05 June, 2022
Q
Assalamu Alaykom wa RahmatAllahi wa Barakatu
Background:
I’ve been married since 2015 and I was 16. My husband was 23.
I was born in the US, he in Yemen.
We now have a 3yr old born in 2019.
I have been legally blind since 7yrs old.
I recently got diagnosed (2022) with ADHD, PTSD, Bipolar, Depression, and Anxiety.
I self diagnosed myself in 2020. and with research I would explain to my husband why I’m not doing tasks, and how he can be supportive of me while I seek professional help.
At the time of writing this I have not yet received treatment.
I struggle with day-to-day tasks and there are days where I am able to do things and days where I’m in shambles.
My Husband's Reaction to My Mental Health Diagnosis:
“You’re making excuses for why you don’t do anything”
“You pay for your own treatment I have no care for it”
“I don’t want to hear it. If you don’t change now, I will marry over you right when Jamilah afford it”
“All I want is for you to be like a full women and wife”
“If any other man married a girl like you they’d divorce you in an instant!”
“I’m not going to research your disorders! I do not care just change it’s simple”
“I have mental issues now from you! You make me stress”
And many more crushing words.
I’ve been self treating myself until I get treatment
Question:
I’m crumbling, what do I do!? Divorce? Stay and suffer? Wait and see what happens after I’m treated?
I’m lost, overwhelmed, depressed, and walking on eggshells. Living is challenging. I would say I have a close relationship with Allah and He knows how much He has aided and guided me through my iman and healing journey. I’m waiting once He allows the time I receive my treatment inshaAllah soon.
I believe my husband is struggling to find out this news and I’m not sure how else to help him understand I’m not doing this out of carelessness.
Background:
I’ve been married since 2015 and I was 16. My husband was 23.
I was born in the US, he in Yemen.
We now have a 3yr old born in 2019.
I have been legally blind since 7yrs old.
I recently got diagnosed (2022) with ADHD, PTSD, Bipolar, Depression, and Anxiety.
I self diagnosed myself in 2020. and with research I would explain to my husband why I’m not doing tasks, and how he can be supportive of me while I seek professional help.
At the time of writing this I have not yet received treatment.
I struggle with day-to-day tasks and there are days where I am able to do things and days where I’m in shambles.
My Husband's Reaction to My Mental Health Diagnosis:
“You’re making excuses for why you don’t do anything”
“You pay for your own treatment I have no care for it”
“I don’t want to hear it. If you don’t change now, I will marry over you right when Jamilah afford it”
“All I want is for you to be like a full women and wife”
“If any other man married a girl like you they’d divorce you in an instant!”
“I’m not going to research your disorders! I do not care just change it’s simple”
“I have mental issues now from you! You make me stress”
And many more crushing words.
I’ve been self treating myself until I get treatment
Question:
I’m crumbling, what do I do!? Divorce? Stay and suffer? Wait and see what happens after I’m treated?
I’m lost, overwhelmed, depressed, and walking on eggshells. Living is challenging. I would say I have a close relationship with Allah and He knows how much He has aided and guided me through my iman and healing journey. I’m waiting once He allows the time I receive my treatment inshaAllah soon.
I believe my husband is struggling to find out this news and I’m not sure how else to help him understand I’m not doing this out of carelessness.
Answer
In this counseling answer, Sr. Hannah highlights the importance of social support during recovery from a mental illness. What if you feel they are not there for you?
Try to make them understand what your condition means exactly in day-to-day life: do research, watch videos together.
Intend to get their points: seek underlying reasons behind; such as inability to cope with your illness and denial of your suffering.
Is unsupportive treatment enough reason for divorce?
Click on the audio and find out!
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