How to soften my heart? There are so many things that are affecting it; there are so many people attacking; and there are so many desires and whims, so many thoughts and whispers of Satan…
So how do I soften my heart?
There are so many things to soften our hearts. Among the famous things are things that we do to others. So whenever you do good to others, Allah softens your heart, providing that you’re sincere and you’re doing it for the sake of Allah.
If you take care of the widows, if you take care of the homeless and the refugees, if you take care of an orphan, Allah would soften your heart.
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said to one of his companions:
Do you want to attain what you desire and to get your heart softened?
The companion said:
The Prophet (peace be upon him) told him:
Go to an orphan and wipe over his head.(Musnad Aḥmad, 7522)
This is a gesture and a sign of kindness and being merciful. When you see a five year old or a six year old orphan and you pat on their head and you hug them, they feel the love and compassion which they miss from their departed father.
Doing good to others softens your heart, feeding the poor, the hungry, providing for them softens your heart.
Going for Hajj and Umrah
Among the most favorite things to do is the things you do between you and Allah.
Now, there are things that are between you and Allah, these will definitely soften your heart such as doing Hajj and Umrah often. This cleanses you from sins and increases your provision; also, this is a source of income as the Prophet Muhammad said.
So, if you want income, you make Hajj or Umrah. Don’t worry about expenses Allah would provide for you, Allah would give you because it would increase your provision.
Seeking Allah’s Forgiveness
Allah mentioned in the Quran that if you were to seek Allah’s forgiveness, Allah would have mercy over you.
So seeking forgiveness softens your heart, because when Allah has mercy over you, your heart is softened. So the more you ask Allah for forgiveness during the day and night, the softer your heart will become.
And every one of us must ask himself this question: “How many times do I seek Allah’s forgiveness per day and night? Today how many times did I say Astaghfirullah?”
You will find that maybe I said this three or four times when I made a mistake.
The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) says:
My heart is covered and I would seek Allah’s forgiveness a hundred times or more than a hundred times.(Muslim)
The heart is covered by negligence and forgetfulness; and in our cases, you and I, it’s covered by sins. So, we have to keep on asking Allah forgiveness so the heart will become soft again.