa to Allah for her brother, keep her in your prayers that Allah guides her.  Insha’Allah she may one day be your wife insha’Allah, Allah knows best.