A Married Woman Fell in Love with Me

09 November, 2019
Q Although she is married, she is falling in love with me. It's haram, but I feel I could love her for my all life. I don't want her to love me, but I want to love her always although I know I will not marry her. I just want to to keep in touch with her.

Answer


In this counseling answer:

• Cutting contact with her as soon as possible is the best way to prevent feelings between you getting any stronger.

• Remember Allah as much as possible and fear Him.

• Arrange some meetings. You may not feel motivated to do this at this point, feeling that you could never meet a woman you love as much as this one. However, in time, as you meet others, you will come to realize that there are other women out there who you could live happily with.


Assalamu alaikum wa Rahmatullah wa barakatuh brother,

If the sister you are talking about here is really married already, then please stay away from her for the sake of not falling into sin yourself as well as not being the path for her to fall into sin also.

Even staying in touch with her without any ill intentions at this point can easily lead you to commit sin. This is why it is recommended to stay away. Even if it is only via messaging, the result can still lead to the same. Cutting contact with her as soon as possible is the best way to prevent feelings between you getting any stronger.

Put yourself in the shoes of her husband. If he should find out, then it could potentially destroy their marriage. It will cause issues with trust. It is disrespectful of her to be doing these things behind his back.

A Married Woman Fell in Love with Me - About Islam

How would you feel if you were married and your wife did the same to you?


Check out this counseling video:


It may be difficult to walk away now that you have developed such strong feelings for her, but there are other ways to find love in the correct way that will not lead to sin. If you are looking for marriage, then ask around your friends and family if they know of any sisters looking for marriage. Arrange some meetings. You may not feel motivated to do this at this point, feeling that you could never meet a woman you love as much as this one. However, in time, as you meet others, you will come to realize that there are other women out there who you could live happily with.

To make this easier for you, remember Allah as much as possible and fear Him. Remembering that what you are doing with her is sinful will provide you with some motivation to cut ties and seek marriage to someone else via permissible means due to the fear of Allah that you carry in your heart. Spend more times in acts of worship, especially fasting that serves as an excellent means to control one’s desires.

May Allah guide you in the straight path and grant you a righteous spouse who will be the coolness of your eyes in this life and the next.

Amen,

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Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.

Read more:

I’m Married, but in Love with Another Man

A Man in Love with a Married Woman: Allowed?

I Wish I Had Married a Beautiful Woman

 

About Hannah Morris
Hannah Morris is a mum of 4 and she currently works as Counsellor and Instructor of BSc. Psychology at the Islamic Online University (IOU). She obtained her MA degree in Psychology and has over 10 years of experience working in health and social care settings in the UK, USA, and Ireland. Check out her personal Facebook page, ActiveMindCare, that promotes psychological well-being in the Ummah. (www.facebook.com/activemindcare)