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Sex is Too Painful; I’m Afraid to Keep Trying

06 September, 2021
Q I got married last week on the day my period started. For the first two nights, I was slightly turned on and would look forward to his kisses. I even bought bodysuit lingerie for our first time doing it.

However, now a week later we are on honeymoon. We tried to do it three to four times and each time I started crying begging him to stop. We tried using lube gel and his spit as well.

I am just not turned on at all. I can’t put anything inside not even my own finger.

I need help. I suggested he gets a second wife and he got upset.

His sister said her first time was so painful as well that her husband had to cover her mouth to stop her sounds of scream. I just want it to be easy and not painful at all. Help me!

Answer

Salam Alaikum,

In this counseling video, you will learn:

• Go to your female doctor and talk about your issue. Check out whether you are physically OK.

• Maybe seek help from a sex therapist.

• Utilize helps that are available because they are available.

• Try relaxing techniques.

• If you have ever experienced any abuse in your life, it will make it hard for you to have a sexual relationship.

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• You are not alone. This is your test from Allah.

• Take your time. You do not need to force this.

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Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.

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About Megan Wyatt
Megan Wyatt is the founder of Wives of Jannah where she offers training programs, live workshops, and relationship coaching for wives and couples. She is a certified Strategic Intervention coach with specialized certifications for working with women and marital relationships and has been coaching and mentoring Muslims globally since 2008. She shares her passion for Islamic personal development in her Passionate Imperfectionist community. She is a wife and homeschooling mother with four children residing in Southern California.