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Husband Loves His Sisters More Than Me

Questioner

Anonymous

Reply Date

Dec 31, 2017

Question

Assalaamu Alaikum! I am married since 2015. My in-laws died before my proposal. I had an arranged marriage and I am living far from my family. My husband has two sisters who chose me for their brother. All the time, his sisters want authority over my husband’s the home. His elder sister is married to her cousin and they both were living with us until last Ramadan. Until that time, his elder sister was so much controlling us, but my husband didn’t mind that at all. He gave the household expense to his elder sister firstly instead of me. Then since she shifted to her own house near our home, my husband has started giving the money to his younger sister. Both the sisters get upset if my husband spends time together with me or goes outside alone. Both are so insecure. Even they had many times fights with me on silly things in the kitchen about household work. I just hate their attitude towards me. My elder sister in law, who shifted to her home 4 months ago, always have an eye and ears for us. She takes a report from my younger sis in law about what’s going on in our home. My husband gives so much importance to his sisters. He tells and shares everything with them. He doesn't share with me anything. He even doesn't value my family and becomes very reserved in front of them. I often tried to communicate with him properly about my issues, but he always starts fighting with me. He is also very insecure about me as I belong to a rich family. He is not really well off. His sisters always want his attention and time. There are so many other issues I am facing in my married life. What should I do? Please help me!

Counselor

Answer


Husband Loves His Sisters More Than Me

As-Salamu ‘Aleikom,

In this video, you will learn about:

The possible reasons why your husband feels so concerned about his sisters

How to communicate with your husband at this time

How to deal with your sisters-in-law

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Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.

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About Aisha Mohammad

Aisha received her PhD in psychology in 2000 and an MS in public health in 2009. Aisha worked as a Counselor/Psychologist for 12 years for Geneva B. Scruggs Community Health Care Center in New York. Aisha specializes in trauma, depression, anxiety, substance abuse, marriage/relationships issues, as well as community-cultural dynamics. She is certified in Restorative Justice/ Healing Circles, Conflict Resolution, Mediation, and is also a certified Life Coach. Aisha works at a Family Resource Center, and has a part-time practice in which she integrates healing and spirituality using a holistic approach. Aisha plans to open a holistic care counseling center for Muslims and others in the New York area in the future, in sha' Allah. Aisha is also a part of several organizations that advocate for social & food justice. In her spare time she enjoys her family, martial arts classes, Islamic studies as well as working on her book and spoken word poetry projects.

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