In this counseling answer:
• Assure them of your love, honor, and respect for them, but explain that Islamically it is your right to marry.
• I would kindly suggest insha’allah that you set a wedding date, and get married regardless of the families feelings. This marriage is between you and your future husband and it is very sad that your and his parents are fighting.
As Salaam Alaykum sister,
Thank you for writing to us. I am sorry to hear what has happened between your and your fiancee’s families that ruined your nikkah. It is a shame when parents cause fighting and disruption in their children’s lives, especially concerning marriage plans.
Fighting Among Families
While I do not know what the fight was about, sister, you need to determine insha’Allah if the argument was valid. Some reasons for a valid dispute would be things discovered-not previously known- which are unIslamic and would hurt you or your future spouse. Still, the conduct of both families even under these circumstances is appalling as this is not how we conduct ourselves as Muslims.
Pursuing the Nikkah: Express Honor, Respect, Love
I would kindly suggest dear sister that if there is no compelling Islamic reason for all this fitnah you inform your parents (and have your fiancee inform his) that this will be resolved one way or another as you both will be getting married regardless. Assure them of your love, honor and respect for them, but explain that Islamically it is your right to marry.
Check out this counseling video:
Give each of your parents a date (the sooner the better) to resolve their differences. Explain to them that this haram behavior is not going to stop your marriage and you would like their blessings of course, but if they refuse then you will have no other option but to marry without them. As you are both adults sister, you do not need your parents’ approval nor their permission as long as you both are Islamically appropriate for each other.
I would kindly suggest insha’allah that you set a wedding date, and get married regardless of the families feelings. This marriage is between you and your future husband and it is very sad that your and his parents are fighting. Insha’Allah they will come to their senses quickly.
Guidance from Qur’an & Duaa
Please do make duaa to Allah swt concerning this situation. Ask Allah swt to put mercy between their hearts. As a peacemaker insha’Allah, remind both families of the following verses from Al-Qur’an,
“So have taqwa (fear and obedience) of Allah and reconcile the differences between yourselves.”(Al-Qur’an 8:1)
“Indeed the Believers are but brothers. Therefore reconcile the differences between your brothers, and fear Allah so that you may receive mercy.” (Al-Qur’an 49:10).
You and your future husband are in our prayers, sister. We wish you the best.
Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.