My question is for a friend of mine who has a 7-year-old son who keeps asking his parents when he is going to have a little brother or sister.
The problem is that they have been trying for over six years now but to no avail. They even sought medical advice but were told everything is fine. She ended up using fertility drugs for a while, but they did not work.
My question is, could they go for in-vitro fertilization? They want a child so much and they feel depressed because their son feels lonely.
Answer
As-salamu `Alaikum,
Thank you for writing to us regarding your friend’s concern.
This is really a question that is best handled by our Islamic scholars at the Ask the Scholar. Please submit the question to the Fatwa Section after reading the response from them to a similar question below.
As for dealing with the young boy, the parents have to be very careful not to promise something that is not in their control.
Allah Most High is the Creator, He decides to give and to take life; therefore, the best that the parents can tell the child is to make du`aa’to Allah to grant his parents another child.
Help the child understand that even he is a result of such du`aa’ that his mother and father made. They asked Allah to bless them with a child and then they waited.
At the exact appointed time, Allah Most High caused him, the child, to be born. That is what we call his birthday.
In the same way, he should be told that he should join his parents in making du`aa’ to Allah to give them a baby brother or a sister.
Finally, if it seems that the parents are unable to have any more children, the child should be told that sometimes, Allah, Who knows best, may not answer the du`aa’ and that everyone should be ready and willing to accept that outcome.
The main idea is to not promise the child anything and not to speak on behalf of Allah Most High or predict what His plan is going to be.
And Allah knows best..
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(From Ask About Parenting archives)
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