I do worship properly but with all the bad Wasawis coming in my head, what should I do?
I am a good person. I am not even sure whether Allah will accept my worshipping because I have these dirty thoughts.
Answer
In this counseling answer:
• You absolutely must reduce the amount of time you spent watching movies or listening to music and invest time in other activities which are productive.
• Being conscious of Allah’s presence will make us inhibit many of the things we would do otherwise.
• Input your time and effort in exercising, weight lifting, sports, and running.
• Limit the time you spent alone.
• I urge you to visit the mosque regularly because this will make you feel more connected to a community of Muslims.
As-Salamu ‘Alaikum dear brother,
Thank you for placing your trust in our ability to propose a solution to your current situation. I am sorry to hear of the troubles you have been going through. However, I want you to remember that you are in control of your mind, of what you feed into it and what it reflects.
Find the cause of the problem of “dirty” thoughts and eliminate them
Before you can eliminate your negative thoughts about the Prophet SAW and your “dirty” thoughts, you need to self-evaluate. In psychology, there are certain triggers. Such triggers which release certain chemicals in your brain and result in certain thoughts and performance of certain activities.
Therefore, you need to consider what triggers you. What causes you to think as such? Do you constantly watch movies which show inappropriate scenes, or listen to music with inappropriate lyrics? Do you not adhere to the Sunnah of lowering your gaze?
Lowering your gaze limits inappropriate feelings in you. It prevents desires which cannot be fulfilled. Lowering your gaze is of utmost importance given the hypersexuality we are exposed to on an everyday basis.
It is a well-known fact that an empty mind houses the devil. Hence, you absolutely must reduce the amount of time you spend watching movies or listening to music. Invest time in other activities which are productive.
Also, a high amount of testosterone in your blood causes high sexual urges, leading to feeling unsatisfied if not acted upon mentally or physically in certain cases. However, to offset the effects of high testosterone levels, get active.
Input your time and effort in exercising, weight lifting, sports, and running. Not only will these activities reduce your urges but will also benefit your physical health in the short and long term. Exercising causes us to feel happy and more relaxed. It releases various chemicals in the brain which leave you feeling stress-free and better about yourself.
Exercising regularly also boosts your confidence levels, improves self-esteem, and clears your mind of unwanted, depressing thoughts and builds motivation and positive mental attitude. Therefore, exercising helps to overcome many health issues. According to research, an individual should spend 150 minutes/week exercising, or at least 25 minutes/day.
In addition, there is, in fact, scientific evidence which suggests that working memory is altered with exposure to inappropriate material and negative thinking, resulting in inattention to important environmental, academic or even useful information and therefore unfavorable decision making and bad results in the future consequences.
Therefore, brother, you need to get your mind preoccupied if you want to stop your thoughts.
Also, limit the time you spent alone. This is because when we are alone, we resort to doing activities or thinking about things which we will not do when surrounded by others. Or, if you browse the internet and watch movies alone, move your computer to a place where others can see what is on your screen. This will successfully inhibit the triggers from negatively impacting you if this is a cause.
Check out this counseling video:
Be conscious of Allah’s omnipresence
We often forget that Allah SWT is always present. Before we do anything that makes us conscious, and would even make us feel guilty afterward, remember that Allah SWT is always there. Being conscious of His presence will make us inhibit many of the things we would do otherwise.
Allah SWT says in the Quran,
“And whoever fears Allah – He will make for him a way out And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allah – then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Allah has already set for everything a [decreed] extent.” (65: 2-3)
Do not underestimate the power of Istighfar
Read Istaghfar daily. Allah SWT says in the Quran:
”Ask forgiveness of your Lord and then repent to Him. He will send [rain from] the sky upon you in showers and increase you in strength [added] to your strength.” [Quran 11:52]
”Ask forgiveness of your Lord. Indeed, He is ever a Perpetual Forgiver.” [Quran 71:10]
Therefore, dear brother, seek to forgive Allah from all that you are guilty of having thought or done. Allah is the one who forgives and provides a way out of every problem we as individuals place ourselves in.
Seek Education and Important Information
Dear brother, it is possible that you are thinking negatively about the Prophet SAW given your lack of knowledge about him.
The Prophet SAW said,
“The Messenger of Allah said: ‘One Faqih (knowledgeable man) is more formidable against the Shaitan than one thousand devoted worshippers.'” (Sunan Ibn Majah)
Of course, this is conditional that the scholar and the learned student act upon the teachings rather than being mindless about them.
Although you worship and pray, it is also equally, if not more, important to acquire information. For example, if you spend 30 minutes a day reading Quran without translation and understanding, it is better if you read the Arabic version for 15 minutes and then for the next 15 minutes read the meaning and the explanation of the verses.
I would also advise you to see an imam in your community and ask him to speak to you about the Prophet SAW. I understand that you can simply google and watch many lectures, but there is more interaction and a feeling of connection when you speak to a local imam about Islam.
Lastly, I urge you to visit the mosque regularly because this will make you feel more connected to a community of Muslims. Visiting the mosque on a regular basis will also make you befriend a good company.
You should supplicate as much as possible. A supplication is asking Allah to keep us on the right path and to guide us towards what is right because Allah’s obedience is simply following the path lead by Prophet SAW.
I pray that you overcome your negative thoughts and feel happy and positive and think good thoughts at all times.
May Allah help you,
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