As salamu alaykum sister,

 

Thank you for writing to our live session. I am very sad to hear what you have been going through with depression as well as with an abusive marriage which alhamdulillah you got out of.   Depression can be a devastating illness and is very prevalent. Sadly millions of people worldwide suffer from depression in one form or another. Depression is also more common in women and it is one of the most diagnosed mental health disorders. You Are Not Alone.

 

Sister, as you’re going through a very hard time right now and the depression is not decreasing, I am wondering what kind of treatment you are getting from the psychiatrist. I will kindly suggest that you speak with your psychiatrist or counselor and inform them that you are still depressed and you would like to try other treatments. There are many different kinds of medications as well as many different types of therapy that can help. I also noted that you talk about the trauma that you went through with your marriage and the sadness you feel as well in regards to your in-laws betraying you and the possibility of your x getting remarried.

 

Sister, as long as you hang onto the past you won’t be able to move forward. I know it was very painful and I’m so sorry you went through this horrid abuse.  What your x-husband and in-laws did to you is vile, haram and sinful.  I feel sorry for any girl that would marry him and you should too.  They are not living a “happy” life sister, people who are cruel and abusive are generally miserable people who just take their anger and pain out on others.  Allah sees ‘s all and Allah’s justice can be swift.

Sister, please do not let these thoughts consume you. You may wish to look into cognitive behavioral therapy which will help you do just that. You may want to suggest this to your therapist or psychiatrist if you are not already engaged in cognitive behavioral therapy. It will help you get rid of negative, maladaptive thoughts and help you to learn to utilize and create more realistic and positive thought process for your future. Cognitive behavioral therapy is very successful in treating depression. Additionally, if you’re not on an antidepressant you may wish to try a medication that you are compatible with. If you are on medication, you may need an adjustment in the dose or you may need a different medication. Either way, please know that there is hope and you will not always feel this way. You will insha’ Allah find relief very soon. Please do speak with your psychiatrist and or therapist request different treatment make sure that they know that you were still suffering at great lengths from depression,.  Additionally dear sister, please ask them to screen you for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).  Based on the abuse you went through you may also be suffering from PTSD.

 

Insha’Allah sister, focus on the positive things and blessings in your life and make a list of them every day and read them. Draw closer to Allah through prayer, reading Quran, attending the Masjid, joining sisters for social events and other things that are uplifting and spiritually nourishing. You may want to check out support groups in your area for depression. You can ask your doctor for referrals or you can look online.  They are very helpful.  Support groups can be very empowering.  They offer us new coping skills, we can hear stories from others who have suffered as we did/are and learn from them. It is also a safe place where you can talk about how you feel and be understood. Please do consider the above tips my dear sister and know that your pain will not last, that there is help available you just have to take a few more steps and be assertive in requesting different treatment modes.

 

As I stated you’re not alone.  There are many people especially women, who are or were going through what you are.  Many have gone through their journeys of healing which led to successful and happy lives. Allah loves you and He wants you to be happy as well. Reach out to Allah, trust in the process and insha’Allah you will be on the road to recovery. You are in our prayers, please do let us know how you are.