Dear Brothers/Sisters,

Thank you very much for joining us in this Fatwa session. We would also like to thank our guest, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, for answering the questions directed to him. You will find the answers to your questions below.

Question

What are the signs laylat al-qadr?

Answer

Laylat al-Qadr is the most blessed night in Islam; it surpasses in merit a thousand months.

The Prophet ordered us to seek it in the last ten nights of Ramadan, and according to some reports, especially on the odd nights.

Imam Al-Bukhari reports on the authority of Ubadah Ibn as-Samit, that the Prophet (peace be upon him) came out to inform us about the exact night of Qadr; then he saw two Muslims quarreling. So, consequently, its knowledge was lifted. (And he said three is good for keeping it as a hidden mystery. So, it would be best if you searched for it on the (twenty) fifth, (twenty) seventh, and (twenty) night nights.

Now coming to the specific signs on the night of Qadr, here are a few of the signs that we can infer from the sources:

1.         It fills the hearts of the believers with a deep sense of tranquility and peace;

2.         And they will be receptive to enhanced spiritual graces and may even sense the presence of angels who descend in throngs;  

3.         And thanks to these, the supplications elicit a response from Allah;

4.         The sun will rise the following day with no rays.

In conclusion, we should seize the blessings of Laylat al-Qadr during the last ten nights.

Question

Can I pay zakat al-fitr one week before eid?

Answer

Zakat a-l Fitr is due when the sun sets on the last day of Ramadan. Therefore, one should disburse it to the poor before the Eid Prayer.

Now, the scholars are divided on whether one can pay it in advance:

One group says it can be advanced one or two days before. However, Imam Abu Hanifah says we are allowed to give it even before Ramadan; Imam Ash-Shafi`i thinks we may start giving it from the beginning of Ramadan.

The difference of opinion is because there is no explicit text to make a firm ruling.

However, it is not hard to arrive at a satisfactory conclusion when we look at the issue from the point of view of the purpose and objective Zakatu al-Fitr:

Abdullah ibn Abbas said, “The Prophet prescribed Zakat a-l Fitr to serve as a means of expiation for the fasting person from the deficiencies due to and to provide for the poor (on the day of Eid). So whoever gives it before the Prayer is considered a valid Zakah. But whoever pays after it is reckoned only as one of the charities.

So, considering the purpose of Zakat al-Fitr, the view of Imam Abu Hanifah and Ash-Shafi`i can be reasonable. Moreover, this is the view we can adopt in the present-day circumstances where we face an unprecedented situation of millions of Muslim refugees in various parts of the world; so Muslims have a responsibility to come to their help and provide for them to celebrate Eid.

In conclusion, there is no need to be rigid on this issue if we take into account the purpose and objective of Zakat al-Fitr.

Question

What is the reward of eid prayer?

Answer

Allah says in the Quran:

 “Ramadan is the month in which the Quran was revealed. Guidance for humanity, and clear portents of guidance, and the Criterion. Whoever of you witnesses the month shall fast it. But whoever is sick or on a journey, then a number of other days. God desires ease for you, and does not desire hardship for you, that you may complete the number, and celebrate God for having guided you, so that you may be thankful.” (Al-Baqarah 2:185)

The last part of the above verse refers to Eid al- Fitr. Therefore, Eid al- Fitr is an occasion to glorify Allah and give thanks to Him after the completion of the fasting of Ramadan.

Eid prayer is a highly recommended communal act of worship, meriting tremendous blessings. There are only two great festivals in Islam. The first one is Eid al- Fitr, which marks the end of the blessed month of Ramadan, and the second is the feast of sacrifice commemorating the Great Sacrifice of Prophet Ibrahim and the culmination of the hajj.

Both prayers are full of blessings.

Eid al- Fitr is an occasion to thank Allah for the honor of the successful completion of fasting. It also serves as an occasion for expressing joy and communal spirit, an opportunity for the community to gather, exchange greetings, and brotherly feelings, visit, and share happiness with family, friends, and neighbors.

The Prophet encouraged everyone, including women of all ages, to attend the occasion of Prayer so they could also be part of this most auspicious communal festivities. It celebrates the purity and victory over Satanic temptations.  

