Dear Brother/Sisters

Thank you for participating in the session. Here are the 4 questions our counselor provided an answer for.

If you want to submit your question, please visit one of our upcoming live sessions.

Question 1. After My Illness, I Am Obsessed with Death

Asalamualaikum, I’m a young sister dealing with fear of death and obsession towards it I fear death a lot I don’t know why. I’m certain and aware that death is inevitable and it will come it’s time but my obsession and fear has grown to a point I can’t do daily activities like eat or sleep I’m constantly fearing crying and panicking thinking am going to die.

My obsession around it started 2 months ago after I was sick. I went to several hospitals and emergency rooms but all said your fine and have no illness. Now I feel so sick and when I feel that the phobia kicks in and I start to panic and think about death what can I do to prevent these obsessions destroying my life. Jazakallah

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Question 2. Need Advice on Career Choice with Illness

Aoa I am a mbbs doctor and due to my diabetes now I am among those who are vulnerable to infections. Should I think that Allah will not make me sick again and expose myself to this risk?
Or should I try to find other means of employment meanwhile I don’t have a financially stable family by thinking that Allah will give rizk?
Initially I continued my job which is no doubt stressful and affects my blood sugar and despite controlling it to a good level I got tuberculosis. Alhamdullilah, it got healed. So now I am confused that which way is right I have been blessed with the opportunity to apply for postgraduate training. I don’t feel confident in my skills that’s why I didn’t open a clinic and thought a post graduate degree will be a good option. Getting a job is difficult because I try without any references because I think it’s not a good deed but in my country the reference system is strong but my heart doesn’t want it. I can’t change my city as well because I don’t have confidence to live alone with my insulin dependent diabetes which always have unpredictable events e.g. passing out during a night due to hypoglycemia I don’t want to rely on stranger during these events
So the only thing which is making me guilty is that am I wrong to be afraid of the risks despite the opportunity to avail it even the researches prove it to be a risk for diabetics and I have faced it 2 times since diagnosis its almost only 4 years and my life has changed a lot. I know it’s a test but I don’t want to be unthankful but situation seems risky to my health I know type 1 diabetes who served as doctor although they managed somehow but it still takes a toll on health more than a healthy individual
I hope I made my concerns clear

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Question 3. Depersonalization & Faith: I Struggle with What Is Real

As salamu alaykum. I have been struggling with depersonalization for several years and I didn’t know about it until recently. I believe my DP is also affecting my faith in that I struggle with what’s real. I also feel that DP is a result of my sins. I have been feeling that my spiritual eye has been getting weaker to the point that I’m somewhat spiritually blind. I pray 5 times a day and I try to be regular in my recitation of the Quran. We have mental illness in my family tree (dementia, depression, psychosis, and even epilepsy). I would like to add that when I pray especially, I feel as if I am suffocating or that something is stuck in my throat and its terribly uncomfortable. I don’t want to blame my struggles on Sihr or Jinn anymore. But it is something paranormal?
Jzk Allahu khairan.

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Question 4. Struggling with Being Grateful; Please Help!

As someone who wants to memorize the Quran and also is trying to quit an addiction, I have a hard time being grateful because there are people who never got addicted to anything and didn’t struggle in their hifz because of their addiction. Sometimes I wish for Allah to just take me from this world but I always wake up the next morning, this then makes me upset.
I know Allah hears all things but I just feel like Allah does not understand. I remind myself Allah is wise and there is a reason why everything happens but it cause me emotional pain. I struggle with accepting Allah’s decree as well.

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