Answer
Wa `alaykum As-Salamu waRahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
In this fatwa:
If your wife had told you (prior to your marriage) that she would continue her professional career after marriage and would not move out of her parents’ home, then you cannot insist that she leaves her job and move with you. Otherwise, she should be willing to move out and live with you.
In responding to your question about undergoing HIV test before marriage, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and an Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:
I am sorry to hear about your predicament. I pray to Allah to help you find an amicable way of reconciling your differences.
If your wife had told you (prior to your marriage) that she would continue her professional career after marriage and would not move out of her parents’ home, then you cannot insist that she leaves her job and move with you.
Otherwise, she should be willing to move out and live with you. Her priority at this stage is to care for her daughter, especially in her formative years. However, she may go back to work after taking a parental leave of one year or two.
If she insists otherwise, you may still continue the marriage as long as you are OK with it.
I would advise that you speak to an imam or a wise person in the community who can help to counsel both of you; if that does not help you should go for professional counseling.
I suspect that there are far more serious issues at stake; and a counselor can help you sort out the issues and help you find an amicable resolution.
I would also urge you to pray to Allah to reconcile your differences and bring back love and affection into your hearts.
Finally, for some useful tips as to how to strengthen your marriage, please study the book, Blissful Marriage: A Practical Islamic Guide by Ekram Beshir.
Allah Almighty knows best.
Editor’s note: This fatwa is from Ask the Scholar’s archive and was originally published at an earlier date.