Question

I woke up this morning and I realised I was no longer on my period can I fast? Although I have not yet taken by ghusl bath neither did I wake up for sahur or wake up for prayer

Answer

You are allowed to start fasting once your menses has expired. The fact that you still need to perform the Ghusl should not be a deterrent. We learn from Aishah that the Prophet sometimes would wake up in a state of ritual impurity, and he would bathe before performing the Fajr prayer and would continue the fast.

Question

I was invited to a Muslim relatives house, my mother informed me that they know that we eat halal handcut meat. Before going I was a bit nervous because I didn’t want to offend them by not eating the food. When I got there and I ate the meat I had no doubts about it being halal.

Now after I have left I feel a bit scared because I don’t know if they served us hand cut halal meat or machine cut halal meat and I didn’t even think about this in the moment (but I did think about it before)

What do I do, as a Muslim am i supposed to assume the food is halal especially with them knowing that we eat halal?

I read that duas are not accepted for 40 days if we eat food that isn’t and I have never so I’m very worried

Answer

There is no basis in Islam to distinguish between hand-slaughtered meat and machine-slaughtered meat. It is not warranted by the principles of Shari`ah nor by the rules of Fiqh. Therefore, the only valid question to ask is whether the slaughter fulfills the prescribed slaughter standards.

  The rules of Islamic slaughter are pretty precise and straightforward. Let us list them here:

•           Invoking the name of Allah

•           Cutting the throat/arteries with a sharp knife/instrument

•           Thus administering a quick death

•           Sparing the animal for unnecessary torture and suffering

 In reply to a question about lawful slaughter, the Prophet (peace be upon him) stated: “As long as one invokes God’s name, and the animal is slaughtered with a sharp instrument letting the blood flow, you may eat it.” (Al-Bukhari and others)

 In other words, the instrument should be sharp enough to cut the arteries, letting the blood flow efficiently, thus sparing the animal from torture or inflicting unnecessary pain. In another hadith, he states: “Allah enjoins benevolence in all things we do, so, if a person were to slaughter an animal (for food), he should sharpen the knife and make the slaughter easy on the animal (to avoid unnecessary torture).” (Muslim)

 These are the rules of slaughter as clearly outlined in the primary sources of Islam: the Qur’an and the Sunnah; these are the same rules that the great imams and jurists have formulated in all the authentic schools of jurisprudence.

 There is virtually no disagreement among them, irrespective of the divergence of their madhhabs (Schools of Jurisprudence), regarding the lawfulness of consuming such meat.

 Therefore, one may safely conclude that all animals that have been slaughtered in this manner, as long as they are fit for Muslim consumption, are halal (lawful) for Muslims to eat, irrespective of whether they are hand-slaughtered, or machine slaughtered.

 Considering these well-established principles, all the eminent scholars and reputable juristic councils (including the Fatwa Council of al-Azhar and the World Council of Muslim Jurists) have ruled on the permissibility of machine slaughter as long it conforms to the standards mentioned above.

 Therefore, we should stop making such a false distinction between hand and machine slaughter, rendering the latter unlawful.

It would amount to arrogating to ourselves the authority to make things halal and haram, which is the exclusive prerogative of Allah and Allah alone.

 Furthermore, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) has warned us against rigidity in matters of religion.

Therefore, we should refrain from creating dissensions based on trivial issues; instead, we must focus on more critical matters vital for Islam and Muslims.

Question

Is my fasting valid, if i have kept the niyath for fasting for the next day and masturbated during the night of ramadan and did not do the Ghusl  (Bath) before the suhoor or fajr,but did the ghusl for fajr prayer.

Answer

Masturbation is a sin, so I urge you to repent and beg for the forgiveness of Allah.

You should break this habit by using the blessed occasion of Ramadan. Then, if you turn to Allah for help, He will help you overcome this bad habit.

Now, whether your fast is valid if you did not perform Ghusl before Fajr, the answer is: Yes. We learn from Aishah, the beloved wife of the Prophet, that sometimes he would wake up in a state of ritual impurity and yet continue the fast, performing Ghusl before performing Fajr Prayer.

Question

About menstrual spotting

I have a question, I have a spotting and this spotting usually occurs BEFORE my menstrual period. Do I have to break my fast and can I still pray at this moment?

Answer

Spotting is not considered proper menses. Therefore, you are advised to continue praying and fasting until the onset of regular menstrual bleeding.

Question:

InshaAllah whoever is reading this is doing well. My question is specifically about my father, the scenario is a bit long so inshaAllah you can bare with me.

