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Unknowingly Lost My Hymen: What to Do?

22 August, 2016
Q As-salamu `alaykum. I'm a 16 year old student. Recently I've discovered what hymens are to the Islamic culture through biology lessons and I'm devastated. I don't know what to do. To be completely honest with you, I was a very sexual person when I was young (12 and 13 years old) and I masturbated and I'm 100% sure I broke my hymen. I'm crying every night and praying and I am depressed and I feel cheap and I disappointed my parents but I can't do anything about it. Every Arabic site I read about this subject just says you probably didn't really break it but I DID! And I need help, please! I pray for forgiveness but I feel like I don't even deserve forgiveness. Please, help me. Keep in mind now I stopped masturbating and when I'd put something in me I didn't know how much of sin it was and didn't know what a hymen was and I was losing my virginity by doing that.

Answer

Sheikh Ahmad Kutty
22 August, 2016

Wa `alaykum as-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Dear sister, thank you for the confidence you place in our site and for your sincere desire to repent and return to Allah Almighty.

You should ask for forgiveness and return to Allah. You should be sure that He Almighty will accept your repentance, forgive you and will grant you ease in all your affairs.

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In his response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and an Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states,

I am sorry to hear your story. I pray to Allah to inspire you to seek repentance and draw closer to Him and find peace and tranquility in His remembrance.

As I can learn from your question, you did tamper with your hymen by resorting to perverse practices which resulted in this condition. Allah’s laws are of two kinds: natural and moral; interfering with these laws leads to consequences. So, you need to recognize this fact and live with it.

Having said this, however, I must rush to add: Islam is all about hope and optimism. Allah is All-Compassionate and Merciful. So, if you have repented and are determined to make amends for your sins, you can rest assured of His forgiveness.

Allah Almighty says, “Say, ‘O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.” (Az-Zumar 39:53)

And says also, “Do they not know that it is Allah Who accepts the repentance of His servants and receives (approves) their charity and that Allah is the Relenting, the Compassionate?” (At-Tawbah 9:104)

So, there is no need for you to wallow in despair. Rather, you should look forward to the mercy of Allah and His support, if you are sincere and willing to take the steps necessary for repentance.

For further details, please refer to the article linked here.

Allah Almighty knows best.