Answer
Wa alaikum ussalam,
Thank you for sending in your question to our website, sister.
First of all, I would like to congratulate you on your conversion to Islam back in the year 2000, despite the doubts and challenges that you have faced in your journey as a Muslim since then.
I pray that you are able to find your way back to firmness of faith in Islam, and to remain steadfast upon it.
First of all, what you have mentioned about “cultural” Muslims: unfortunately, it is quite true. Many Muslims who were raised by Muslim parents to practice empty religious rituals, without having strong faith based on the foundation of correct belief and authentic Islamic knowledge, end up doing what you have described.
They practice Islam when they are with their families, or when living among other Muslims. But when they are away from their families, or in non-Muslim environments, they give up practicing their religion.
Not only is this a grave sin, but it can also becomes a great trial for converts like yourself. Besides this laid-back attitude towards religious practice, other sinful, vile, and hypocritical actions and behaviors of Muslims born into Muslim families can turn onlookers off from Islam itself.
But we should always remember that just because a Muslim does something, does not make it Islamic.
Secondly, yes, the Muslims are wrought with divisions and dissensions based on differences of opinion in creed, jurisprudence, politics, and interpretation of classical texts, among other areas.
But sister, you should remember that any Muslim who sincerely asks God to guide him or her to the Right Path, and strives to find it, is saved from becoming involved in such differences/sects. When God decides to guide someone to the Truth, nothing can make them swerve away from it.
So you should seek closeness to God, and turn away from the differences among Muslims.
Thirdly, many Muslims struggle to fully understand and appreciate each and every aspects of Islam, especially some verses of the Qur’an.
If there are some verses in the Qur’an that you cannot bring your logic and intellect to “agree with”, then you should strive to just surrender to God and accept that there must be some wisdom in them that you, as a fallible human being with limited intellect, cannot yet fathom.
A Muslim should not turn away from Islam itself, just because they cannot appreciate or understand the reason behind each and every command, law, rule, and tenet of Islam.
Instead, the Muslim should endeavor to seek authentic knowledge that will help them to remove any doubts and confusions about those aspects of Islam that shock/confuse them, which will eventually enable them to understand the justification and wisdom behind them, God willing.
Allah has stated that some verses of the Qur’an, known as mutashabihat, have been revealed precisely as a test of a Muslim’s faith (3:7). So, beware of letting any aspect of the Qur’an dissuade you from practicing Islam, once you have become a Muslim.
Any confusion should lead you to strive to undertake more serious and earnest study of the religion, going deeper into its classical texts & scholarly works to seek answers, and finding righteous teachers who will help you along this path.
Finally, to answer your questions about Pantheism:
– No, it is not true that all is God, and God is all. Rather, God is one. He is Divine. And He created everything. He does NOT reside inside any of His creation.
His knowledge is everywhere, yes, but He is Himself physically in the heavens, firmly established above all of His creation. He has Divine and supreme attributes. He is NOT the same as His creation. Belief in pantheism is kufr (disbelief), according to all Islamic scholars.
– Yes, if you believe in one God, but do not follow the only true religion in existence now, which He has sent down as guidance for mankind i.e. Islam, you could be punished in Hell. This is up to Allah alone. But He says in the Qur’an:
{For, if one goes in search of a religion other than Islam, it will never be accepted from him, and in the life to come he shall be among the lost.} (3:85)
– Yes, surely Allah is all-Merciful to the one who repents for wrong doing, turns back to Him in humility, seeks His forgiveness, and resolves to do righteous deeds henceforth. Allah is not merciful towards the one who dies in a state of denying, rejecting, and disbelieving in Him after he/she has truly understood the truth from God.
However, His mercy overcomes His wrath.
Sister, I advise you to be wary of following your desires, of picking & choosing those beliefs that suit your fancy & agree with your limited, human logic, and which do not challenge you to strive in the only right path that there is on earth: Islam.
The mainstream, pure, and true Islam is clear as day, easily attainable by the sincere Muslim who strives to seek it; who begs Allah to show him or her how to be guided to it.
The key to finding the truth and remaining steadfast upon it lies in establishing a close, deep relationship with Allah and the Qur’an. I hope you will do that.
And Allah knows best. I hope that this answers your question.
Salam. Please stay in touch.
References:
Concept of Pantheism | IslamWeb
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