He always says that I am doing my duty as a father - I provide for them this is the best I can do. I should have had children later in life - I don’t have the bandwidth in life. He also feels bad that I don’t put him first - unfortunately I don’t have a moment to breathe and I can’t bring myself to give him any more care that I give him currently. He doesn’t really do anything in and around the house and when I ask him to, he simply says “do you need me to hire another maid?” How should I deal with this? How can I get him more involved in the lives of his children? How can I help change his mind about his own children? Why is he so regretful?
It must hurt to hear that your husband regrets having children. He may love them, but he feels overwhelmed by their presence.
If this is the case, he still needs to spend time with his kids, as they have the right to be with their father.
It is better to approach him with kindness than to force upon him his duty. Help him understand what he might miss if he does not get involved with his family enough.
You may try family counseling and discuss your differing needs with a professional.
Check out the full advice here.
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