Throughout our lives (me and my 2 brothers) have witnessed my father constantly shouting, humiliating, and disrespecting our mother in front of us, extended family members, and or even guests. These fights also included us, anything we did was blamed on our mother and she once again endure the constant humiliation of name-calling, stress, and emotional distress almost every day of her married life (at least for 25 years that I remember).
This constant negativity and the toxic relationship had affected me and my brothers in many ways emotionally and mentally, seeing my mother constantly humiliated made me hate living in that house. My elder brother moved out when he was 21 years old due to the constant arguments and fights between him and my father.
My father’s form of punishment for his children was the stick, slaps, verbal and emotional abuse, which we learned to endure and move past it. However, once he was beating my small brother and he would look at my mom and say “So this is what’s bothering you? Ya ok so watch this” so he would continue to beat my brother even more just to upset my mom further.
On one occasion around 10 years ago, my father asked me do you think me and your mom should get divorced? and I said Yes.
Many years passed, and they continued arguing and fighting on a regular basis, my father would call my brother to complain about my mother and my mother to me. There was a time my mother suffered from Bell’s palsy due to constant stress and went through treatment for almost a month. When the fighting and constant problems didn’t stop, and my younger brother was starting to go through what we went through, my elder brother advised my parents to get a divorce.
Neither took the advice and they continued to stay married.
They currently are still married but live in separate rooms, according to my father my mother told him that “their time is up” and hence my father moved out of the room. My father is 100% convinced that me or my brother are the ones who told my mother to say or do that (of course we didn’t, I had no idea what he is talking about until yesterday when he insisted it was us), and holds us accountable for this.
Now my question is: My father holds me and my brother accountable for advising them to get divorced and that was not permissible and we should repent for thinking of something like that, (even though they didn’t take that advice). He blames us for them not being able to share the same room (even though we didn’t say or do what he claims we said) he is sure that this is our fault, and he threatened us that we will be asked on the day of judgment for creating this situation.
Please clarify what is the ruling on such matters, what is the right way to clear this situation, and whether it is our fault because we advised them to get divorced.

Thank you for your patience

Answer:

I empathize with your situation and pray to Allah to give resolve this issue peacefully and amicably.

Your father is shirking his responsibility towards his wife and children. Allah orders husbands to treat their wives kindly.

Allah says, “And consort with them in a kind and honorable way; for if you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing in which God has placed much good.” (Qur’an: 4: 19)

This is an order from Allah to husbands that they must treat their wives honorably and must do so even if they find some dislikable traits in them. The Prophet (peace be upon him) further stated, “No believing man should hate his believing wife; if he finds a trait of character that he dislikes in her, he will surely find another trait that is pleasing in her.” Therefore, husbands ought to overlook the weaknesses of their wives and ought to treat them most kindly.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) embodied this virtue in his treatment of his wives and children. He also said, “The best of you is the one who treats his family most kindly.” He said, “Only a nobleman shall treat women honorably, and only the most wretched person shall dishonor women.” Since he has been abusive towards his wife and children, he must take responsibility for his abusive behavior.

So as a conscientious Muslim, he should take responsibility for his past mistakes, apologize to his wife, seek repentance, and change his behavior.

If, instead of doing that, he persists in blaming you for his failed marriage, he will end up destroying himself, his family, and his salvation.

Having said this, I advise you to continue being gentle with your parents while pointing out their mistakes; you also ask yourself how far you have contributed to worsening relations. Islam teaches us to engage in self-examination and take steps to correct ourselves to appear before Allah with a clear conscience. Allah says, “The Day when neither wealth nor children will be of any benefit. Only those who come before Allah with a pure heart ˹will be saved˺.” (Qur’an: 26: 88-89)

Question:

Recently I have come across a lot of fiqh that conflicts about entertainment

Answer:

Although it is easy for one to get confused over the diversity of views in fiqh, especially on issues relating to entertainment, it is not hard to draw certain lines and establish some criteria to sort things out and find a solution that satisfies the requirements of common sense and moral conscience.

First, we must remember Islam is a natural way of life or Deen al-Fitrah. Therefore, it caters to all the basic human needs, physical, mental, moral, social, and spiritual.

