Answer
Answer:
As-Salaamu ‘Alaikum,
Thank you for placing your trust in our ability to propose a solution to your current situation.
I understand that your depressive state is a result of the abusive treatment you received from your schoolmates when you were younger. You have successfully overcome all negativity through weight-lifting and exercising which clearly proved to be very good for you. However, although you tried to overcome depression, you did not completely remove it from your system.
In most of the cases, depression is the result of difficult life circumstances, grief, failure, or in your case, physical and verbal abuse. Such circumstances create feelings of sadness because you are not satisfied with what you have faced and are succumbed to the negativity brought by the onset of the events.
For you to overcome such feelings, you need to train your mind to realize that your difficult time is now your past. You were successful in overcoming it because you had a strong will power. You were stronger than those insults, and you did not let them define who you are. You have moved on now, and you must realize this.
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In addition, your lifestyle greatly determines your psychological and physical health. You can make changes to your lifestyle to ensure that you do not relapse.
Meditate Often
Calmness is achieved from the inside. When you experience yourself nearing a depressive episode, start to deep breathe. Deep breathing is one of the best ways in which one can relax. It is a form of focusing your attention on the breathing rather than other internal fears which are slowly developing.
As a Muslim, you can best meditate by prayer and dhikr (remembrance of Allah).
Allah (swt) says in the Quran,
“…Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” (13:28)
Anxiety, sadness, and despair tend to deviate us from believing in the power of Allah (swt). So, remember Allah (swt) often. Your degree of happiness depends on your level of connection with Allah (swt). Therefore, call unto Him and tell Him of your worries. Seek guidance from Him.
Allah (swt) says in the Quran,
“O you who have believed, seek help through patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with the patient.” (2:153)
To achieve emotional calm and patience, pray often to Allah (swt). Call on Him often. Use His names to glorify Him. There is a solution for every problem in the world in the Quran, be it physical, emotional, or psychological.
Allah (swt) says in the Quran,
“…Indeed, Allah is Hearing and Seeing.” (58:1)
The Power of Istighfar
Ask Allah’s (swt) forgiveness daily. Allah (swt) says in the Quran:
”And O my people, Ask forgiveness of your Lord and then repent to Him. He will send [rain from] the sky upon you in showers and increase you in strength [added] to your strength.” (11:52)
”And said, ‘Ask forgiveness of your Lord. Indeed, He is ever a Perpetual Forgiver.” (71:10)
Remember, even the blessed Prophet Muhammad (saw) used to make Istighfar 75-100 times a day!
Eat Healthy
As insignificant it may sound, eating healthy and removing all sorts of fat and added sugar to your diet can have an unbelievable positive effect on your overall health, whether be it physical, emotional, or spiritual. Not only does healthy eating improve physical health, it also releases certain neurotransmitters which are good for your overall health and emotions likewise.
Continue to Exercise
Exercising is the best way to feel happier and more relaxed. It releases various chemicals in the brain which leaves you feeling stress-free and better about yourself. Exercising regularly also boosts your confidence levels, improves self-esteem, and clears your mind of unwanted, depressing thoughts. It builds motivation and positive mental attitude. In addition, it also improves your physical health which is very important.
Be Positive
You are not a bad person. In fact, Jannah is created for people who sin but repent. Allah (swt) loves those who seek forgiveness.
Messenger of Allah (saw) said, “Were you not to commit sins, Allah would create people who would commit sins and ask for forgiveness and He would forgive them” (Muslim)
Everyone makes mistakes; everyone undergoes hardships, failures, insults, setbacks, obstacles, etc. However, this does not make them a bad individual. These are tests of the life. As Muslims, we should embrace optimism and have trust in Allah’s (swt) ability to resolve all our matters and ease all our affairs.
Seek Help
You mentioned that you had started feeling depressed and started doing self-harm as a result of the bullying and abuse in your school. If you are undergoing any sort of abuse and bullying at the moment, please seek help from those you can trust. In addition, you should also consult a psychologist or a local counselor who can talk you through your thoughts and help you feel better.
I hope that I provided the answer that you were looking for. I pray that you overcome depression once again and live a life always filled with positivity.
Salam,
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