Wa alaikum salaam wa rahmatulahi wa barakatuh brother,

 

Marriage can be a source of great happiness, but also comes with many challenges also. In your case, it seems that your wife is suffering from mental health problems. What makes it especially difficult for you, is that it seems this information was concealed from you since before you got married. She is experiencing a number of distressing symptoms that can be difficult for loved ones to manage, especially when it comes to things such as attempting suicide.

 

It is ok to seek a divorce in Islam and there is nothing wrong with it, especially if you feel you have been deceived, however, we also know that marriage is an institution that is well protected in Islam too. This is why seeking a marriage can be quite a difficult and lengthy process and people desiring divorce must ideally take a number of steps to reconcile the marriage before taking the final option of divorce.

 

Before rushing into a divorce, you might consider first trying to give her support with her illness. You can begin by learning more about what she is going through from her directly and by reading up online about it also. You might also pick up some tips on how best to help her out.

 

You could also support her in attendance at medical appointments and encourage her to attend counselling. Often this disorder can arise as a result of previous trauma and therefore the best way to overcome it is to receive counselling for this past issues. In time, once this trauma is addressed patients can return to a state where they do not exhibit such intense behavior. Having your support during this time could be of great assistance in overcoming this difficult time.

 

Caring for someone and/or being in a relationship with someone who is experiencing such difficulties can be extremely difficult. There is no shame in taking a break from the situation as often dealing with such a difficult situation on a daily basis can lead those around the affected person to face burn out. Therefore, it is essential to take a break also. Make sure that she has someone reliable to stay with or to stay with her, such as a friend or family member and take some time away for yourself. This will also give you space to really think about your situation and your options; seek a divorce or stay? Being away from the situation to think about it will give you a more rational space to consider your options without being influenced by your immediate surroundings, i e. Your spouse and her behavior.

 

Try to give things a chance first, trying to understand things from her side and support her through her difficulties and maybe the love between you will strengthen as you realize the daily struggles she faces. If you still feel too betrayed by her and her family after this time and that you will be unable to cope with the situation then it is ok to seek divorce via the correct channels. The most important thing is to know that you have given it a chance. If you don’t take these steps to save the marriage, then you may be left feeling guilty for not having tried more to help, or make the relationship work. At least, if you have tried then you can be more confident that you are making the best choice.

 

May Allah make things easy for you and grant your wife full recovery from her illness. May He grant you success and happiness in this life and the next.