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On Being a New Muslim (Q&A Session)

Theresa Corbin
27 December, 2016

Asalamu Alaikum brothers and sisters, 

More and more people are entering Islam and facing a mountain of unanswered questions. For this reason, we are pleased to offer a live session for new Muslims.

This session will be dedicated to answering all the questions new Muslims have about identity, culture, and learning and living Islam.

You don’t even have to be “new” to participate. Those who are newly practicing are welcome to join the session.

The session host will be writer and once new Muslim, Theresa Corbin. So please jot down your questions and join us Friday, December 30th from 9 PM-11 PM GMT –> 12 AM – 2 AM (Saturday morning) Makkah.

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Saturday, Dec. 31, 2016 | 00:00 - 02:00 GMT

Session is over.
DISCLAIMER
Views expressed by hosts/guests on this program (live dialogue, Facebook sessions, etc.) are their own and their appearance on the program does not imply an endorsement of them or any entity they represent.  

I am a new Muslimah living in the US, but I am terrified to wear hijab because of the anti-Muslim climate here. What can or should I do?



Asalamu Alaikum sister,

Welcome to Islam! I understand your concern, as I lived in the US for 15 years as a Muslim women wearing hijab. It is not an easy thing. Simply putting a piece of cloth over your hair makes you an instant target of harassment and sometimes worse. And this is a very serious and scary thing. People who do not experience this can too easily dismiss this serious stress Muslim women in the US face.

I converted to Islam one month after 9/11. And like you, I was terrified of wearing hijab. In fact, the thought of having to wear the hijab kept me from converting for some time. That was until a Muslim lady gave me some good advice. She said Islam is not about hijab. While hijab (for both men and women) and modesty in all aspects of life is an important part of the manners of a Muslim, it is not a core belief in Islam. Take it easy. Learn the faith and see what happens.

And I did. I converted almost immediately after that advice. But I didn’t wear hijab right out of the gate. That came a bit later, after I got some strength of iman (faith) from living and learning Islam. Since you are new to Islam, I suggest that you focus on learning and implementing the pillars of iman (faith) and Islam. This will increase your faith, and with increased faith, only Allah Almighty knows what is possible.

Here are some links about these pillars:

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https://www.whyislam.org/on-faith/the-five-pillars-of-islam/ http://www.missionislam.com/knowledge/sixpillarsiman.htm

Perhaps, since it is winter, if you want to take steps toward wearing hijab, you can start by wearing warm hats and the like. But if this is too much for you, know that your priority is your connection with Allah. Strengthen that step by step. Islam is meant to be easy. So, don’t overburden yourself. 

Learn the 6 pillars of iman. Learn about Allah Almighty through His attributes. Learn about Islam and start implementing the five pillars of prayer and so on. And forget about what people say one way or another. Ask Allah to give you the strength and courage of conviction to draw nearer to Him by doing all that pleases Him.

If you find that you are still not able to wear hijab because of the atmosphere of fear in the US right now, don’t ever let it hold you back from learning about your faith and living it step by step. Do your best at your own pace. This is all that Allah requires of us, is to try.

And don’t let the shaytan trick you into thinking that if you can’t do one thing, like wear hijab, then you can’t do anything to draw nearer to Allah. This is totally untrue. You can still be an amazing Muslim. And always, no matter what, ask Allah for His protection and mercy. I hope this helps. May Allah keep you safe and firm on the path to Him. Also, check out these useful links:

https://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/understanding-islam/signs-allahs-mercy/

https://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/understanding-islam/on-allahs-greatness-allah-u-akbar/

https://aboutislam.net/shariah/hadith/this-hadith/yasir-qadhi-looking-allahs-face-video/

I am not so new to Islam, but I am still very confused about the terminology used for new Muslims. When I came to Islam, we were called converts, but now Muslims call those not born into a Muslim family- reverts. Why is this? What is the significance of these terms?



