Fasting Is Extremely Difficult for My Daughter, How to Help? | About Islam
Home > Ask About Parenting > Ramadan > Fasting Is Extremely Difficult for My Daughter, How to Help?

Fasting Is Extremely Difficult for My Daughter, How to Help?

Questioner

D

Reply Date

May 22, 2019

Question

As-salamu`Alaykum dear counselor, I'm a mother of 2 kids, 12 and 4. My eldest daughter is fasting Ramadan Alhamdulelah , but due to long hours of fasting she can not complete her fasting from dawn to dusk. In the mid-day, she feels tired and breaks her fast. I know she is obligated to fast Ramadan, but I feel pity for her. I need your advice on how to encourage her to bear the burden of fasting to get the blessing of the holy month.

Counselor

Answer


Fasting Is Extremely Difficult for My Daughter, How to Help?

In this counseling answer:

•I kindly suggest that when she gets tired, divert her attention with something fun or invigorating that will take her attention off of her fatigue and place it on another interest.

•You may have to do this many times to condition her mind and body and strengthen her resolve. After Iftar, tell her how proud of her you are and how pleased Allah SWT is with her efforts.


As-Salamu alaykum sister,

While I am not an Islamic Scholar, I do suggest encouraging her with positive reinforcement, kind words, and gentle encouragement. It is difficult at this age and we must guide with patience and love insha’Allah. While she is 12, I am not sure of her maturity level as each child is different, however, 12-13 is about the age when children begin fasting.

I kindly suggest that when she gets tired, divert her attention with something fun or invigorating that will take her attention off of her fatigue and place it on another interest.

You may have to do this many times to condition her mind and body and strengthen her resolve. After Iftar, tell her how proud of her you are and how pleased Allah SWT is with her efforts.

karim serageldin & naaila clay

Even if she has failed. By reinforcing the positive it will give her a sense of accomplishment and insha’Allah will inspire her to try harder. Pray with your daughter and make duaa to Allah that she becomes used to fasting and becomes able to complete it. Allah is most merciful.

You’re in our prayers sister please let us know how you are doing.

Salam,

***

Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.

Read more:

He Asked: “Why Do I Need to Fast in Ramadan?”

Teenage Son Isolates Himself During Ramadan

My Wife Forces Our Kids to Fast




About Aisha Mohammad

Aisha received her PhD in psychology in 2000 and an MS in public health in 2009. Aisha worked as a Counselor/Psychologist for 12 years for Geneva B. Scruggs Community Health Care Center in New York. Aisha specializes in trauma, depression, anxiety, substance abuse, marriage/relationships issues, as well as community-cultural dynamics. She is certified in Restorative Justice/ Healing Circles, Conflict Resolution, Mediation, and is also a certified Life Coach. Aisha works at a Family Resource Center, and has a part-time practice in which she integrates healing and spirituality using a holistic approach. Aisha plans to open a holistic care counseling center for Muslims and others in the New York area in the future, in sha' Allah. Aisha is also a part of several organizations that advocate for social & food justice. In her spare time she enjoys her family, martial arts classes, Islamic studies as well as working on her book and spoken word poetry projects.

Add Comment


find out more!