as salamu alaykum,

Shokran for writing to our live session.  It is great that your son is having quality time with his  dad watching you tubes and I’m sure the you tube content is fun and educational.  However as with all things fun and entertaining often time children can demand more time doing an enjoyable thing.  At 3 years old, your child is exploring the world around him.  He is also testing boundries and counts on you and your husband to set these boundries no matter what his behavioral or emotional reactions are (throwing a tantrum).  At this age your son is unable to regulate himself nor understand the concepts of logic or responsiblity.  As his parents when you set his time limit at 30 minutues, insha’Allah keep it at 30 minutes no matter what his response is.

Children quickly learn that  people like to avoid negative behavior or situations and as parents we may ‘give in” in order to avoid a scene, in order to keep peace in the home or to just keep our children calm and happy.  However I would kindly suggest  that you stick to your schedule despite his tantrums and maintain consistency with him concerning this.   In the long run you will be teaching your son that his negative behaviors will not be rewarded, that in life there are rules to follow as well as boundries.  As parents you will be setting up a home with a solid foundation of  values that your child can respect as he grows.  After all, what child feels secure in an environment with no structure or rules to follow?  Children do protest and get upset when we as parents adhere to our rules however in the long run they look to us to help them self-regulate as well as provide balance and consistency.  Insha’Allah sister, with patience and time your son will realize that his tantrums will not get him more screen time and he will outgrow these behaviors as they will provide no benefit to him.

As far as his eating, insha’Allah just ensure he is not excessively snacking between meals.  Children refusing to eat at meal time is common and is no cause for alarm unless there is a physical reason which I doubt.  At this age it is his way of excerting his independence! Often times a child will eat everday like clockwork.  Then sudenly not want to eat at all.  A favorite food today can be disliked food tomorrow.  Toddlers are very picky eaters and often are offended by texture, color, shape etc.  Try to have him help you prepare simple foods with you.  This may pique his interest.  Offer a variety of healthy choices at meal time and when serving his food to him, cut them into interestuing shapes or arrangements.  At the end of the day however, your child is going through a phase, much like the screen time in which he is trying to excert his independence and choices.  Food is really the only thing he actually has control over as he cannot be forced to eat.  Please do not worry however, he will not starve!  Your son will eat when he is hungry 🙂

 

You are a really good parent and doing a great job with your son.  Your concern is eveident in your questions and it is completely natural.  Your son sounds like a normal and active 3 year old who is trying to excert his independence.  Insha’Allah stick to your rules and boundries with him and he will pass through this phase just fine.  We wish you the best.