What you describe here does sound like you went through child abuse, both in the physical and the emotional level. Hitting you and locking you outside of the house are what we might call physical abuse, whereas making you feel like imperfect and making you feel like responsible for your mother’s potential death might be emotional abuse. Today, these left you feeling anxious when you hear yelling or shouting, even if it’s on the TV. You feel like everything is your fault. These are the negative consequences of what you faced as a child. It’s almost like you are experiencing the symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. So this can be something to explore as well…
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