What Can I Do to Curb My Attraction to Men?
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What Can I Do to Curb My Attraction to Men?

Questioner

Ola

Reply Date

Mar 24, 2019

Question

As-salamu `alaykum. I get easily attracted to men with handsome faces. Do I commit a sin by looking at their faces or eyes? How can I prevent myself from being attracted to them?

Mufti

Answer


Flower - Easily Attracted to Men

Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.


In this fatwa:

1- Every committed Muslim should try his best to behave according to the Commands of Allah.

2- He or she should steer clear of acts that are prohibited as well those acts that might lead to the prohibited or open the gate to temptation and chaos in society.

3- All in all, a Muslim is to conduct him/herself according to the ordinances of Islam to the best of his ability. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said, “The best of you are those of best conduct.” (Al-Bukhari, Muslim and others)

4- When we are in a situation where we look at members of the opposite sex, we should turn our eyes away or lower them.


Responding to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:

In Islam, we must guard ourselves against fornication by taking all necessary steps to do so. One of the most basic steps is to lower our gazes when we come face-to-face with the members of the opposite sex.

Allah Almighty says:

{Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment save to their own husbands or fathers or husbands’ fathers, or their sons or their husbands’ sons, or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or sisters’ sons, or their women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigor, or children who know naught of women’s nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, in order that ye may succeed.} (An-Nur 24:31-32)

Therefore, as soon as we are in a situation where we look at members of the opposite sex we should turn our eyes away or lower them. If any sinful thought comes to our mind, we must make istighfar (ask forgiveness of Allah).

If this is a recurrent problem with you, you are advised to read and meditate on the following supplications:

1- Rabbi qini sharra sam`i, rabbi qini sharra basari, rabbi qini sharra lisani, rabbi qini sharra maniyyee (My Lord, protect me from the evils of my ear, protect me from the evils of my eyes, protect me from the evils of my tongue, protect me from the evils of my private parts.)

2- Allahumma tahhir qalbi wa ahsin farji (O Allah!, cleanse my heart and help me to remain chaste).

Furthermore, if you are in a situation where you can get married, you should do so. If, however, you are not able to do so, you should resort to voluntary fasting to restrain your desires.

Allah Almighty knows best.

Editor’s note: This fatwa is from Ask the Scholar’s archive and was originally published at an earlier date.




About Sheikh Ahmad Kutty

Sheikh Ahmad Kutty is a Senior Lecturer and an Islamic Scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

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