Since humans need outlets to recuperate, destress and recharge, Islam allows for clean entertainment. Ali ibn Abi Talib says, “Hearts get tired even as bodies get tired, so release its tensions by resorting to entertaining wisdom.” He also said, “Give outlets for the hearts with some entertainments here and now; if you force it to overwork, it will go blind.” Abu al-Darda said: I use some innocent entertainments to strengthen my soul to work for the truth.”

Therefore, a Muslim may use clean entertainment while avoiding extremes. However, here are some strict guidelines to adhere to:

1. They must be free of all vices, obscenities, nudity, and unethical scenes or messages.
2. One must never do them at the expense of obligatory duties or more significant priorities.
3. They must never be addictive. 
4. One should avoid extremes; instead, one should keep the balanced approach that the Prophet established for us: “Indeed your Lord has rights over you; your body has rights over you, your spouse has rights over you; so, give each one their dues.” (Al-Bukhari) 

Question:

I’m gamer.I play game which is usually child friendly game and have zero violence, bad language and nudity will be censored. Can I still choose the career to be a gamer or change career in future?

Answer:

I advise you to choose another career, although there is no harm if you take this one as an occasional pastime. A conscientious Muslim should avoid careers that may inadvertently lead to wasting our precious time in frivolities. We must always remember how we would answer Allah. The Prophet said, “The feet of a person will not move forward on the Day of Judgment until they are questioned about four things: Life span: how they spend it; Their knowledge: What did they do with it; About their wealth: How they earned it and how they spent it; their body: How they used it. (At-Tirmidhi)

Question:

I would like to request a fatwah regarding ejaculation without committing Zina or masturbaiting. During my fast my genital has been stimulated through the rubbing of my body against my bed while moving , this causing ejaculation. My intention was to get temporarily aroused but not ejaculate. Will the fast still be accepted and is it mandatory for me to repeat the fast?

Answer:

You must never indulge in this sinful act, especially while fasting. Doing so invalidated your fast and violated the month’s sanctity. Therefore, I urge you to repent to Allah and beg for His mercy; you also ought to make up the fasts you invalidated by engaging in this sinful act.

Question:

Who wrote the earliest biography of prophet Muhammad ( pbuh ) and is Ibn Ishaq reliable? Can you explain these Ahadith:-Sahih Al-Bukhari 1:11:664,Sahih Muslim 5:2334,Ishaq: 243,’Ishaq: 450’’,Al-Tabari, Vol. 2, p. 11, p. 11.

Answer:

I am at a loss to discern the real purport of your question. You seem to be an Islamophobic person or brainwashed by Islamophobia propaganda.

You might do well to remember the wise words of a pious Christian priest who reminded the Crusaders who were bent on fighting Islam: They may do well to remember that the harder they try to hit Islam, the higher and higher like a ball. So, this fact alone should convince them that Islam is not the work of the Devil.

You should know that even when we are saying these, people all over the world embrace Islam; they come from diverse religious and ideological backgrounds. No other religion has been relentlessly attacked like Islam, yet it remains the fastest-spreading religion in the world.

Question:

Overview-swallowed twice despite there being a taste in my mouth. I made some buttercream for a cake and tasted it. I spit it out, then swallowed , realised I could taste the flavour, don’t know what I was thinking, I swallowed again hoping i was mistaken that it wasnt flavour I’d just swallowed. I think I did this twice in panic. My logic only kicked in after when I remembered to needed to wash my mouth. My concern was I swallowed Despite there being a taste in my mouth, I wasn’t thinking properly. I’m worried what this means

Answer:

If you did not swallow the food but only tasted and spit it out, then your fast is still valid; otherwise, you broke your fast, and you need to make up for it unless it was by accident, in which case you are excused, and there is no need to make it up as the fast is still valid.

Question:

Can u pray 2 nafl for yourself for the future so u can get the reward efter ur death?2. Can u pray 4 nafal for 2 people at the same time? Ex. I want to pray nafl for my grandmother and grandfather so can I pray 4 nafl together for both of them or I have to pray 2nafl for one each?
Thank you!

Answer:

You may offer supplications for others even as you do it for yourself. However, there is no precedent for offering Salah, whether Fard or Nafl, on behalf of others. If it had been good, the Prophet would have set a precedent or advised us, and his companions and pious predecessors would have practiced it. But, unfortunately, there is nothing in the sources to that effect.

So, I would advise you to offer nafl prayers for your benefit while praying for them by making supplications.

