In this counseling answer:
•Peace of mind and remembrance of Allah are closely related.
•Seek answers. Knowledge is necessary for understanding Islam and having faith.
•Prayer is in moreover a means of relaxing the entire body, when done with the right mindset and state of mind.
•We pray to Allah not because He SWT needs us, but because we need Him.
•What causes you to feel depressed? Please, seek help from a counselor.
As-salamu Alaikum dear sister,
Thank you for placing your trust in our ability to propose a solution to your current situation. I am sorry to hear of the troubles that you are currently going through.
Dear sister, peace of mind and remembrance of Allah are closely related. In fact, peace of mind is the result of remembrance of Allah.
Allah SWT says in the Quran,
“Those who have believed and whose hearts are assured by the remembrance of Allah. Unquestionably, by the remembrance of Allah hearts are assured.” (Quran 13:28)
In addition, your mother’s advice to return to being punctual in salah is the result of Allah asking you to not let your depressive thoughts intrude your peace.
In the Quran, Allah SWT tells us that he guides who he wills and leads astray who he wills. (2:213)
If Allah SWT had not willed, he would not have made you reconsider your absence from salah, which would have immersed you further in depression. In addition, you would not have thought of making a correlation between your mood and salah.
On the other hand, sister, it would be important to know what causes you to feel depressed to the extent that you stopped praying. I assume something is wrong in your life which led you to listen to the Satan and abandon praying. Please, work on this issue! Try describing what exactly causes you to feel depressed. When do you feel depressed? What kind of thoughts do come to your mind? Track them in a journal to have a clearer picture about your feelings.
I highly encourage you seek help from a counselor. You can even do this online with one of our Aboutislam Counselors:
Intentions Matter More Than Actions
Firstly, let me say that although Muslims are required to pray, fast, read Quran, they are asked by Allah to also give thought to their actions, to ponder and to contemplate. They are not simply asked to follow mindlessly. That is why even when we pray, we are asked to know the meanings of the supplications and verses we say such that it helps create a stronger connection between us and Allah. Even the forbidden things we are asked to keep away from have negative repercussions when we do not obey.
That being the case, seek answers. Answers for everything. Knowledge is necessary for understanding Islam and having faith. Re-evaluate yourself. Why have you stopped praying? Do you know the importance of prayer in Islam?
Prayer is in moreover a means of relaxing the entire body, when done with the right mindset and state of mind. Therefore, seeking knowledge is obligatory on every Muslim male or female.
Dear sister, it is not just the physical act of prayer but rather the intention behind the prayer, the meaning behind prayer, and the conversation we have with Allah SWT during the prayer. It is the connection with Allah SWT that brings peace.
Check out this counseling video
Try to learn about Him. Read books. Open a translated Quran.
To start off, get to know Allah by his 99 names. Start with the name of Al-Wadud, the Ever-Loving. Allah’s love for you is unconditional. Although everyone transgresses and disobeys, Allah never stops looking after. He expects nothing in return from you. Therefore, use his names to call upon him and ask him. Cry to him and ask him. Ask him to guide you.
Allah SWT also mentions in the Quran that He SWT tests the believers with afflictions and gives glad tidings to the ones who are patient.
Allah SWT says in the Quran:
”O you who believe! Do your duty to Allah and fear Him. And seek the Waseela (means of approach to Him), and strive hard in His Cause (as much as you can), so that you may be successful.” (5:35)
In order to get yourself closer to Allah SWT, aside from doing dhikr, get yourself involved in activities, either in community or other extracurricular. These activities will help you overcome your depressive mood and help you find motivation.
It is also of great importance to seek refuge from the Satan. He is our greatest enemy when it comes to getting closer to Allah, and is the one who usually makes us dwell on negativity.
Abu Huraira (RA) reported that the Prophet Muhammad said that Allah the Exalted and Glorious said,
“I am near to the thought of My servant as he thinks about Me, and I am with him as he remembers Me. And if he remembers Me in his heart, I also remember him in My heart, and if he remembers Me in assembly I remember him in assembly, better than his (remembrance), and if he draws near Me by the span of a palm, I draw near him by the cubit, and if he draws near me by the cubit I draw near him by the space (covered by) two hands. And if he walks towards Me, I rush towards him.” (Sahih Muslim).
So, in sha Allah, if you sincerely try to get closer to Allah SWT, he will approach you at a greater speed.
To start off on your path to finding Allah:
•Say Astaghfirullah a lot to erase your sins.
•Say Alhamdulillah so Allah will give you more and for what he has given you Allah SWT possess great power. He is the Creator and the one who reigns over everything.
•Look outside your window and say Subhan-Allah about His beautiful creations.
Dear sister, your mother is right when she says that not praying will bring about negative consequences in this life and the afterlife.
Dear sister, we are praying to Allah not because He SWT needs us, but because we need Him. Allah SWT is the Omnipotent. He is the one who can do everything. When we pray Salaah or fast, we are doing it so that we can gain the pleasure of Allah, the One who owns the entire universe.
Dear sister, disobedience of Allah is wrong, and obviously will bring about the displeasure of Allah, but it is not simply that. When we disobey Allah, we are setting ourselves up for damage as it will become easy to pursue what we should not, hence leading us closer to pain and torment in both our lives.
May Allah guide you always on the right path,
Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.