As salamu alaykum sister,

Shokran for writing into our live session.  It is clear dear sister that you are experiencing deep remorse for your relationship with this guy.  The fact that you did not have feelings for him from the first time that you met him, should have been a clue that he was not for you.  Yet somehow you were enticed to believe that he was good-or was going to change whatever behaviors that were haram, but he did not.

Sister, just because you were not feeling this guy does not mean you are heartless, regardless of what others say.  It is your feelings-and you were right and should have followed your first instincts about him and left him alone but you did not in the hopes that he would change. Many sisters wait on brother’s who promise to change, promise to do this or that, yet never do.   Some waste a lifetime waiting, alhumdulilah you did not. You are not the first sister that has fallen for ‘sweet words and promises” and you won’t be the last, but alhumdulilah you saw through his words and withdrew from this relationship.  Allah is most forgiving.

Sister, this relationship is now in the past.  If you made sincere repentance to Allah, please leave it in the past.  I know it may be hard to move on, but please insha’Allah trust in Allah’s mercy, forgiveness and love for you.  You deserve so much better than this.  Trust that Allah has forgiven you as He said He would-and move on.  In the future dear sister, please do trust your instincts, make duaa to Allah swt for guidance and seek to keep things halal in all manners of getting to know a potential spouse.

Your past need not haunt you my sister for it is just that – the past.  You have given it to Allah by seeking forgiveness so leave it with Allah, now move on insha’Allah, planning for a much more brighter and happier future.  You are in our prayers, we wish you the best.