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How to Avoid Distance from God?

30 November, 2016
Q Thank you for this Web site that has helped me in so many ways. There are two questions I would like to ask. In Islam, I know it is haram (forbidden) to be gay, but in person I don’t have a problem with gay people. Just out of interest, is it haram to be friends with a gay male? My second question is, I feel like living in the West is not making me closer to Islam. I noticed when I went abroad to an Islamic country, there were mosques every 5 minutes. This made me very happy, and to hear the call to prayer filled my heart with joy. I feel like in an Arabic country wherever I go I am reminded of Allah and I love Him. However in the West I am not so much. I go to the mosque and do my daily prayers, but I don’t know why I don’t have the same feeling like I was in the Arabic country. Does this mean my iman (faith) is low, and does it mean I should live in a Muslim country, as it makes me closer to God and be a better Muslim? Thank you for your time.


Salam Dear Zarah,

Thank you for your question and for putting faith in us to answer it for you.

You are correct in stating that practicing homosexual activities is haram (forbidden) in Islam. With respect to befriending homosexuals, I am reminded of a hadith of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him).

The essence of it, generally is, “A person is of the faith (deen) of his or her companion.” That is to say that a person is likely to be of the same mind, heart, and attitude as his or her friends.

When you say that you don’t mind if a person is a homosexual or befriending him, I can’t help wondering what it is about a gay person that might attract you.

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Perhaps you feel that since a gay male is not sexually attracted to you as a woman that you can associate with members of the opposite sex and feel “safe” knowing that no sexual relationship will develop. You may not know that many homosexual males are actually bisexual, meaning that they are interested in relationships with both sexes.

It is also important to realize that Allah has not created them homosexuals from birth. They are simply rebellious people that follow no other rules than the ones that satisfy their twisted desires.

I advise you as your brother in Islam that you avoid these people as much as you can. They have no sense of shame or decency, even though they may wear the masks of kind, compassionate people.

Do you feel safe in knowing that, as Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) mentioned in another hadith, the curse of Allah is on those who imitate members of the opposite sex?

Personally, I would feel afraid to associate with someone who doesn’t fear Allah, disobeys Him by practicing major sins on a regular basis, and is a main factor in the destruction of family values and of human civilization.

The family is the building block of every stable society, and homosexuals aim to strike at the very heart of what we as Muslims hold most dear. As Muslims we should love what Allah loves and hate what Allah hates. There is no other way to win Allah’s pleasure and mercy.

It is natural and not surprising, therefore, to hear that you feel further from Allah in the West than you do in the Muslim countries. Actually, this is a good sign.

Subconsciously, you may feel that there are very few people watching over you living in the West, so it is very easy to do what you please and no one will know. But please don’t forget that wherever you are, whether people see you or not, Allah sees and knows what is in the deepest corners of your heart and soul.

You may be able to hide things from your friends and neighbors, and even from yourself, but you can’t hide anything from Allah, the One Who created the hearts and souls.How to Avoid Distance from God

It is possible, however, to lead a righteous life as a Muslim in the West, but you need to be protective of your identity, beliefs, and traditions. Living in the West, you are perfectly free to live as you choose. This means you are free to live your life as a devout Muslim as well.

There are many excellent Muslims that you could associate with who will never lead or encourage you to do something that angers Allah Almighty. They will revive your faith, by Allah’s will, and keep it strong by reminding you of your identity and your duties to Allah.

If you are still unable to maintain a strong faith after this, then it is not a bad idea to move to a Muslim country. Western society is not for everyone. We have to choose what makes Allah happy with us, first and foremost. This is the true meaning of Islam and of being a Muslim.

I hope this has shed some light on your questions. I ask Allah to protect us from the evils around us and from the evils of our own souls. Thank you and please keep in touch.


About Waleed Najmeddine
Waleed Ahmed Najmeddine is a Canadian born Muslim and public school administrator. He is an active member of the Muslim community and enjoys educating Muslims and non-Muslims about Islam. He currently holds a Master of Education degree in leadership and school improvement.