Question:

I have these intrusive thoughts while praying and reading Quran where my mind is cursing Allah but I don’t mean any of these, will I still get bad deeds. I try to divert my mind by saying Allah hu akbar and stuff but these bad thoughts don’t stop will I go to hell How do I stop this?

Answer:

You don’t need to worry about such doubts as long as you do not dwell on them and repelled them.

Imam Muslim reports on the authority of Abu Hurayrah that the Companions of the Prophet (peace be upon him) once complained to him: “Often such thoughts occur in our minds of which we do not even dare to speak about?’. The Prophet said, “that is pure faith!”

Explaining this hadith, Imam An-Nawawi says, “We are not accountable for the flashes of thoughts or self-talks that assail our minds as long as we do not dwell on them. That is the consensus of scholars; that is what the above hadith intends. Such thoughts may even include sins such as ghibah (thinking or speaking evil of others) and words of infidelity”.

The fact that one does not allow himself to pursue such thoughts and feels bad about them and finds it sinful even to divulge them shows true faith. In other words, no human being can be free of such doubts and whisperings from Satan, but no sooner such thoughts occur to a believer, he must repel them and seek refuge in Allah.

Allah says, “If any suggestion from Satan assails you, seek God’s protection, for He hears and knows (all things). Those who bring (God) to mind when an evil thought from Satan assails them are reminded (of their allegiance to God), and suddenly they can see again! However, their (evil) ‘brothers’ will always seek to plunge them into error, and they never let up.” (Qur’an: 7: 200-202).

Therefore, I urge you to seek refuge in Allah from the whisperings of Satan. And make sure to arm yourself always with dhikr and dua. For there is no better weapon to defeat Satan than dhikr and dua: It is reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Satan runs through the blood veins of the children of Adam; however, when they remember Allah, he retreats immediately.”

Question:

My question is that I am in the educational Consultancy business and we act as intermediates between the students and universities for admission we provide consultancy to students and admission then in different colleges and universities across the world and universities provide us commissions for each admission now I want to clarify whether this is correct according to Islam or not.

There’s also an important point I would like to mention that this process will be very difficult for students or their parents to complete the formalities and choosing right colleges as per their requirements and our role is to provide them guidance assist in Documentation and completing University formalities etc., and the case with commission there are few institutions that provide commission and some institutes doesn’t provide any commission and in that case we charge from the student some amount as service charges

Answer:

I see nothing wrong with receiving a commission for your work. From what you have described, you are rendering a beneficial service. Hence, you may receive a fair amount of compensation for the same. Whether you receive payment from the university or the students does not make any difference if you do not charge unfair charges or indulge in exploitative practices. If you waive the fees of those who cannot afford it, you will merit even more incredible blessings and rewards from Allah. 

Question:

I have a necklace which belongs to an acquaintance of mine, which we thought was misplaced/stolen but years later I found it in my old stuff, now I have lost touch with that person and don’t know where she is, what should I do with it?

Answer:

It would be best if you did not keep it in your possession; instead, give it to a reputable charity.

Question:

I’m interested in creating my own label/brand where I would sell clothes I design and make, modest & immodest. Is that halal? And In uni, some of our creations must be modelled. If I choose a fully covered, Hijab etc design, is that okay?

Also I live in the UK and would want to sell my clothes worldwide. Of course the UK is a non Muslim country so if I sell immodest designs, any non Muslims who buy it will probably use it for haram since my immodest designs include short skirts, crop tops etc. However, I don’t feel like I’m responsible for that? Even in a Muslim country, they could be used for haram so I don’t really know anymore. Surely it’s not haram to sell immodest clothes since women need these kinda clothes even when they’re with their friends etc but again, it is very possible and extremely likely that it will be used for haram in a non Muslim country. What should I do?
Thank you

Answer:

You can create your label/brand and design and sell modest clothes. However, you are not allowed to design and sell the immodest clothes. By doing so, you condone nudity and immodesty, thus contributing to corruption and promiscuous behavior in society.

You may ask: what is wrong with the immodest clothes if they wear them in the privacy of their homes?

The answer is that outlets selling such clothes are regularly frequented by those who are promiscuous and addicted to a carefree lifestyle. Therefore, according to principles of jurisprudence, when haram and halal are mixed, the aspect of haram is given priority, and the ruling is given accordingly. Furthermore, that which leads to haram is also haram.