Walaikum Asalam,

Thank you for your thoughtful question. It can be a bit of a sticky question depending on whom you talk to. People prefer one term or another and sometimes get offended if you use the wrong term. And the source of this difference in terminology depends on what each person believes fitra, or our innate human nature, means.  

Those who call themselves “reverts” do so because it was revealed to the Prophet (PBUH) that each of us is born believing in Allah Almighty, as a natural belief, and that we instinctively know right from wrong. Therefore, Islam is the natural religion of each human being. And if we are left to our own devices, and not made to follow other religions by our families, each of us would stay on that natural religion. So, accepting Islam after having been raised in another religion is just a coming back to that nature–a reversion back to our fitra. This is from where the term “revert” comes. 

While those who prefer the term “convert” agree that the fitra is truly our nature, they also believe that to be a Muslim requires knowledge and choice; and we are not born with knowledge and as children, we don’t have a lot of choice in the religion we are raised. To find out more about why some people choose to stick with the term “convert”, check out the link here: https://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/living-islam/convert-revert-matter/ where I have explained my personal choice to refer to myself as a convert.

I hope this helps your understanding of the issue of terminology. All the best!

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Assalammu Alaykum, My name is Joseph, and when I first converted to Islam, people started calling me Yusuf. I was just wondering if I have to go by the Arabic version of my name now that I am Muslim.



Walaikum Asalam Joseph/Yusuf,

Welcome to Islam! I actually know someone else to whom the exact same thing happened, same name and everything. For those who come from an Arab background, calling you by the Arabic version of your name might have just been easier for them and nothing more. Actually, it is interesting to note that the name “Yusuf”, while it has become an Arabic name, is not originally from Arabic, since Prophet Yusuf (PBUH) himself was not an Arab.

However, there are some Muslims who believe that you must change your name to an Arabic name once you convert/revert. This is simply not true. There is no evidence for this in the Quran or sunnah. 

The general principle is that you can keep your name as long as it doesn’t mean something bad. For example, someone with a name that means “ugly” or “evil” would be advised to change his or her name out of respect for the beautiful and good nature with which Allah (SWT) created all human beings.  

But having an Arabic name is not required of you as a Muslim, since you are not becoming an Arab. The Arabic language has significance in Islam because it is the language in which the Quran was revealed and has been preserved, but the Arabs or Arabic names generally, in themselves, hold no superiority to other ethnicities or names from other languages.

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We are only superior by way of piety and this is equal opportunity and only for Allah alone to determine. So, if you don’t like being called “Yusuf”, and since your name means something very good (Allah Almighty increases in piety, power, and influence–the same meaning as Yusuf), you have every right to very kindly ask people to call you by the name your parents gave you.

I hope this helps. May Allah bless you in your name, which ever iteration of it you decide to go by, and make it a source of good for you in this life and the next. And please check out these links to learn more:

https://aboutislam.net/counseling/ask-about-islam/story-prophet-yusuf-wife-al-aziz/

https://aboutislam.net/counseling/ask-about-islam/need-change-names/

Salam sister, Thank you for offering this help to us new Muslims. Since I came to Islam about 3 months ago, it seems that all the advice I get is about strict rules. For example, people tell me I have to get rid of my dog and I have to stop wearing nail polish and I have to do this and stop doing that. While I want to be a good Muslim, I also want to take things one step at a time. What should I do in the light of all this well meaning, but hard advice?



Walaikum Asalam,

Welcome to Islam! I commend you on your efforts to be a good Muslim. And you are correct in feeling like you should take things one step at a time. Islam was revealed to the Prophet (Peace and blessing be upon him (PBUH)- the best of humankind) and his followers (the best generation of humankind) over a period of 23 years.

This means, among other things, that Islam is not something that can be implemented overnight. It is a process of coming nearer and nearer to Allah step by step.

