Wa `alaykum As-Salamu waRahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
Answering your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and an Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:
Muslims ought to settle their differences by using the professional methods of counseling.
Muslims ought to train counselors who are knowledgeable in Islamic ethics and norms as well as the scientific methods of counseling and behavioral therapy that are beneficial. Islam teaches us to benefit from wisdom wherever we find them. One of the popular adages states: “Wisdom is the lost article of a believer, and he would claim it as his own wherever he finds it.”
If counseling does not help, then they have to resort to the next step: reconciliation or arbitration.
Once again, it is important to find those with wisdom and training in both Shari`ah, and preferably, also knowledgeable in the laws of the land.
Having said this, I would urge all parties before tying the knot, to take a marriage course. It would also be beneficial to take a course in anger management.
I would also recommend some books/resources such as the following:
1- Blissful Marriage by Ekram Beshir
Allah Almighty knows best.