Therefore, I urge you to specialize in designing modest clothes only; if you do so with the sincere intention of earning a lawful source of living, Allah will bless it, and your business will flourish with the grace of Allah.

You may do well to know that a penny earned lawfully is more blessed than a million dollars earned through unethical and unlawful means.

Question:

Is it allowed to name my baby boy Zaviyar in Islam

Answer:

There is no harm in naming your baby boy Zaviyar. The word means bold or a person with a lion’s heart.

Question:

 I follow that a dog in itself is not impure, its hair is pure but its saliva, urine and poop is impure. Even if the hair of the dog is pure I have read a fatwa that says if the dog is wet we have to wash our hand or cloth 7 times if touched, because the wetness is most probably from the dog licking itself. But what is the ruling on a rainy day? If it rains and a dog becomes wet because of the rain, will it be regarded as pure or impure, as it may have licked its body from before? Similarly, after raining if a dry dog walks on a rain-soaked road or puddle, or sits in a wet place will that place or puddle be regarded as pure or not?

Answer:

There is no need for you to be overly confused over this issue. Islam is a practical religion that is easy to practice. I would give you the Islamic teachings on the purity of dogs; you can judge the specific issues you are facing. 

A dog in itself cannot be considered wholly unclean, although its saliva has been considered as such by most scholars. That notwithstanding, the Qur’an clearly states that we can teach the dogs to catch games for us to consume. 

Based on this and other evidence in the sources, scholars have concluded that there is no objection to using dogs for beneficial services, including hunting, shepherding cattle, guarding, policing, etc. 

Regarding the issues of purity and impurity, we should do our best to avoid coming into direct contact with the dog’s saliva. Since it would be hard to do so, we will be excused as long as we do our best to keep ourselves clean using bacterial soup and water. The rigor of the laws will be relaxed in such a case because of exceptional circumstances.

That is the ruling of jurists like Imam Ibn Taymiyya for the shepherds and others who use dogs for essential services. Therefore, they cannot avoid coming in direct contact with dogs and their saliva. The principle of jurisprudence, ‘where there is a real hardship, the rigor of the laws is relaxed’, therefore, must be applied here. Allah says, “Allah wills that you shall have ease, and does not will you to suffer hardship.” (Qur’an: 2:185)

Question:

I am a young boy in college in the US. Where girls are over sexualized and it’s hard not to at least think haram thoughts which leads to a rabbit hole of watching women online which often leads to masturbation. I have tried reducing such things on social media and other online sources but even then once a while I feel the urge to let do this bad habit. I want a solution to what to do to reduce the frequency and completely stop this habit.

Answer:

Since watching porn is a highly pernicious habit that destroys your spiritual soul and thus leads to self-destruction, you must urgently summon your willpower and take all the steps you can muster to wean yourself immediately.

 To empower yourself to achieve this, seek beneficial counseling and therapy, preferably from those professionals in the field who are conscientious Muslims; if such Muslim professionals are not available from those who are ethically and morally conscious. You need to wean yourself of these pernicious habits; the consequences of persisting in them are simply unthinkable; they would undoubtedly corrode your spiritual soul and cause your spiritual death.

Sins are addictive, for it is in the very nature of the carnal soul to seek pleasure in sins. As mam al-Busiri has rightly said, “Carnal soul is a like a baby; if you neglect him, he will grow up clinging on to the breast milk forever, but if you wean him off, he will be weaned off.” I suggest a few tips which you can use to empower yourself:

1) Visualize and meditate on the horror of this heinous sin and conjure up images of hellfire as painted in the Qur’an and the Sunnah as many times as possible until such time that whenever you are tempted to visit such sites or view such scenes will constantly play in the screen of your mind; thus even as you have associated this addiction with pleasure, you will come to associate it with pure pain and suffering.

2) Convince yourself—by taking all measures such as listing all the negative things about such habits and listing the verses and traditions about the gravity of sins—of the urgency of removing this cancer from your life; remember it is much more severe than cancer attacking your body since your soul survives you even after your physical body has disintegrated in the earth.

3) Imagine how terrible a loss you would face were you to die while being addicted to this most heinous sin?

4) Seek strength from Allah by crying to Him for succor, but you can never seek the help of Allah unless you seek to establish a connection with Him through regular Prayers, so never be slack in Your Prayers.