The first revelations to the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) were not about dogs or nail polish. They were not even rules. The first revelations were about Allah; His love for His creation, His Supreme Mercy and Forgiveness. It is so important to know Allah. This is your foundation in Islam, the reason you will want to do all that Islam entails will come from your love of Allah. But how can you love Him and wish to seek His pleasure if you don’t know Him yet, if you don’t know something of what He has revealed to us about Himself through Islam? 

Take some time to learn about the attributes of Allah, His Mercy, His Compassion, His Knowledge, etc, and all that they mean. Here are some links to get started:

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https://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/understanding-islam/signs-allahs-mercy/

https://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/understanding-islam/on-allahs-greatness-allah-u-akbar/

https://aboutislam.net/shariah/hadith/this-hadith/yasir-qadhi-looking-allahs-face-video/

What I recommend when dealing with fellow Muslims who try to load you up with what is prohibited is to kindly ask them if they would instead teach you about the pillars of Islam (including prayer, fasting, etc.) and iman (in English this means something like faith, and knowing Allah (SWT) is the first pillar of iman).

There are 6 pillars of iman and 5 pillars of Islam, as you probably know by now, that must be nailed down first and foremost. It takes time to get a full understanding of these things and to incorporate them into your life. So, go step by step as you said you wished to.

If you rush yourself or someone else rushes you to learn and live by these pillars, you might feel overwhelmed and that is not the point of Islam. Islam is meant to be easy. So take it easy. 

Here are some links about these pillars:

https://www.whyislam.org/on-faith/the-five-pillars-of-islam/

http://www.missionislam.com/knowledge/sixpillarsiman.htm

So, I suggest you refocus other’s advice to you. Let them know you are taking it slowly, as is your right, and the pillars are things you wish to learn about first. I am sure that those who offer to guide you have the best intentions at heart and will gladly redirect their advice. 

Also, ask Allah to guide you to His truth. Many people hold opinions that are just that, opinions, and can be heavy on the new Muslim. We ask Allah in our prayers to guide us to the straight path 17 times a day, but it cannot hurt to ask Him at other times for this as well.

I hope this helps. May Allah guide us all to His Truth. All the best in your new, amazing journey.

Hi, thank you for doing this. I very recently took my shahada, but now I am super anxious to tell my family that I am Muslim. I have no idea how they will react. What is the best way, do you think, to break the news?



Walaikum Asalam,  

Welcome to Islam! And thank you for asking such an important question.

I understand that this is a very sensitive topic to broach with family. They may feel betrayed by your choice to seek a different religion from the one that perhaps they spent so much time educating you and raising you in. But you can be patient and gentle with them and explain to them why you have become a Muslim.

Now, before you break the news, you need to take into consideration what your family’s current views of Islam are. If they have very negative views of Islam and Muslims, it might take a bit more time and finesse. First, you can start to tell them by showing. That is, you should start treating them as a Muslim should treat his or her family. This means being respectful and helpful no matter how they treat you.

Show them Islam first. Then you can start talking about the things you have learned about Islam as a way of more directly showing Islam to them in a positive light. Then, after some time of doing both of these things, you can tell them you have become Muslim yourself. These steps might help soften the blow they might feel from this news.

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You can ask them kindly if they would give you the respect of hearing you out so that you can explain why you have chosen Islam. If they are too upset, then give them space. Be kind to them. Change is hard. And your converting might be a big change for them.

If you get upset and storm out, then you are closing doors you do not want to close, and Allah (SWT) directs you to never close. Allah (SWT) instructs us to never ever cut off ties with our family. So, try to see things from their side and bring them little by little to a better understanding of Islam and why you chose it for your life.

If you broach the topic of Islam and find their views aren’t so negative, then still have wisdom and show them kindness, always. But maybe you won’t need to take it as slowly. 

Here is a letter I have written to the families of new Muslims that might help you broach the topic with them. Maybe you can even email it to them when you are ready. There is no real rush. And here is an article my sister wrote about how she felt about my conversion, how we are still sisters and best friends, and that there was nothing to fear. I hope this helps. May Allah (SWT) make your path easy.