Did Muhammad Marry Women for Sexual Gratification?

04 August, 2017
Q Why did Muhammad marry several women? Did he do so for sexual gratification?

Answer

Salam Dear Sister,

Thank you for your question and for contacting Ask About Islam.

Whenever Prophet Muhammad’s name emerges, the image in many people’s minds is a man with many wives.

For Muslims, his multiple marriages had meaning and immense implications for Islam, and by extension, the history of the world.

Needless to say, the issue remains controversial, and as such, any study of the matter requires an objective approach.  Therefore, we will endeavour to tackle this topic by being as objective as possible.

His Drive to Spread Islam

The Prophet Muhammad was driven by the goal to ensure that his mission as the Messenger of God was fulfilled and to establish a society based on God’s commands, and not his own.

In order to achieve this goal, he did everything that was humanly possible: he forged relations with the various tribes of Arabia, concluded peace treaties with his sworn enemies and kept relations with the heads of various tribes, nations and religions.

Taken together, his marriages were one way by which he fostered relationships with various influential tribes.

If one were to view the marriages of the Prophet from this context, the motivating factors behind his marriages become clear.

It would be very simplistic and incorrect to view his marriages as being merely for lustful ends.

Context of His Marriages

Let us now briefly examine the context of some of his marriages to see whether this was the case.

From the outset, it is of ultimate importance to note that, except for one of his wives, all of his eleven wives were widowed or divorced. Most were in fact widowed.

Khadijah, 45 Year Old Widow

His first marriage was to a widow named Khadijah, who had been married twice and whom he married when she was forty years old and he was twenty five.  She was the first woman to embrace Islam.

She provided great consolation to him throughout his life and he continued to remember her in his later years as his most beloved wife.

He stayed with her faithfully for 25 years until her death, at which time he was 50 years old, and she was 65 years old.

If he was driven by lustful desires as accused by his opponents, he could have married several, beautiful young women in a society where having numerous wives was a norm – there would be no reason to faithfully remain with an older woman until the age of 50.

This single fact would be sufficient to totally refute the charges against him in this regard.  However, an examination of all of his marriages, as we shall see, should put this question to rest.

Sawda, 65 Year Old Widow

After Khadija’s death, he married another widow, Sawda, who was 65 years old.

She and her previous husband, Sakran, were among those who had immigrated to Ethiopia, fleeing from the oppression and persecution of the Meccans.

It was during their return to Mecca that her husband had died. Seeing her difficult condition, the Prophet married her.

Aisha, His Only Virgin Wife

Then he married Aisha, daughter of his lifelong friend and companion Abu Bakr.

Aisha had first been betrothed to Jabir bin Mut’im at the age of 5. Child marriages were evidently the norm at that time.

She was the only virgin among the Prophet’s wives and the only one who was born into a Muslim family.

One of the Prophet’s goals in this marriage was to strengthen the bond of his brotherhood with Abu Bakr, who was his main defender against the Meccans. Second, Aisha was of a lineage known for honor and intelligence.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) knew that she would tremendously benefit his nation (ummah) by transmitting crucial knowledge from his life, especially family and personal matters that others were not privy to.

Indeed, the Prophet advised his community to learn half of the knowledge of the religion from Aisha.

The foresight of the Prophet proved itself, for she would live for 45 years after his death, and thus became one of the main sources of Prophetic wisdom and knowledge.

Umm Salama, Widow, Single Mother of 4

He married another widow, Umm Salama. Her previous husband, Abu Salama, was martyred in the Battle of Uhud, leaving behind four orphans.

Umm Salama was pregnant at that time and was extremely distressed and very sad. Needless to say, she needed much support.

After her delivery, Umar proposed that the Prophet marry her. The Prophet accepted the proposal and married her.

What purpose can there be for a person of 54 to marry a widow with four orphans except love, mercy and compassion?

There was another crucial factor in this marriage: Umm Salama was from the Bani Makhzum tribe, which was the tribe of Islam’s arch enemies at that time, Abu Jahl and Khalid bin Waleed.

Though Abu Jahl never changed, Khalid later accepted Islam and became a brilliant military general.  Once again, bringing influential and powerful tribes closer to Islam was one of the noble objectives of the Prophet’s marriages.

Zaynab bint Jahsh, 38 Year Old Divorcee

He married a divorced woman, Zaynab, the daughter of Jahsh. She was married to Zayd bin Haritha, the freed slave of the Prophet.

She was the cousin of the Prophet, being the daughter of his paternal aunt. Zayd divorced her and the Prophet married her when she was 38 years old.

His marriage to Zaynab was aimed at emphasizing the invalidity of the age-old Arab practice of taking adopted sons as real sons.

The marriage was divinely sanctioned, as stated in the Quran,

When Zayd had come to the end of his union with her, We gave her to you in marriage … (Quran 33:37)

True Reason Behind Polygyny

From the above, we see that it was not the Prophet’s whims and desires that initiated his marriages, but rather it was that God had planned his marriages.

He commanded His Messenger after the last marriage (with Maymuna) not to marry any more (Quran 33:52), because by that time the objectives of his marriages were achieved as the Prophetic mission was near to completion.

Nothing Wrong With Desiring Sexual Fulfillment

All of this does not mean that the Prophet was not interested in sex.

He was surely attracted by sex and beauty, and was not a prude in expressing it. He said,

…perfume and women are made dear to me.  However, the joy of my eye is in prayer.

In fact, a look at his life would suggest that he approached the various aspects of human life with moderation – be it eating, drinking, or enjoying time with his wives – never indulging in any one thing excessively.

It would be relevant here to quote a female, Western scholar, Karen Armstrong, the author of Muhammad: A Prophet for Our Time, in relation to the issue of Prophets marriages and polygamy in Islam:

“The Quranic institution of polygamy was a piece of social legislation. It was designed not to gratify the male sexual appetite, but to correct the injustices done to widows, orphans, and other female dependents, who were especially vulnerable. All too often, unscrupulous people seized everything and left the weaker members of the family with nothing. Polygamy was designed to ensure that unprotected women would be decently married, and to abolish the old loose, irresponsible liaisons; men could have only four wives and must treat them equitably; it was an unjustifiably wicked act to devour their property. The Quran was attempting to give women a legal status that most Western women would not enjoy until the nineteenth century.  The emancipation of women was a project dear to the Prophet’s heart…”

I hope this helps answer your question.

Salam and please keep in touch.


This is from AboutIslam’s archives and was published in October 2016

Satisfy your curiosity and check out these other helpful links:

Addressing Misconceptions about Prophet’s Marriage to `A’ishah

 

Why Did Muhammad Keep His Nine Wives?

 

Khadijah & Muhammad’s Life: Love Into Action

 

https://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/about-muhammad/prophets-wisdom-dealing-wives/

 

https://aboutislam.net/reading-islam/about-muhammad/prophets-favorite-perfume/

 

About Ibrahim Malabari
Ibrahim H. Malabari is the President and Founder of Messenger of Mercy Foundation, Toronto.