 5) Schedule your time so that you are never left with any time to think of such matters; Imam Shafi said: “If you don’t occupy your mind with good works, your carnal soul will make you busy with evil deeds!”

 6) Surround yourself with spiritual and Islamic influences and immerse yourself in them.

 7) Always hang around with good Muslims who are busy doing good works; join a halaqah where spiritual training is imparted together with a study of Islam

 8) Make your mind and tongue busy with dhikr Allah; say the following words and others frequently:

 Subhaana Allaah; al-hamdu li Allah; laa ilaaha illa Allaah, Allaahu akbar;

 wa laa hawla walaa quwwata illaa bi Allaah; astaghfir Allaaha al-azeem min kulli dhanbin wa atoobu ilaahi

 (Glory be to Allah; praise be to Allah; there is no god, but Allah, Allah is Great; there is no power or strength except by the will of Allah; I ask forgiveness of Allah from all my sins and repent to Him.)

9) Once you have been weaned off these pernicious habits, you should seriously consider marriage; marriage protects against temptations.

 I pray that the Beneficent Lord of Mercy save us all from the evil inclinations of our souls and make us hate disbelief, transgressions, and sins; and may He endear to our hearts faith and good works- Aameen.

Question:

I have a question that so hard to answer but insha allah I’ll get answer for it. I I’ve been in relationship for one year and we came to the big decision that we want to get married. We both Muslims and very strongly committed to our deen. I live in USA and he lives in another country. So I told my family and they said as long he’s a Muslim they don’t have any problem. But he’s family they’re not agreeing for him to get married to me. And the biggest thing is that I seen him but my family never meet him before. So my family they want someone from he’s side to come and purpose for my hands. But he doesn’t not have anyone in the US. So the question is, is it possible to get married without he’s wakel? And without his father’s consent?

Answer:

I genuinely empathize with your predicament. 

To answer your answer in detail, let me first state a few points upfront:

First, marriage in Islam is a partnership based on mutual respect, kindness, and mercy. Therefore, there is no room in Islam for forced marriages. Instead, the parties involved should

choose for themselves. Otherwise, marriage cannot be a source of peace and

tranquility. 

 Allah says, “Among His signs is that He created spouses from among yourselves for you to relate with them in peace, and He implanted in your hearts love and mercy. In these

are signs for people who reflect.” (Qur’an: 30: 21)

 Therefore, Islam provides insight to make the right choices in this most crucial area of life, lest we get carried away by emotions. Youthfulness and lack of experience may force us to make rash judgments. We may regret our decisions if we rush to marriage without due reflection. Faced with life’s overwhelming challenges, marriages may end up in failure.

 For these reasons, Islam provides certain safeguards: The Prophet (peace be upon him) has warned us against choosing marriage partners based solely on material considerations such

as physical beauty, attraction, wealth, or family status; instead, one should stress faith and character as top priorities. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “If someone with sound faith and character proposes to marry your daughter, do not reject it; otherwise, you may open the door to corruption in the land.” (ٌAt-Tirmidhi)

 Another safeguard, Islam provides us with the guidance of guardians and parents. Since they have greater wisdom from lived experience, they should be able to help their sons and

daughters to make the right choices. 

However, while saying this, we must always maintain the fact that the role of a guardian in marriage is to merely guide their children – both sons and daughters- to make choices and not to force them to marry those they dislike. Therefore, when it comes to the consent of parents or guardians, Islam places a more significant role for them in the marriage of their daughters than their sons. That is because women are more likely to be exploited by wicked men. Therefore, a woman’s marriage is conditional on the consent of her guardian. However, even in such a case, Islam does not allow a guardian to refuse consent based on whimsical reasons. In other words, if the guardian refuses to agree to marriage for un-Islamic considerations such as tribalism or race, she may get married by using legal channels.

For details, you may consult the following answer:

As for men, a parent’s consent is not an absolute requirement. According to the consensus of scholars, in Islam, an adult male who is sober and in full possession of his mind may marry without the consent of anyone, including their parents. Since marriage is his right, he is free to discharge it for his benefit even though he may buy, sell, or engage in transactions freely.

Having said this, I urge him to try his best to persuade his parents to consent or bless this marriage. If they still do not agree, then he is free to get married without their permission.

However, it would be best if you did it legally by following the country’s laws so that you have recourse to the legal protection in case of unforeseen circumstances.